Dude Looks Like a Lady

Officially Official

(A/N: Okay, I usually have these things at the end but...I'm making an expection for this chapter.

  It's been forever and a day, hasn't it? I've been putting this off due to school work and drivers ed, and I'm finally coming back to it. Yeah! Though, fair warning, all my characters might seem...outta character. It's going to take me a bit to get back into the flow of things, so sorry for anything that seems a bit off, I swear it'll get better.

  And...that's about it. Oh, thank you lovely people who continued reading this story, and making it my most popular by far! Couldn't have done it without ya!

  Hope you all enjoy :) )

***

Life As a Teenage Boy

           -By Antonia Crock

"Whelp," my fingers hovered over the keyboard. This was it. My masterpiece. Could make or break me. Hopefully the former. Oh, god, my stomach is knotting already, "here goes nothing."

***

   Two Hours Later

My brain had died. It was official. Beyond official. Oh god, I can practically hear it decaying inside of my skull.

  With a slight grunt, I hefted myself up into the sitting position, shoulders aching and fingers sore. Two hours and I was done. It was over. Finished. The last sentence bold and sticking out heavily.

   So, this was it? I was...oh. Done.

Funny. No, hilarious actually. Two weeks in and I was done.

   Wow.

I shifted slightly, my laptop twitching in my lap, one hand going into my hair. It was already starting to grow back out. Maybe I should trim it up again. Getting a bit shaggy. Starting to look a bit more feminine...

  Ah, hell. What am I thinking?

   Finishing what I started. I shifted again, cringing at the thought and, for once, hating the fact that Roy went out today into town, leaving me alone with my thoughts. Which are not good company, might I add.

   What was there to possibly finish now? What the hell was I thinking when I told Leslie that? Idiot, idiot, idiot.

  There was nothing to finish now. Nothing else to prove. So why did I decide I was staying? For the full fucking year? I grounded my teeth together and slapped my forehead rather roughly, emphasizing the unspoken word once again: Idiot!

   I'm a girl. I shouldn't even be here. I should be estatic to go back to my school where dicks weren't dominant (pun unintended). Where I could let my boobs breathe and put on a bit of makeup. Where my voice could be normal and I could laugh at jokes I actually understand.

  Instead, like the insane person I am, I'm forcing myself to stay here for the full ride. Risk blowing my cover (which is already blown thanks to Roy and his 'I can pick locks and walk in on you if I want to' sense of mind) for now damn reason!

  I glared at my screen, sneering. This is all your fault, stupid paper, with your stupid ideas and your stupid...stupidness.

  And that wasn't even the end of my problems. Oh, no. It just got progressively worse.

    The fact that I might be, sort of-kind of-quite possibly and undoubtedly attracted to my roommate happened to be on the top of that list.

  I groaned outwardly, sliding down my bed and slamming my head against the pillows repeatedly.

Dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit....

   Breathe. I opened my eyes and slowly look to the screen again. With a quick movement of my fingers and a simple flick of my wrist, the paper is saved to a file.

   That's it. That's the end.

***

   "Hey Tony," he came in, red hair askewed from the wind and freckled cheeks flushed. And, oh god is it possible to have a ladyboner?

   "Hey Roy," I manage to keep myself calm, fiddling around on my laptop.

There was a beat of silence between us and my gut twisted painfully. I wanted to shout: "Y'know, just because I have boobs now doesn't mean we have to be awkward around each other! I can still be one of the guys! But, of course, I keep it to myself, focusing back on my screen like a brain dead zombie.

   He sighed, shrugging off his jacket and throwing himself on his bed. More silence then he sat up again, looking at me, "I talked to Jen today."

  My heart stopped slightly and I swallowed the thickness in my throat, carefully prying for more, "And?" Yes, I know, not the most subtle way.

   "We're through."

"Oh...sorry, that sucks."

   A pause, "Yeah, guess it does. Finished your paper?"

   I nodded, chancing a peek at him, only to find myself being stared down at by those emerald eyes. I fidgeted slightly, then moved back to my game. Stupid pigs, just die already.

   "Can I read it?" he sounded almost hesitant and I was tempted, oh so very tempted.

 "Erm...no, sorry, not a good idea," I finally gave up after the pigs smiled tauntingly at me again, slamming my laptop shut, "Charlie would have my head if I let anyone read it now."

   "Oh?"

"Yeah." I whistled at the end, turning up to the ceiling, "Sorry. Again."

    "No, no," he paused, and I swore I felt his eyes on me. Or maybe it was just my hormones acting up? "It's-yeah, it's fine."

  I turned to face him, only to see him quickly look the other way. "You haven't told anyone, have you?"

"What?"

   I huffed, "About me being, you know, not a guy?"

"Oh! No. Told you I would keep it."

I nodded, rolling onto my back again. The awkwardness was so thick, I could probably cut it with a butter knife, "Good, that's good."

   And with that, the rest of the evening went along in silence.

***

  (A/N: Short chapter is short. Sorry -.-)