SIMPHIWE SHANDU THE HUSBAND
CHAPTER 28
JELE
I don’t know if I didn’t come right on time - what would have happened? I would have lost her. The more I think about losing her – the more my feelings of having a fast-beating, fluttering pounding heart take over. She has been out for two days. And for those two days were the most miserable days of my life ever. When we found her lying on the floor inert, on top of her own chunder – made my own stomach turn. She was smelling her own faeces, her own urine...I just don’t want to think about it. I still ask myself this question – if we had not arrived in time, what would have happened? It's true when they say, never rely on police for such sensitive cases – they just throw it back on our faces. I sigh standing up. I don't know when was the last time I went home to eat and take a bath. Two days. Water is all I know these days and that is what my stomach can take at the moment. When I am in pain my appetite sinks to the pit of my stomach.
“Is she still out?” the policeman that took me seriously asks stepping inside her room. I sigh getting off the bed. I am always squashed beside her; I don’t want any mistake of her leaving my side ever again. I don’t think I will ever bear the pain of losing her. It was fine when she was still married and I was able to love her from afar – but now everything has changed.
“Yes, but the doctors say she is okay, just that she inhaled a lot of dust.” I respond looking back at her. We are just hoping for the best so that she is not diagnosed with lung disease called hypersensitivity pneumonitis. If they ever detect that – that means chances of us losing our first child...
“Will back later on to check up on her.” he says walking out of the room. I am thankful that he took me seriously and saved someone's life.
“Thank you.” I say before he steps out of the room.
“Was just doing my job, sir.” He smiles and takes his leave. I sit back on the bed and hold her hand. I smile caressing on her flat tummy. I can't wait for her to be big. I want to feel those baby kicks. Mini Jele running around would be the most treasurable present one has ever got to receive. As absurd as it looks - I have always imagined myself having a kind family with this divorcee. I don’t know what made me so stupid to even think that one day she would carry my me. I carried that positivity till now. And now she is here in my arms and in my heart. Like she was supposed to in the first place. I heard\ her groan trying to move but the pain shot through. The facial expression says it all.
“Babe.” I call her. I am happy and afraid at the same time. Doctors are still yet to do more tests which makes me not okay at all.
“Hmm.” she mumbles trying to take the pipe out of her mouth. I am a doctor myself, but this is not my case. I click on the buzzer and the nurse walks in with a huge wry face. She composes herself when her eyes land on Nozi.
“She is awake.” she says putting her gloves on rushing towards her, Nurses with attitude, will kill patients one day. “Please step out for me sir.” she says looking at me. I am not going anywhere and I am not answering her even. I sit down not giving her my attention. I have a lot of things to worry about other than her gloomy countenance face. She glances in my direction and huffs.
“If I were you, I would mind how I handle the patients. I am also a doctor but I do not let my status say otherwise.” I speak. I wish we admitted her to the hospital I work in. The care there is better. Eshowe Hospital has better hospitality. She clears her throat and does not respond. She removes the securement device from her nose. This allows for the tube to be easily removed. She pulls for it slowly...they had to sustain her body to be strong so that her body does not get tired and loose on to the holding – meaning she might lose the baby in a later stage. That is why she was being fed in a tube for those certain minutes and it will be removed again.
“Are you okay? Blink twice if you feel any pain?” She shouts like she is talking to a deaf person. Nozi blinks multiple times. The nurse sighs and steps back. I don't understand why people will look for jobs in the department where they do not fully enjoy. Why did she do nursing course in the first place?
“Where does it hurt?” Nozi slowly lifts her hand up and points at her chest. A spine-tingling causing my heart to stir. She groans again. I stand up and stand by her side.
“Babe,” I want to cry but I have to stay strong for her.
“Will call the doctor to examine her.” she says walking out.
Minutes later she comes back with the doctor that has been on Nozi’s side ever since she was admitted. She scans her eyes and listens to the breathing on her chest.
“We need to do a scan – just to make sure that the baby is okay.” How can I forget when I was told that they found fluid in her stomach but It can be drainable with the help of medication.
“Here is the fetal pole.” she points out at the tiny dot on the screen. Everything is just a blur but I am happy nonetheless. “Listen to that.” The day has come to say hello – finally being a father, to see the one who's still so small. A heartbeat bringing many tears, but still will come all the fears. I am really going to be a father in a few months' time. This is an emotional pace for me. I wish my mother was here to witness all of this. Don’t want to be facing the dad syndrome!
“You look scared.” she says, turning to face me. Shes pretty but not my cup of tea.
“I am excited and afraid at the same time.” I say rubbing my hands together. How will I ever thank Nozi for this.
“It’s normal to be scared about becoming a new parent as the experience can be quite daunting. Most people have many feelings of uncertainty when they have their first child. This is perfectly normal.” I guess she is right. “Call me if you need anything.” She hands me her card before stepping out of the room. The nerve!
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