Eutopia (Lloyd Hansen AU)

21

Autumn looked at herself in the mirror, hand sliding over the small bump that had begun to appear.

Since finding out she was pregnant, Lloyd had become more attentive to her, constantly checking in, making sure she was taking the right pills, getting rest in between keeping the house clean and tidy.

She felt strange, knowing that inside of her was someone small, but someone who would make a big impact. She tried to feel some connection, tried to smile with happiness, but she couldn't.

No matter how much she wanted to feel something, she just couldn't. 

She was now just over sixteen weeks, her nausea subsiding and now she felt somewhat normal again.

Lloyd's hands slid around her from behind, coming to rest on her stomach. "God you look even prettier now you're becoming all round with our kid". He told her quietly with a kiss on her collarbone.

"I don't feel it". Autumn muttered unhappily

Lloyd turned her around to face him, "Auty, you are. Remember that this is what we do here. It's the goal to build up Eutopia so as our work can carry on once we're gone". He reminded her. "You're doing what every good wife here does. The most important role of all".

Her hormones were all over the place. Had this been a normal situation that she'd wanted then she might have been able to accept it easier. But still she couldn't.

The only silver lining was that Lloyd was beginning to trust her more, and with that she was seeing a different side to him. One that she could tolerate, and one that showed he really did care. The first time she'd seen it had been when Denny had tried to attack her, but now she was carrying their baby? Lloyd had changed once he was in the sanctuary of their home, and being his usual sociopathic self anywhere else outside of that.

Did he love her?

She didn't know, even after all this time. Sure she'd asked him before whether he could, but still the question remained unanswered.

"You need to rest snickerdoodle, don't worry about chores today". He kissed her, stache brushing against her neck. "Do I need to get Doctor Emerson to come and see you?"

Autumn shook her head. "I'm fine. I have to go pick up some things for dinner anyway, maybe the fresh air will do me some good".

"Then get someone to go with you, I'll get someone to send Eva over".

"Lloyd I'm fine, really, I'm not diseased, just pregnant, had we have been anywhere else then I'd be going about my day doing the same thing".

"But we're not 'anywhere else' Auty. We're in Eutopia, we do things different here".

Like she could forget.

He checked his watch. "I need to head out, I'll see you tonight - any problems then you send for Emerson ok?"

She rolled her eyes when he wasn't looking but nodded all the same. "Yes Lloyd".

Lloyd turned on his heel and looked at her. "Autumn..." he warned.

"Lloyd". She threw back. "Honestly I'm ok, if there's anything wrong then you'll be the first to know".

He took her head in his hands and stared into her eyes. "We can't fuck this up. This project? Us? The future of everything we've worked so hard to build up is inside of you. It's a big fucking deal". He told her in a threateningly calm manner. "Once other women see you and the example you're setting? They'll bend to their husbands wills more".

"They will just bend because they have no choice. Because they're forced".

She dreaded to think what went on behind closed doors at other people's homes. Nothing good that was for sure. Aside from Eva, she was a rare case of being treated well. Others weren't so lucky.

Lloyd let her go. "Your hormones are talking, they're all over the place. I'll have Emerson come to look at you".

"For the last time, I don't need to see the fucking doctor!" Autumn snapped and then regretted it, swallowing and regaining her composure. "I'm sorry...".

He sighed and steered her towards the bed. "Go and rest before I have to tie you down, and I will". He warned her, "if it gets you to actually listen and do as I say".

Autumn gave in, and got into bed, Lloyd now heading into the bathroom before coming back out with some pills. "Take them".

"What?"

"Take the damn pills Auty".

"I will if you actually tell me what they are".

He held her down and pushed them into her mouth. "Emerson told me to use them if you're refusing to rest, they won't hurt you or the baby". He hushed her as she was forced to swallow the pills.

"What the..." she became a little lightheaded, her eyes heavy. "Lloyd". She clawed at him as he hushed her more and cradled her in his arms.

"Sleeping pills, now rest sweet pea". He kissed her head as he rocked her. "It's for your own good. I'll be back to check in on you later".

Autumn looked up at him, trying to fight the sleep that was overcoming her, but soon couldn't anymore, slowly drifting off in his arms.

Lloyd kissed her gently and lay her back against the pillows, pulling the sheet over so as he wouldn't get cold.

"Sweet dreams, Autumn leaf".