Battle Scars

The truth

Eve hadn't gone to training for a while. Instead, her last few days had been spent with Rhys and Amren and Feyre. Azriel had his own tasks and Cassian had gone to meet Eris on his own. She had not even been staying at the House of Wind- too tired to make trips up and down, ultimately deciding to stay at Az' place in Velaris till Amren deigned it alright for her to resume her normal routine.

This all started three days after Feyre revealed her pregnancy when Eve had finally opened up to Rhys.

She stood in his office, her eyes trailing the green shrubs that could be seen from his window to Rhys. Rhys didn't comment, but his eyes shone with anticipation and she could see how hard it was for him to hold back.

"Amren has been searching for the carranam bond, correct?" she asked. He nodded.

She had asked to meet him in the early hours of dawn and he had obliged. He had come to pick her up since she did not want Az to know. And Feyre was getting her much needed rest.

Eve now looked at him expectantly. He sighed. "She has not yet found anything." Eve smiled smugly. Sometimes, she wondered, why was it that all things that Eve had asked of Amren- she could not find anything on. Some researcher. But, she was not foolish enough to voice these thoughts, knowing that there was a reason Amren had gained her reputation as a demon and a resourceful researcher.

"I asked you to meet because," she inhaled, "it is time I tell you everything that happened that day. With the uncertain times that are upcoming, you should know."

"I made the mistake of pressuring you once. And I'll admit I am having a hard time but, I am trying to let go of that fact that I did not need to know everything, be in control of everything. So please, know that you can take your time."

She smiled, "I know." He took her in and he must have found some amount of certainty there that made him nod.

"When I was transported back in there," she exhaled, letting herself remember it again. "I met the Mother. I did not see her as much as I felt her though."

Rhys leaned ahead, and she could she he was fascinated and curious in equal measures. "She offered me a way back home. I could have returned back to Earth. There was a portal and I could almost feel everything again." She could not hide the hiraeth that whispered in her voice then.

"But?" Rhys asked, conflicted. He would have given everything to help the female he saw as his sister but, he was glad she was here instead.

"But Mike wouldn't have been there with me, and I had changed too much from my experiences here. I did not if my parents had already mourned me or not. I did not know how much time had passed and," she hesitated, knowing the guilt that was about to settle into Rhys upon hearing her next words.

He sat quietly, ever patient as Eve sort out her words.

"And she offered me a deal. The thing is... I saw everything that was happening near the Cauldron too. How Amren wasn't there anymore, how you had sacrificed yourself to save Prythian, and were too tired to completely return; your life-source too depleted."

"Eve," Rhys breathed, "what did you do?"

"I-" she shifted, "I did what I had to." She settled on saying. "The Mother said I could either save you and Amren or go back home. I couldn't do both." She was right; emotions marred in his eyes now.

"You have to understand Rhys that I did what my heart told me to."

"I kept you from your home," he breathed as he suddenly got up, feeling sick. And Eve realised that though she had blamed him during the first few months after the end of the war, in the end, she was the one who had made her decision. And yes, maybe her friendship with him had affected it but the end decision of her staying here and been solely hers and he was in no way or form guilty of it.