Troubled Indeed

CHAPTER FIVE

I pace nervously around my kitchen. This day, the day that should be so happy because my mom found her dress, turns out to be the worst one since that night at the restaurant. I still haven't heard anything from Anthony. And now my mind is preoccupied with the shadow of a man I saw outside the bridal shop. I should be planning how to redecorate Lesh, but instead, I'm a nervous wreck. I can feel that something is about to go down. Something bad keeps creeping and lurking around my happiness, ready to jump at me whenever I let my guard down.

I hear keys rattling in the lock and seconds later Anthony is inside.

"Babe? Is everything okay?" he asks me the moment he sees me.

I wasn't expecting him to come back home so soon; it's barely after lunch. Then again, he never told me what time he'd be returning. Suddenly I remember that he hung up when we were last talking. So, this is the first thing I want to talk about.

"Why are you crying?" he says in the softest tone I have ever heard him talk.

I'm crying? I wipe my cheeks and get my confirmation.

"I...I didn't realize I was," I stutter.

"What made you so upset? Did anything happen?" he seems genuinely worried. And he has no idea he's probably the main reason for all my tears.

"Where were you?" I ask him in a demanding tone. It comes out bossier than I intended but I decide to roll with it.

"What's it to you? I had a meeting." That's it. His walls are up again. Gone is the gentle man who talked to me just a few heartbeats before.

"With...?" I want to find out if he was with another woman.

"What the fuck is this? Why are you suddenly so interested in what I'm doing?" he crosses his arms on his chest. "I'm here now, aren't I? So let this fucking shit go!" he slightly raises his voice.

I can't let someone talk to me like that. Even if my questions were invasive, why is he getting so defensive? Unless...there's actually a reason for it. Maybe he is seeing someone else...

"Are you cheating on me?" my mouth says before my brain catches up with it. But I stand by my question and I'm not backing down, even though tears are ready to burst out of my eyes. I don't really want to know the answer to my question. I don't want to be heartbroken if this turns out to be true.

"What the fuck?" he whispers as if he can't believe I just said this. His eyes are wide, and his arms drop to his sides immediately. "How could you even think something like that? I'm crazy about you. I even tattooed your lips on my fucking neck." He steps closer to me, so we're almost chest-to-chest.

I can't take the tension and lower my head. I start sobbing and I can't control it. He's right. It's ridiculous. I'm turning into a jealous madwoman I never wanted to be. I can't control his every move. I just have to trust him.

He tilts my head back up with his index finger. He looks me in my watery eyes and sighs.

"Babe. Let me make this clear. I love you. Only you. And yours is the only pussy I ever want to touch."

I gasp. Shit, that's intense.

He steps closer and takes me in his arms. He lowers his head and rubs his nose against mine. I close my eyes. I love him. I love him so much it hurts, and I'm terrified of the thought of ever losing him. I feel his minty breath closing in on me as his lips softly touch mine. I go along with it. My reaction only fuels his intentions, and he gently caresses my butt with his palms. Our kiss deepens and intensifies in nanoseconds and I'm struggling with myself to let this happen slowly. I want to rip his clothes off, but I restrain myself because I need to feel his soft caressing and touching. I need him to reassure me that he only has eyes and hands for me.

He moves his hands up and down my back, sending shivers throughout my body and I'm ready to give myself to him. It's like he's cast a spell over me. I slip my fingers beneath his hoodie and grab the waist of his jeans when a vibration stops me. I can feel it on my waist, his phone is buzzing. It takes him two seconds to realize the same. He gently kisses me on my lips again and takes out his phone.

"What?" he says furiously.

I'm not sure if he's upset because we got interrupted or because he's not very fond of the person on the other end of that call.

"Leave me fucking out of it," he says aggressively and turns away from me, "I told you, I'm out." And he hangs up. Just like he did to me this morning.

I don't say anything. I wouldn't know what to say anyway. It's not my business who's he talking to as long as he's faithful to me. But I'm definitely curious – why would he say he's out? What was he "in" for before?

He rubs his head with his palms and growls.

"Do you..." I try to talk to him.

"No, I don't want to fucking talk about it," he cuts me off mid-sentence. "What I'd like to do is fuck my woman," he looks at me and realizes what he just said. My eyebrows shoot up instantly. He takes a deep breath, then tries to soften his rough words. "Sorry babe, what I meant is I'd really want to have you right now, you know, make love. But instead, I have to go back out there and sort some shit out. FUCK!"

"No, no, I get it," I shrug, and then try to lift his mood a little bit, "I wouldn't mind fucking, lovemaking can get boring over time. You go do your thing." I wink at him playfully. I try to smile at him, but a pang of disappointment hits me at the same time. I was looking forward to this.

I've made him speechless, though. He's just standing there and scanning me from head to toe. If he says 'fuck' one more time, I'm going to jump on him and not let go until we're completely exhausted.

"Damn babe. Who are you?" he replies after a while, equally playfully. "This is exactly why I love you. You never seem to stop impressing me. Rain check?"

"Sure," I say nonchalantly.

He takes two quick steps and I'm in his warm embrace, he crushes his lips against mine and his tongue quickly makes its way into my mouth. If he won't let go now, we're going to be unstoppable. As if on cue, he lets go of me, but just as he's about to move away I gently bite his lower lip.

"Fuck me," he whispers, shoots me a loaded gaze, then turns around and leaves.

Yeah, fuck me too. I still can't believe that I have him with me. He loves me and I love him. That's all that matters. And at least now I know for sure I don't have to worry about some skank stealing him from me.