hostage || l.t ✔️

eighty eight

listen to this while reading

London Reed
"It's good news...that's what," he said, standing between my legs. I furrow my brows and look at the paper and he sighs. "I um..."

"What's wrong? If it's good news then I'll be happy," I smile but he doesn't smile. My smile fades and I sit up a bit, and he sighs. "Louis.." I whisper, confused.

"Um.." he looks at the paper. "You just need to sign this,"

"What? Why?" I furrow my brows. He puts the paper down and eyes scan the paper. He's already filled it out it looks like. I widen my eyes as I read it.

I Louis Tomlinson have full ownership of London Reed and I wish the send them became where they came from because I no longer need her.

I snap my head up to him and he bubbles on his lip and looks down. "What.." I furrow my brows. "It says you don't need me...are you...letting me go?" I feel my skin crawl at the words.

He doesn't answer, and the house runs silent. He finally nods softly and refuses to look up at me. I widen my eyes and grin, looking back at the paper. "Wait...why?"

"Because..." he says.

"You don't need me? What does that mean?"

"It's not that I don't need you," he finally looks up at me and he looks sad. "Of course I need you but—"

"Then why did you put it there?"

"I can't say that you don't deserve anything that I've done to you, or anyone else, can I?"

I flick my eyes over his, bouncing between his. "Louis...what is going on? Can you talk to me?" I murmur, putting the paper down and I cup his jaw so he looks at me.

"I'm letting you go," he said and I freeze. "Because this world isn't right for you, and I've come to realise that this isn't what you deserve. You deserve to be happy with someone else, and be with your friends,"

I part my lips slightly. "You're...letting me go?"

"Yes," he nods. "Just sign it, please," he begs.

"But...I am happy here,"

His eyes close and he shakes his head. "No," he says shakily. "No you're not," he continues to shake his head. "You like the idea of being happy here,"

"You don't know what I am,"

"London," he says shakily. "Please...I'm letting you go," he smiles and cups my jaw now.

"But I don't want too," I shake my head. He tucks hair behind my ear. He leans closer, and presses his lips to mine ever so softly and it makes my heart kinda break.

"Go love your life, Lon," he smiles, speaking so softly. I breathe shakily and shake my head.

"No—"

"Yes," he cuts me off. "Please.." he says shakily.

"Why do you want me gone?" I cross my arms. "Is that why you were so gentle with me last night? Because you knew it was our supposedly 'last night'?" he inhaled from my words. "That meant so much to me and I can't even explain it," I add.

"I know..okay? But..I want you to live your life and you can't do that if I'm keeping you hostage here,"

"You're not Louis," I shake my head. "I like living with you," I smile.

"I've hurt you to much," he shakes his head and so do I.

"Louis...You have not,"

"It may not always be physically but I've said things to you I regret, okay?" he breathes. "I just want you to go back home, where you can be with Will, and be friends with your friends again, I know you want that," he says and he's right, I do want it.

"I do Louis..but I want to be here with you too,"

"No," he shakes his head, and grabs my hands. "I want you to leave...not because I'm a prick but because I feel selfish for keeping you here, you deserve everything and I can't give you that," he shakes his head. "You should go back to Will, and love him like you do, I know your capable of it, and hopefully one day you can have your own family, with someone who wants one,"

I felt my eyes sting. "What about you?"

"What about me?"

"You once told me that you're on borrowed time," I whisper and he shrugs.

"It doesn't matter, sign it and you're free to go. You won't have me telling you what to do, you won't have to worry about getting punished, you won't have to worry about anything...and that's why I'm letting you go. Because you don't deserve what this world has to offer,"

I close my eyes and tears drip from them. I appreciate what he's doing and I see why, but I want him. I don't even care about anything else right now, I just want to stay with him.

I know he's not the type to have his own kids one day, or fall in love with anyone because that's just who he is but I'm willing to give that up for him. I've been so close to him these past few weeks and I can't get him off my mind.

But of course I want to be with my mom, my friends, my brothers and everyone I miss, and he's letting me get that back. But why didn't I want to leave him? I wanted to stay with him, because without him I'm just living in black and white, and I want to stay in colour.

But this is my chance to go back to my family and friends. I think I should take it, but it's going to leave a hole inside of me that no one's ever gonna fill in.

"Okay.." I whisper and his eyes close. His lips crash into mine and I wrap my arms around his neck. He wraps his arms around me, squeezing me into him so I was pressing into him. He pulls away and we hug, swaying from side to side, and I inhale deeply and his cologne and natural sit in my nose.

He pulls away and a tear rolls down my cheek. "Don't cry," he pouts. "Be happy,"

"But..I'm doing something I don't particularly want,"

"Just think of the good of this, it'll get better," he smiles, handing me the pen. I turn around and he holds my hips from behind and presses himself against me, putting his lips against my hair. I do my signature and when it was done, he takes the paper and holds it in his hand, and I spin around.

"So..." he looks at it. "Feel any better?"

Of course U was excited to see my family and friends but I was going to miss him so much. "I don't care if you think it's cringe, but I'm gonna miss you,"

He smiles and blushes and I smile back, before we both snicker. I kiss him this time and I felt my eyes water, because I don't know if we will ever kiss again after today.

"You can keep Cherry," he smiles into the kiss, keeping his forehead on mine. "And make sure you cover this," he pulls my naturally waved hair over my neck to cover the hickey he gave me last night.

"Thank you..Louis, for everything," I smile.

"Don't thank me," he whispers and I giggle. "Fuck it, I'm gonna miss you too," he smiles and I pout.

"Yeah?"

He nods with a grin and I grin back. "Aw, Louis,"

"Shut up," he rolls his eyes. "Go get the stuff you wanna keep,"

"Just Cherry," I shake my head, and the clothes I was wearing. He sighs and pulls away. "Every time I listen too John Wayne, I'll think of you," I smile.

"Don't let me take up all your thoughts," he shakes his head.

"I have a hundred through tes and your ninety-nine of them," I smile and he blushes.

"Feelings mutual," he smiles back.

God I was going to miss him so much. But I need to be grateful he's willing to let me go.

//
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