After hiding substance abuse for 3 years, anxious Samantha has decided to try out a agnostic/atheist AA meeting.
She immediately connects with a senior member, Adam Sackler.
He becomes her sponsor, keeping their relatio
nship strictly professional...
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"Do you think your substance abuse steams from your biological mother?" The therapist asked Sam.
"Well, I don't know. I would have to say when my mother left is when I became depressed. I kinda felt like she did'nt love me as much as she loved drugs. I believed she chose herione over raising me."
The therapist scribbled a few notes in her notepad as Samantha spoke franticly. Over time therapy became less awkard an it felt good to talk to someone who was nonbias.
"My dad tried his very best in raising a rebellious daughter by himself. I think he believed if he brought in a mother figure, it would magically fill the void. But instead Kim made me angry as hell."
"There was also a short period of time I was sleeping around to fill the void. I just wanted to feel loved ya know? But being loved isn't fucking waking up alone in a stranger's bed ,naked an not remembering anything."
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The therapist clicked her pen and put down the notepad. This was the part where she would offer a diagnosis right before their time was up.
"You mentioned how you believed your mother chose addiction over you Samantha. BUT people with addiction lose control over their actions. You now face the same hardships as your mom. No control." The therapist reminds her.
Sam sighed heavily. It absolutely irks her to be placed in the same boat as her mother. But it's the sad truth she's faced with.
"The brain actually does change with addiction, and it takes a good while of work to get it back to normal. The more drugs or alcohol you've taken, the more disruptive it is to the brain."
"So .... how does that help me?" Sam retorted getting frustrated that it felt like her mom was getting a 'get out jail free' card for abandoning her.
"I think it would be a good idea to contact your biological mother Samantha. Maybe it's the closure you need in order to heal."
She's had over a decade to be a part of my life since the day she left..
