Until You

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve

I laid down on my bed not wanting to get up. I kind of regretted telling Daniel. It was two weeks after I told him about me. I don't want to go to school tomorrow. I felt like my body was heavy and I couldn't control it at all. I stayed in bed even when mom told me to get up.
"Katelyn got up."
"I don't want to. I'm tired."
"Oh come on get up. We can have fun today."
"No mom. Please. I want to stay in bed. I'm tired and I want to stay here."
She left me alone and I curled up into a ball. I didn't feel like getting up or eating today. I just wanted to stay there. I decided to try and go back to sleep. After a while I fell asleep.

I was woken up by my mom calling me. I didn't get up. I tried to ignore it until I felt the bed shift and an arm wrap around me. I tried pretending I was asleep but I couldn't fool him.
"Oh come one Katelyn. I know you're not sleeping. I'm your father. I would know when my sweet daughter is awake or not."
"Dad?"
I turned around and my dad was there. I hugged him. I'm not gonna lie, I thought he was Daniel. I was hoping he was. I missed him. I haven't seen him in over four months.
"What are you doing here dad? I've missed you."
"I've missed you too. I decided to fight for your mom. I realized I love her and I want to be with her. I should've never left her."
"Aw dad, that's sweet. I don't know what to think about that. Mom seems happy being single but she sleeps in my room sometimes or Mia's so I think she misses having someone to cuddle with at night."
"Well I hope I can win her back. Then the only single one in this family will be you."
I laughed at him.
"What's so funny honey?"
"Dad Mia broke up with Brandon and I have a boyfriend."
"Since when?"
"Well Mia broke up with Brandon like six months ago and I've been together with my boyfriend for almost five months. His name is Daniel."
"I've missed a lot."
"Yeah but hopefully you won't miss more."
Dad smiled at me and left. I went back under the covers. I took a glance at my phone and saw 27 missed calls from Daniel. Yikes. And there were 28 text messages from him. Each one saying answer your phone :((( and one that said Good morning princess ♡
I put my phone back on the nightstand and stayed under my covers. I felt broken. I felt disgusted. I felt worthless. I let myself suffocate from the heat inside from under my blanket. I felt nothing from this. I was trying to go back to sleep when my mom called me again.
"Katelyn! Daniel's here!"
I decided not to get up and just stay here. I heard my door open and Daniel called out for me.
"Princess. It's me Daniel. Wake up."
I stayed in bed and stayed quiet.
"Wake up. How about I go tell your mom we're having tons of sex? Every time we go out."
I stayed down knowing he just wanted to win. I was going to give up.
"Don't want to wake up then I guess I'll go tell her. Maybe I'll add in some details. Maybe say we don't use condoms or something. Tell her I'm trying to be honest with her or something like that."
I heard his footsteps and I got scared. I got up from under the covers and leaped at him.
"Sarah. I have something to tell you."
"No! Don't do that!"
"That's what I thought. Why did you pretend to sleep?"
"I don't feel well."
"Is it your stomach? Do you have a fever?"
"I meant something else."
"Is it your period?"
"No. It's me. I don't feel well mentally."
"Do you want me to get your mom or something?"
"No, I just want to stay here."
"Did I do something? Is it about what you told me about on my birthday?"
"I don't know why. I just feel like I'm empty and like I'm not really all here."
"That's okay. I'll stay with you if you want."
"I want you here but I also want to be alone. When you're with me I always feel happy."
"I'll just stay here with you."
Daniel laid down on my bed and he hugged me. I felt my heart beat faster. I wrapped my arms around him. I felt him pull me closer to him. I smiled. He kissed my forehead. I was smiling like an idiot. I fell asleep in Daniel's arms. I felt safe having his arms around me.

I woke up and Daniel was gone. I felt kind of sad. He came out of the bathroom and came back to my bed.
"You're awake. Do you feel any better?"
"Yeah I think it's just you being here that makes me happy."
"So do I make you happier than your exes?"
"Of course you do. All of my exes were full of shit and didn't care about me."
"Do you mind telling me about one?"
"Well one of my exes said he was into me and he went out with me. After a month he dumped me and told everyone I had sex with him."
"Ouch that's gotta hurt."
"One of my other exes used me to get over their ex and when she finally took him back he fooled around with her while he was dating me. He was cheating on me for I think it was 2 months. He said I love you. He left me the next day after."
"That's brutal. I can hurt him for doing that to you. Only if you want of course."
"No, it's cool. It was last year. When we were juniors, I didn't really care anymore. Also, last year I dated one of my friends because we both liked each other but it didn't work out so he dumped me. We already knew we loved each other because we're close and we wanted the best for each other."
"How did it not work out?"
"I don't really know. It just didn't. The relationship didn't feel right. We both felt pressured to be in a relationship since we liked each other. That's what everyone was telling us. It was like the only thing people would tell me. 'Go out with him' 'just do it already.' We rushed into it."
"Oh. Do you feel like we rushed into it? Like we only went on two dates until I asked you but we were talking for a while."
"No, I don't feel like that. I made this decision on my own and I didn't feel pressured to date you."
"Have you ever had sex with anyone?"
"No."
"Really cause you sure know how to make out."
"Making out and have sex are two different things."
"Hmm yes but one leads to the other."
"Sorry if that made you uncomfortable, I was just curious. You can ask me anything if you want."
"Not it's okay I think I rather just ignore you" I said as I started walking over to the other side of the room
"Hey get back here!" He grabbed me and pulled me into him. I giggled at him. He kisses my forehead
Daniel pulled me down to my bed and laid me down next to him and he looked at me. He smiled. I smiled back at him.
"You're really pretty Katelyn. Like gorgeous."
"Pfft as if. I'm not pretty at all."
"Yes you are. What don't you like about yourself?"
"Well right now I don't like my body. I'm too skinny. I don't like how my face is a little round and my eyes are small. My facial features are average and boring. My eyes are boring and small. My hair is a mess. My lips are fine I guess. I wish I was a little bit taller."
"Yeah you are a little skinny but I'm going to fatten you up so don't worry about that. I like your face, it makes you look innocent and very cheerful. Your eyes are perfect and if you think they're too small that's because Katelyn, you're half Asian. They are so pretty and when they're in the sun your eyes look like pools of honey. Your hair is incredibly soft and a really pretty color. Your lips are so soft and kissable. And your smile can light up a dark room. I like you being this height. it's the perfect height for forehead kisses."
"I don't believe you. And I want to be taller. I don't want to be five foot three my whole life. I want to be at least two inches taller."
"If you were two inches taller then you wouldn't fit in my sweatshirts the way you like and I would have to buy bigger sweatshirts. And plus it's cute when you have to get on your tippy toes just to kiss me. If you were taller it wouldn't be cute anymore."
"You're right there. I love you"
"I love you too Katelyn."
Daniel kissed me and I smiled in between the kisses. Daniel broke off the kiss and he hugged me. I could hear his heartbeat and I put my hand on his chest. I felt him tense up and I softly giggled.
"We've been here all day. Don't you want to get up and do something?"
"Nope, I want to stay with you here."
Daniel got up from the bed and he dragged me off. I fell and hurt my butt.
"Ow. I hurt my butt. It hurts."
"I can kiss it better for you."
"As if Daniel."
I got up and I was hungry.
"Daniel. I'm hungry. Can you get me some food please?"
"Nope you gotta get up and get it yourself."
"Daniel, I don't want to. Please bring me some food. I love you."
"As much as I'm tempted. No. Now get up and take a shower and I'll take you out to eat."
"Fine. Only because my hair is greasy."
I got up and grabbed some clean clothes and went to the bathroom. I stepped into the shower and I started washing my hair when I heard the door open. I pulled back the curtain a little and I saw Daniel. He had his eyes covered. He blushed when he accidentally grabbed my bra. I laughed quietly when he blushed. I yelled at him for coming into the bathroom.
"Daniel! What are you doing? Get out."
"I just came here to tell you to hurry up or else I'm leaving."
'Okay I'm almost done just get out."
He got out and I hurried and finished washing my hair. I put my clothes on and blow dried my hair and straightened it. I put on some makeup and Daniel walked in. I was wearing a pretty basic outfit. A blue sweatshirt and black leggings with checkered Vans
"You don't need to wear makeup if you're beautiful with or without it."
"You've never seen me without makeup."
"Yes I have. Just a while ago when we were sleeping. You weren't wearing any makeup."
"Oh yeah you're right. I'm still wearing makeup because I like it and I feel like I look ugly without it on."
"Not true but if you like it, go for it. It only enhances your natural beauty."
I finished and Daniel drove us to some nearby Korean BBQ place. It looked good and I was hungry.
"Do you know how to cook the meat because I don't."
"How are you 18 and don't know how to cook meat?"
"I don't know, I've never learned. Don't be mean to me Katelyn."
We ate our food and we left. Daniel took me to a nearby store to hang out for a while until I felt a little better. We were being weird in the book section when a random guy came up to me. He smacked my ass and put his arm around my waist.
"Hey baby. Can I get your number and maybe take you to dinner?"
Daniel overheard and answered for me. He put his arm around me and pulled me towards him.
"Actually she already has a boyfriend so get your hands off of her."
"Why should I?"
"I'm her boyfriend so get lost."
"Or what? What are you gonna do fag?"
"Oh you really want to take that chance with me."
"Yeah I'd like to see you try."
Daniel punched the guy giving him a bloody nose.
"Daniel! Babe just drop it. It's not worth it."
I grabbed his arm. I blushed at how muscular he was. I never thought he was like this. I knew he played football but never expected him to be like this. He always looked soft but I guess that's what happens when you wear hoodies. I could tell he flinched when I touched him.
"You're lucky my girlfriend's here to stop me from doing anything else."
We walked away. I frowned at Daniel's actions. It made me happy that he was protecting me and it showed how much he loved me but I hated fighting.
"You didn't have to punch the guy."
"Hey he was looking at MY girlfriend and he insulted me so I did what any boyfriend would do."
"Yeah but you know how I feel about fighting."
"I'm sorry but it made me mad that he spoke to you in that way and touched you. I know you don't like being touched. Especially having your butt smacked."
"Yeah I know. I just feel like you could've handled it better but I'm happy you're protective. It shows that you care about me."
Daniel smiled at me and kissed me. I kissed him back and pulled away. We continued looking for books and I got three books. Daniel paid for them which he probably shouldn't have because it was expensive. Daniel took me home and walked me to my doorstep.
"Thank you for making me feel better. It meant a lot to me."
"Of course Katelyn. You know I'd do anything for you because I love you."
"Goodnight Daniel. I love you and I want you to bring me one of your hoodies tomorrow. I want to wear one."
"Goodnight Katelyn. I love you too and yeah I'll bring you one."
We shared a kiss. It was passionate until we got interrupted by my dad. He coughed.
"Katelyn you have a visitor waiting for you in the living room."
"Oh well goodnight Daniel. I'll see you in the morning."
"Goodnight Katelyn and nice to meet you Mr.Park."
"Christian is fine. Goodnight Daniel. Drive safely."
"Thank you sir. Have a good night."
Daniel left and I went inside. Who was it? It was probably Rose or Julie. I was wrong. It was him. It was Brian. He was sitting on my couch. I felt terrified. I don't want him here.
"Hey Katelyn."
"Brian. What are you doing here?"
"Katelyn! That's no way to speak to a guest."
"I'm sorry dad I'm really tired and I want to go to bed."
"Bed? It's only 8:30 pm and if you are tired you would've come back sooner instead of being out late with Daniel. Sorry Brian."
"It's okay, no hard feelings. Mr.Park is it okay if we go up to Katelyn's room? We have to finish our science project."
"Yeah go ahead. I don't mind."
Fuck. Dad why are you so stupid. I spoke to my dad in Korean.
"Dad tell him to leave. Say something about me not being able to have a boy in my room."
"That would be weird because I'm pretty sure you and Daniel are in your room more than just today and as much as it pains me to say I know you guys have done more than just cuddle before"
"Dad! No we haven't done it before but still. I don't want him here."
"I'm not telling him to leave, it's rude and that's final."
"Fine."
"Uh Brian my room is upstairs. Follow me."
I feel weird about this. I don't have a science project. And especially not with him. He doesn't even have the same science class as me. And I'm not just talking about class periods. I mean I take college courses and he takes 10th grade science. Physics to be exact.
We walked into my room and he closed the door after he walked in. He sat down on my bed. I told him I needed to change into comfortable clothes. He obviously got excited but then looked disappointed when I came out of the bathroom wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt.
"Why do you wear baggy clothes? You have a nice body. You should show it off."
"Because I like these types of clothes. And the only person that will ever see my body is my boyfriend when I'm ready."
"I saw it though and it was nice. I still see your ass in those sweats so I guess it's fine."
I ignored his comment. I was trying to make him bored.
"So what do you want Brian because you're obviously not here for a science project and we're not friends."
"I need an excuse to see you?"
"Yes. The only people that don't need an excuse are my family, friends and my boyfriend."
"Are you still with him?"
"Yeah. I love him so of course I'm still with him. So what are you doing here?"
"Just wanted to see you."
"Well I don't want to see you and I need to text my boyfriend telling him how I'm doing right now"
"You can tell him you're doing me."
"Ew. I love my boyfriend and I would never do that to him."
"Ugh. Stop talking about your boyfriend. It's such a turn off."
"Oh is it?"
"Yes it is."
"Well I love him so much. He's so cute and kind to me. His lips are really soft and he's always buying me gifts. He's this incredible person. He's so respectful."
"Stop. I'm leaving, seeing as how you don't want me here."
"You're right I don't want you here. And you know what's a turn off. Knowing that you raped me and that I can't have sex because I'm scared to."
"I didn't rape you. You wanted it."
"No I didn't. I continuously said no. I kept screaming ''how is that wanting it?"
"Oh come on, your body said a different thing."
"So what did my body say then?"
"Don't act like you don't know you are grinding up against me and your body is hot."
"I wasn't grinding up against you. I was trying to push you off and stop saying that type of shit."
He leaned in and he started kissing me. It was just like last time. I tried pushing him off. It didn't work.
"Oh come on Katelyn. Don't play hard to get and just have fun with me."
"No get off. I don't want this."
He continued kissing me. He started lifting my shirt. He grabbed me the same way as before. Hurting me. My dad walked into my room. He saw that Brian had one of his hands around my two wrists and the other wrapped around my waist and how I was struggling and he pushed him off. I could see the anger in my dad's eyes.
"Get off of my daughter! And get out of my house you fucking bastard!."
Brian ran out of my room. I heard the front door slam. My dad ran up to me.
"Sweetie, I'm so sorry that I didn't listen to you. I didn't know he would do that. Are you okay?"
"I'm fine dad. I just want to go to bed."
Dad left and I crawled under my covers. He was really gonna do it again. He didn't care. I heard my phone buzz and I left where it was. My phone kept going off but I just ignored it. I have school tomorrow. I felt terrible. How could I let this happen again? I locked my door and I took out my blade that I kept in my paint box. I moved it so that it would be harder to get in case I would try to do it again. It obviously didn't work. I started cutting. I did it on my arm. I didn't care at this point if someone could see it. I let them bleed out and I cleaned them up. I wrapped my arm in some bandages and went to sleep. No one ever checks up on me during the night so it didn't matter. I'm such an idiot. I should've fought harder to get him to leave. How did he find out where I live? I'm not safe anymore. He knows where I live and I'm sure he'll stop at nothing to do it to me again.
I slowly drifted off to sleep.

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