#jerusalem

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a/n :  okay guys. this is not narry. it's not even good grammar or writing skills.

my friends just wanted me to post this because of an inside joke. 

one of my friends, Jess, wrote this with me at 1am and we weren't in a good place at all. It was so funny how drunk on some crusty apple juice we were. 

( yes 'Just Juice' )

there is a summary of this inside joke at the bottom. 

if you want something fresh, funny, confusing and weird : go ahead and read. 

but if not, skip to the next chapter. 

enjoy :))

clip. clop. clip. clop.

off to the grocery shop. lets hop. with the bop. make it drop. to the top. watch shit plop. east some slop. what a bop.

My hoovies slammed against the pavement pizza. My coconuts were bouncing up and down. The rainbow lights were flashing into my brain.

maybe it's a sign...

the sky is a loud dinosaur and my green eardrums burst into confetti. why is everyone smiling?

Suddenely, a burning sensation ripped through my back.

i screamed like a dying pussy (cat).

these long, sausage-like, thick, brown...fingers were shoved up my arse.

OoOoOoOoOoOhhhh. That feels so nice...

i catch my skin, crumpling to the ground.

nooOOOOooooOOOO!

they were making me white! that's so racist. I liked my brown, shit-like skin.

it looked so glowy and sexy. gf loved me like that.

suddenly i catch my girlfriends face...omg she is here to save me.

OMG!OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG! SHE LOOKS SO F I N E !

i grab her and throw her onto the bed.

come to papa baby girl....

suddenly her delicate fingers smash my body onto the concrete, heavy feet slammed into my crotch...and other body parts.

i feel her tug on my hair and squeal as it rips out of my roots.

i growl. bbg knows just where to get me.

pain erupted in all corners and crevices of my being. i feel my legs snap in different directions like vecnussy.

Oh god. I moan super loudly and everyone (including gf) looks at me weirdly.

i shriek as my tendons rip away from my body as my legs are torn away.

suddenly the world goes black. (not racist intended) shit, they must have eaten my eyeballz.

delicious.

save me some. i muttered to the girlies and they scoffed at me in embarrassment.

im so good with the ladies. slay queen. yaaaaaas queen.

im so into bald guys. gf muttered to me and i smirk at her.

want some more bbg?

she shakes her head in horrofying protest.

hell yeah. she is so fucking needy.

i spit on my hooves and shove them up her ass.

she screams and starts crying.

god. she's such a pussy. i didn't even shove it up to her stomach, i could feel all the squishy bursty stuff on the inside.

yummy.

i pick my up my discarded left back leg and shove it up my own buttcrack.

HELL YEAH! I moan in pleasure.

i am the only one who can turn me on like that. you know what they say, if your girl isnt giving you head give it to urself.

*chokes on my own dick (and pussy) *

yeah. i am the only one who says that. but its tru. FAX NO PRINTER.

only flexible people like myself are able to do this shit.

idk how to say this but i dont like being a man anymore. i feel like a pussy would suit me much much much much better.

like all the cats will be prowling. MEOW! RAWR!

ok i need to piss now.

*pisses on burning soul*

you know what i really want to try?

fucking a train. then i can actually say i got railed.

OMG IM SO FUNNY!

BAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA!

ok i need to go have sex with a blade of grass now brb y'all.

ur fav furry/karen/manwhore,

jeruselum xx (how do you spell my name)

my space :

ok, if you're reading this, are you okay? how is your mental health after that monstrosity?

here is the summary :

one of my friends brought a brown arabian horse toy for a school project  and i practically stole it and mauled the life out of it. we name him Jerusalem and late change his name to Michael Jerusalem Jackson. this is because we peeled off his skin and he went from brown to white (if yk, yk). he is literally just plastic now and i kinda feel sorry for him. Jess and I decided to write this fic at 1am for our friends.

sorry for the confusion and trauma. narry is next para. 

all the love, 

T xx 

i need help...

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