Addicted (Billy Hargrove)

- eleven -

- Stacy Harrington -

Song: Pain by The War On Drugs

I feel kind of overwhelmed today but I decide it will be a good day because I haven't had one in a bit and lord knows I need a good day every once in a while. I get myself dressed, putting on some shorts and a baggy cropped sweatshirt. I brush my hair before heading outside and getting onto Darla to head to school.

Today, Billy is the one avoiding me. Not that I was clearly chasing after him, because we wouldn't want Steve to see or anything, but he looked away from any glances of mine and he walked away whenever I was within reach.

Maybe I scared him off after trying to talk to him last night, even though he said there was nothing to worry about. Did I push the limits? Either way I want answers. Not about his home life, but why he is pushing me away when he said it was okay.

When I get home after school I give some people I know a call this time. Then I head out to go to Billy Hargrove's house.

🚬🚬🚬

I park Darla on some side street. I walk over to his house and see a shadow of his figure walking around in what I assume is his room. I walk over and look into it. Music is playing as Billy is spraying his front curl with some hair spray. He has a cigarette hanging out of his mouth, and he looks hot as he looks at himself in the mirror. Then he grabs some cologne and puts it in his pants. My jaw drops. I knock on the window and he jumps and looks over to see me peeking through the crack in his blinds. He walks over, lifts them up and opens the window for me.

"Hey handsome" I say as I step into his room.

"What are you doing at my house?"

"What are you doing putting cologne in your pants?"

His eyes narrow, raising his eyebrows as he looks at me and then he throws his head back as he laughs. "I had some plans, gorgeous."

I heart drops with my smile. "With who?"

"Tina, why?"

"Nothing" I lie. "I was just wondering."

"You're lying."

"I'm not."

"Yes you are. You're doing that little thing you do when you lie."

I realize I'm picking at my head, a bad habit I get when I'm anxious. Shit. I immediately pull my hand away and I cross my arms.

"Why do you care?"

"I should be asking you the same thing." He walks closer to me. "Why do you care that I'm going out with Tina?"

"I don't."

"Don't lie to me, gorgeous."

I huff. I want to say something, but I keep myself quiet in fear that I will say something stupid. Billy goes to open his mouth but stops there is a knock on his bedroom door. His body goes stiff. He walks over to open the door and who I assume are his mom and dad stand on the other side.

"What's wrong?"

"Why don't you tell us?" The man says.

"Because I don't know" Billy snaps at him.

"We can't find Maxine" the redheaded woman standing next to the man says. She sounds concerned, so I have to assume Maxine is her daughter, Billy's sister.

"And her windows open" the man adds. "Where is she?" The man has a sharp tone to his voice.

"I don't know" Billy says. He sounds worried, scared even.

"You don't know?"

"Look I'm sure she just, I don't know, went to the arcade or something. I'm sure she's fine." He walks over to his closet.

"You were supposed to watch her."

"I know Dad, I was." Billy grabs a black leather jacket to put over his maroon shirt. "Its just you guys were three hours late, and I have a date to get to." He looks worried but keeps a straight face. "I'm sorry, okay?"

"So that's why you're sitting in here with this hoe instead of watching your sister."

 "I have been looking after her all week dad. Can't I get a break? Its her problem if she wants to run off. She doesn't need me as her babysitter. She's not my sister!" Billy yells and turns off his music. Suddenly, his dad launches himself at Billy and holds himself against the bookshelf and I gasp quietly.

"What did we talk about?" His dad mumbles before smacking Billy across the face. The woman winced and looks at me as if she was apologizing. As if this is her fault. I look back over to Billy who's Dad's hand is on his neck. He repeats his words from earlier but slower.

"Respect and responsibility" Billy grunts out.

"That is right" his dad congratulates him. "Now, apologize to Susan."

"I'm sorry Susan" he whispers.

"Its okay Neil really-"

"No, his behavior is not okay" he pulls away and keeps eye contact with Billy. "But he's going to make up for it. He's gonna get this whore out of here" he gestures to me "and cancel their date. And then he's gonna go find his sister like the good respectful brother he is." He gets up in Billy's face again. "Isn't that right?!" He screams.

"Yes. Sir." Billy snaps back. Neil whispers something to him I don't catch and then storms out, slamming the door. Billy throws something onto the floor and it shatters. He's looking away but I see him wipe his face and turn to me.

"I don't know what you're lying about but we don't have anything. We aren't anything. I don't have any feelings for you."

Tears start to form at my eyes from both the scene that just happened and the words Billy is shouting at me now. But his voice quiets as he says his final words to me.

"I don't make love. I fuck. So if you are starting to get attached, I suggest you leave."

A small tear runs down my cheek and I quickly wipe it before escaping out the window.

I ride Darla home and tears come flying off my face in the wind. When I get home I change and roll in my covers. Tears soak my pillow as so much runs through my head.

That is why Billy couldn't open up. Its probably why he's so closed off to everyone else to. Why he acts up.

But its the words he says after. I knew we weren't anything. We honestly couldn't be anything. But he was right, I started to get attached. So I need to let go.

But why does it feel so hard when I've only known him for such a little amount of time?

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*shakes head and swirls iced caramel latte*

Thank you for reading!!!!

Also I'm literally obsessed w this chapter's song UGH its so good

-Liz<3