SECOND

Chapter 10

I don't really know how concerts work kasi first time ko talagang maka-attend. Maaga pa lang ay nandito na kami ni Maire nakaabang sa labas ng arena. Nakakaoverwhelm ang dami ng tao sa ganitong oras. Imagine hindi pa sumisikat ang araw pero may mga naka-abang na dito. Hindi ko alam kung ang iba ba ay dito na natulog o hindi na natulog. While Maire and I arrived at 6 in the morning.

I wasn't really prepared for this, hindi ko alam kung ano ang dadalhin, o kung ano ang susuotin. It was so unexpected, and even me agreeing to this is the most unexpected thing.

Maire promised that she will be the one to buy our food pero dahil girl scout ako, nagbaon pa rin ako ng biscuit para makain ko habang naghihintay. Mahaba pa ang araw at hindi ko naiisip kung ano ang magagawa ko dito. Sanay na rin naman akong maghintay ng matagal, kaya lang mabilis din akong ma-bored.

Nakaupo kami sa isang bench dito. I am thinking na umidlip muna. Wow, iidlip ako in public, not my first time tho. Sana lang hindi ako iwan ni Maire dito ng mag-isa. I put out my earphones at isinuot ito. I shuffled my playlist and Missing You by The Vamps started playing.

I then drifted to dreamland.

Napapitlag ako ng maramdaman na may kamay na humawi sa buhok ko. I don't wanna open my eyes kasi mawawala ang antok ko pag binuksan ko ang mata ko kaya mas pinili kong manatiling nakapikit. I can feel that someone's presence, too close, that it feels so real.

"Sher"

Napamulat ako nang marinig ko iyon. Napalingon ako sa paligid. Andito pa rin naman ako sa labas ng arena. Maire is still beside me, playing on her phone. Marami pa ring tao sa paligid.

"Anong oras na?" I spoke. Napalingon naman sakin si Maire, "8 AM pa lang."

I sighed. 8 AM, eight. Napatulala naman ako. What was that? Was that a dream? But it felt real, so real.

The voice, that familiar voice. May naramdaman akong kirot sa puso ko nang marinig ko ang boses na 'yon, and this one was different. I don't want to admit but I felt relieved hearing that voice, it was as if I heard my favorite melody. And I'm sure it was his.

No, that was a dream. He isn't here, in a public place like this.

It feels so new, him calling my name. Hindi ako sanay that it brings so much emotions. I remember that voice, talking to me, teasing me and giving me assurance. Akala ko hindi ko na maririnig ang boses na yon ng ganoon kalapit dahil sa mga pag-iwas na ginagawa ko. It never really appeared in my dreams, until today.

Why? Why does it need to happen today? Was it a sign? Kasi makikita ko na naman siya mamaya, and I will hear his voice even more longer than how I heard it in my dreams.

Sunghoon. It was him, in my dreams.

Kagabi pa ako hindi makatulog, nag-iisip kung handa na ba akong makita siya. I wasn't even ready, but I didn't know kung bakit ako pumayag. I am always not ready for this. But someone is doing my job for me, and that is my stupid mind. I also had the assurance na hindi niya ako mapapansin kasi malaki ang arena at mukhang langgam lang siguro ako sa paningin nila. Makikipag siksikan din ako sa VIP Standing kaya sigurado akong hindi niya ako mapapansin dahil maraming tao ang nasa paligid ko.

Kamusta na kaya siya? Sila? I have not been updated with them. I don't even know kung may nagbago ba sa mga hair colors nila o ano. But after all these years, I am listening to their songs. I still can't leave them afterall, and with another reason, the reason that I have in me that I don't wanna admit. My favorite melody is his voice.

I remember it all now, how I calmed down whenever I am frustrated, how I was able to go on after all those nights I broke down. I remember it all now, it's all because of them and their songs, and his voice, my favorite melody.