The Greatest (Zoro x Tashigi)

10: The Legend

"and that is how the Shlipentots took over the East Blue for an entire century before being overthrown by the Celestial Dragons-" Usopp rambles as we walk up the stairs to the kitchen, my hand trailing on the rail as I listen to the sniper finish his tale.

"and you were able to identify the plant species just from the description of the shape of the clouds?" I ask, eyebrows against my hair line as I stare at the pirate in awe. Our research and development branch would be in heaven~

"TASHIGI~CHWAAAAN! You must hurry before Luffy steals all your food!" Sanji shouts from the kitchen door a few feet away as Usopp and I top the stairs. My eyes widen and I rush forward in a quick, stiff walk.

"Sorry Sanji-san, I should not have been late. I promise it won't happen again." I duck my head apologetically and slip past the swooning cook into the dining room.

The room is packed tight now with all 10 sweaty pirates, hollering and grabbing and cackling and shouting as they stuff food in their mouths. Usopp dives past me into a free space on the bench and starts scooping fiesta rice into a bowl and straight into his mouth alternatively.

The sniper had finished the tour Robin started with me earlier, which is how he ended up explaining the origins of his plant weapons as we walked around the garden bins up above.

The Thousand Sunny is as fantastical as it is practical;

Defying every expectation and hope Smoker and I had sketched in our military strategizing to take the Strawhats down over the past few years. I blush. Then slip into a seat at the very end of the table.

Taking dinner with the enemy.

"TASHIGI-CHWAAAN!! Why are you all the way at the end! Guests should be in the center- with the best access to food!" Sanji swoops over to me, gently pulling me up and guiding me to the middle of the table; and plopping me down right in between Franky and Jimbei.

Oh my.

"Sanji~kun, are you playing favorites with the ladies?" Nami asks, a teasing croon in her voice as she bats her eyelashes at the cook before winking at me. Sanji pirouettes into a frenzy as he deposits dish after dish of delicacy and spoilings in front of all three of us. Only for the men to start grabbing for the tiny crab cakes and tasty tacos-- which ends in stabbed robot hands and shouting matches.

I stare in gross fascination at the din of dinner, plate of food untouched in front of me as I watch the chaos all around me.

Chaos.

Yes, chaos.

That's the word I've been looking for.

Picking up my fork, I pick at my food, eyes wide and a grin slowly twitching my lips up as I disappear in the din.

Just like mess hall, only some how crazier and- [better].

I have a bite of potato hovering between my plate and mouth as I watch Luffy bite Usopp's nose while Usopp steals Luffy's roll and Chopper screams but sneaks a hoof over to Nami's plate but gets fur shaved off by a carving knife as Sanji roars then Zoro is jumping over the table and-

"This is insanity," I whisper.

"HMM?" Jimbei grunts and leans closer to me. "WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

"What? oh! nothing-" I deflect, stuffing the potato bite in my mouth and chewing furiously.

-- 'symptoms range from hallucination to loss of circulation'- 'please, we are almost out of food. We can work with anyone to ensure safe transition of dry goods-'--

The paste in my mouth turns to ash. I swallow, throat dry.

"WHAT? NO- YOU SAID SOMETHING!" Jimbei shouts, then huffs in annoyance and bangs the table hard three times in a row. The whole dining room goes still. I freeze.