Queen of Ashes

9| Caught Off Guard

Eli's muscles are tense under my fingertips. The room shakes with his energy.

Our bond drowns me in pride, love, worry, skepticism, and hope, all mixing. It's choking and suffocating me. A cough burns my lungs and throat, desperation growing.

Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath. Trying to remain calm. I had hopes I would calm Eli through the bond.

"It's where I'll be the safest," I say. Voice soft, but I know he heard me. He's so overwhelmed that his mind opens for me. I'm only granted this to me in the rarest moments.

"No one would expect you to leave your castle. Not when Yasmin is still within a day of here."

"I don't care about any of that," I answer out loud. Warm eyes overflowing with worry meet my green ones. His eyebrows fall forward. His question hangs in the air between us. 

"Take me to where I am loved and where I am free." That is all I say. That's all I have to say.

A warm hand wraps around my ankle, and I feel myself being pulled off the bed. Momentarily, I am in Eli's arms. My feet are being settled on the floor. Soft lips brush against mine. They're gone all too soon. 

"Get what or who you want to bring. I have to go talk to my men." His men? Now it was my turn to wear confusion on my face.

"The wolves need time to prepare for their Luna's return." He thought as he scrolled out the door.

Neither of us cares about the rules anymore. I tried to distract myself from my heart squeezing at how the wolves will react to me returning. It's been far too long since I'd been among them, at least by their customs.

Looking around my odd but somehow working room, a feeling settles in the bottom of my stomach.

I won't be here again for a long time. A lump forms in my throat. 

Why am I so sad all of a sudden, it's not the first time I've left here. An idea crept into my brain as if it was a cold draft gliding under the door. 

This is the first time, I've had to run away. 

I let out a big breath. Maybe Silas was right. 

Eyes hard, hatred fills his cool blues. My spine taunt as if I had a cable running out of my head. 

"You're nothing. A disappointment. I'm glad you're mother is dead, save her the disgrace of seeing you like this," he spat. The venom in his words is enough to melt what love I had scrounged together in my absence. 

On second thought, let me fix my crown and remember who I am. 

Cordelia Nikolaevich. 

First of her name. Holder of many titles.

Exiled princess. Traitor for running with the wolves. 

The one they thought they burned alive, who rose from the ash. 

Queen of Ashes. The one who returned and burned the Lost King.

Moon Blessed. Luna to the Feral King. 

The fae's Last Hope, their Chosen Warrior. 

Saver of the people, I've done so much in my short time. Yet I still can't shake these ghosts out of my soul. 

Yasmin's downfall will soon be added to that list. I try to comfort myself. Only to make things worse. 

A sharp pain pings in my chest. My heart clenches. Sadness floods me. Memories dance across my mind. Yasmin and I playing when we were young, running through these halls. Hiding from each other in the gardens. 

I flinch as I feel wetness on my cheeks. As if the tears burn me. 

Why must she force my hand like this? I ponder to myself while I pace a hole into the stone floor below me. 

A quick rap on my door rips me out of my thoughts. I open the door, without so much as a second thought. 

The moment I turned the handle, someone was pushing into my room. They were in for the fight of their life.

I pushed myself off the door and slide back into a defensive crouch. Using my small frame to my advantage. 

Eli. Hurry. That was all I had the chance to think before I had to shift my attention back to whoever had just barged into my room. Tuning my hearing for heartbeats, the last thing I need is to be snuck up on. The door swung into the wall, with a heavy thud. 

Fuck. This is gonna suck. 

Standing in front of me was one of Eldron's best warriors. The decorations on his armor hint to this. He smirks at me. I roll my eyes and tense my muscles. If he strikes first, he'll burn through his energy fast, but I am rusty so he might get a few in. If I strike first, he can overbalance me. All these thoughts are racing through my mind. 

Why is my life never easy? I'm already tired of this. I just wanna go home guys like the fuck? Throwing caution to the wind, I make the first move. I spring forward and throw a fist out, feeling it connect roughly before I dance back. 

He grunts and barely moves an inch. His obnoxious smile grows.

Okay, I'm going to love wiping that off your face. I risk it all. Closing the distance between us.  

My fist strikes out again, this time to the side of his face. His head follows my fist, I grab his shoulders and shift my foot just behind his. 

Pain blooms as his fist connects with my face, white lights burst across my vision. I hold on to his shoulders and send a prayer to the old gods. My ability to take a hit makes him falter, I take my chance.

My head lunges forward and directly into his nose. I suck in a breath when his teeth connect with my forehead. Great now I don't know whose blood is running in my eyes. 

The headbutt did the job and he stumbles back enough for his foot to hit mine. I shove his shoulders and he falls to the ground. Tumbling my body so I go with him. I throw a few more quick blows, counting in my head. Finally, the large man under me gets upset. Twelve seconds. Slow response time.

His arms flail out, connecting with my body in multiple places. Something stirs in me. 

A long sleeping part of me. 

A part I had to beat into sleeping. Okay, more like I beat it into a coma. 

I smile at the fae, again he falters. Let's give this guy a fair chance. 

You caught me, I just want to fight a bit longer. I do my best to block his hits and act like I'm actually hurt. 

I'm trying to put my back towards a wall. He's buying my act. 

Sucker. 

My muscles groan from his outburst. I need him to come to me. I flinch like I'm going to strike again and he takes the bait. I wait until he's too close for comfort and sidesteps. Using his momentum I guide him head first into the stone wall. 

Poor fellow stuns himself and using his moment of weakness against him I jump on his back. My arms snake around his neck. 

"Don't fight," I shush him. "The more you fight, the more likely I am to kill you." I flex my muscles to run the point home. He's only got seconds left before he passes out anyway. As soon as his body relaxes I let him go.  

"Ah, I see you passed the first trial." A smug voice finds my ears. I roll my eyes again. One day they're gonna roll right out of my head. 

"Eldron, a little warning next time," I say. 

"Eli is on his way, you best have your explanation ready," I let the words settle between us. Weighing the air down. Silence rings in my ears.

Finding something to busy myself with, I started to gather my things. None of it really matters, but I know Eli will fuss if I don't bring something.