Re:Starting as a Ridiculously Broken Great Spirit

Prologue: I woke up and the world chose violence

Generic name #2560 P.O.V

I woke up, same as always, I mean if I didn't that would mean I would have died, pfttt, like that could ever happen anytime soon, I am a young healthy guy y'know? Still got a couple decades until I have to worry about stuff like that. Ah, that's a flag isn't it? God, what am I talking about, I think that my sleep schedule and school are finally catching up to me... welp, time to go suffer in med school! Haha! I love life!

So I got my clothes, took a shower, brushed my teeth, and prepared the materials I would need for school, all normal stuff really. So, with an abnormal amount of energy despite my severe lack of sleep and the appearance of what can be called a former husk of a human being, I left my dormitory.

...

I immediately realized my mistake as I left my keys inside... hmm... well that's a problem for future me now isn't it? Surely such misfortune won't befall kind little old me anymore, right? With this certainly not additional red flag being raised, I continued upon my mission to slave away once more in this monotonous life called the modern day education system, It's for the money, the money, yes the money, all this pain is worth it for the cash, NO ONE CAN STOP MY GRIND, NOT EVEN GOD OR THE WORLD ITSELF HAHAHAHAHA-

...

I fell down the stairs immediately after, whoever God is seems awfully petty today, and I thought I couldn't be beat when it comes to that. Getting up with an awful lot of pain and totally ignoring the fact that anything may be broken, I once more set off to the glorified prison that is my university. Once outside, my little gremlin eyes and pale vampiric complexion were immediately assaulted by the radiance that is the sun that also seems very intent on giving me both skin and eye damage, just great, as if I am not already in enough misery at the moment, skin cancer and bad eyesight are just the cherries on top... woohoo...

Continuing from what seems like the 4th misfortune that was thrown at my pathetic self today, I marched onwards and out into the streets of the city I call home. The usual blaring car horns, the chatter of people all mushing together into nonsensical background noise, and the rush of wind from a speeding car being chased by police cars with their sirens flarin- wait what? That same speeding car began drifting at an intersection like some sort of action movie, but obviously it wasn't intentional or the driver simply lacked skill, pathetic, as it hit a fire hydrant before speeding up again, albeit with questionable structural integrity and a massive dent in its side.

Unfortunately, and once again, that fire hydrant so happened to be pointing towards me. So guess who got hit with a high powered jet of water? That's right folks! It's me! Oh, but wait, there's more! Because apparently I was also standing in front of a bakery, and proceeded to get launched through the window into it, well I mean I could use a pastry after all of this. Ah. There are chunks of glass in my leg... this is fine. So I once again get up off the floor, covered in shards of glass, sopping wet, and my bag long gone from my previous tragedies. Why am I still here? Just to suffer? 

"EVERYONE FREEZE AND GET ON THE GROUND!" Excuse me? Is there an idiot seriously robbing a fucking bakery of all things, and yes, I will swear now, I have had enough of this shit today. I quickly swipe a random cinnamon roll of the floor because If I am gonna die might as well die eating some good food. Damn. Now I understand why he is robbing this place, despite it having bits of glass and my blood on it, it was one of the best cinnamon rolls in my life. The robber then finally noticed the absolute mess that was me, just standing there, menacingly eating a cinnamon roll.

Robber: Hey you, whatcha doing just standing there, didn't ya hear me you deaf bastard?

Great, its generic thug A here to ruin my already greaaat day, I am so ready to enthusiastically walk home after all of this, that is if I even get home at this rate.