Our Deadly Sins

Ch 16

We walked along the sidewalk, hand in hand. The swirling thoughts inside my head rang loud about what was to come. Is she right? Will everything be okay? What if it isn't? She says she will protect me but what if this was her plan all along? But what are the odds of that? I don't want to leave her high and dry but I also don't want to face her sister head on, even if she doesn't recognize me this could be bad for us both. But if she does it'll be just as bad. But will it make a difference? If she's able to be in town then that's already a risk. How do I know that Sav really has my back here. can I trust her?

"The weather is nice out today."

I quickly snapped out of my thoughts. "Oh, yeah, I guess it is nice."

Sav tilted her head. "Are you still worried?" I nodded and she gave my hand a gentle squeeze. "You have every right to be scared but I'm telling you it is gonna be okay. I have control, even if you don't think I do."

Say it. Go on. You're thinking it. "Yeah, maybe you're right." I can't. I can't do that to her.

Sav sat us down on a bench, the sun made everything have a pleasant outer glow and made the water from the lake in front of us shimmer brightly. I laid back and allowed the warmth to graze my skin. "I know that you are thinking that it's gonna be too much. I will give you the key to the bedroom and you can lock yourself in there if you really think you need it." Sav slid her hand up and down my arm gently. "I really want to give you the support you need but I also am gonna have my own things to do, I'll do that to give you an out if you don't feel safe."

"I won't feel safe. "I replied to her. "I am gonna have to be in the same house as the woman who wants me dead for escaping her. If she finds out my life is over. I finally got to start new and now it's all getting complicated again." Frustration lurched inside me and I grabbed the bridge of my nose. "You will never understand what it's like to be in my position. That's just a fact. I love that you are trying to help me but how do I know that your motives are clear? How do I know that you won't just feed me to her the first chance you get?"

Her face turned sour and I started to feel as though I had done something wrong. "I would never do anything like she has. She deserves to be punished and if she hurts you she will definitely get what she deserves. I am doing everything I can to offer you a safe space but you don't seem to be willing to cooperate." She folded her arms and turned to me. "You don't expect me to stay away from my family do you?"

I felt my face heat up and my eyes lower. My tone came out more guilt ridden than I had wanted. "That's not what I was asking of you. I understand that is your family and you have every right to be with them, but at the same time I have a right not to be. I do want to meet your parents and be able to be a normal couple but not with her. I don't think it can happen like that." I sighed, my chest carrying the pain of sadness. "I love you, more than I have been capable of in a very long time. But you aren't seeing my side of things. I'm terrified. I'm even more scared of the fact that you are discouraging me leaving the house for that day. It's frustrating."

Sav unfolded he arms. "I just think that we should do things normal couples should do regardless of what happened."

My eyes widened as I looked up at her. "So your saying that after everything I have been through, You are genuinely expecting me to put it all aside for you?"

Her face darkened to a shade of red. "N-no I didn't mean to-"

"So now that you know what you said your backtracking." I scowled at her. "Unless you understand my side of the story, I will do whatever the hell I want. Obviously you don't seem to have it in you." I stood up. "Maybe I should just go home."

Sav stood up to meet me. Tears threatened to spill over as her lip quivered, her eyes showing desperation. "You're right. I've been insensitive. L-look, maybe we can sit here and you can tell me everything. After that maybe I will understand things better."

I looked at her and sighed. "You are a lucky woman, I'll give you that." I sat back down. "For starters, I will be leaving the house until you find a way for me to see your parents without he being there. Secondly, you will keep in contact with me about where you're sister is at, and you will refrain from talking to me otherwise until they are gone."

Sav gave a sigh but nodded. "I'll do my best. For now I'm all ears."

I noticed she was fidgeting with her hands as I continued. "You're sister and I were friends in high school The basic story is that she lured me out late at night, got me drunk and drugged me, and took me somewhere. The first couple of weeks I was there are still hazy because I was drugged a lot, but she raped me several times and beat the shit out of me when she was angry. I would cook and clean for her, basically be her personal slave who she could stick her fingers in whenever she wanted. She mentally abused me and gaslit me into thinking that with her was the safest place for me. After awhile, I believed her. I don't want to go into specific details of anything yet but at least now you should know enough to get the gist of what everything was like."

Sav stared at me. "I never knew. I saw the papers and I was there to testify at the trial but I never knew it was that easy for her to do something that vile to anyone. She had always been so sweet to me and the rest of the family that none of us knew she had it in her. That's why I want her do be redeemed so badly, because I want my sister back, but something tells me that will never happen."

I raised my eyebrow. "You got all that from a summary?"

She shook her head. "I already knew but I didn't wanna believe it. I guess now I don't have a choice."

I sighed. "Well, it gets worse the more details I give you."

"I cant even begin to imagine."

"That's the thing, I didn't have to."