You're not alone

Complicated feelings

It's been two weeks since I'm friends with Yuto and I really enjoy his company. I am not talking to a wall, I'm not feeling embarrassing for my artist ideas and my preferences. He is making me laugh! That's unsual! He is helping me with sketch and I help him with some of his homework. I'm actually pretty surprised by that, I met someone in school who is like me. Unexpected as fuck

Today is Saturday and I'm planning to ask him to hangout on my house. I want to ask him to watch a movie together, probably an animated one. He likes them a lot, he even draws sometimes anime characters. I will make popcorn and some smoothies, I can even teach him how to play cards! Hold on a second, am I being too excited? Well I guess I haven't felt like this since when I first met my best friend but now I feel all my emotions too much. Ok, time to call!
It's calling...

~H-hello?..~

- Hi Yuto, how're you doing?

~H-hi Himari... I'm good, how 'bout you?.."

- Well.. I'm good. You know... I was wondering if you'd like to come over my house and watch a movie. I'm pretty bored and I want to spend some time with you

~Ohhh.... Me...? You sure.?

- Of course silly! Do you wanna?

~Yes, yes... Of course..!~

- Ok I'm gonna send you my address, see ya then.

I hang up the phone and I immediately send him my address. Oh god, he said yes!!! Why am I being so excited!!?? Now I have to clean up...... Oh shit...

**Time skip**

Ahhh it's over!!! Time to relax until he comes. I think it is gonna rain, maybe I should call him to not come? Nah it's ok, in that case he can stay here. I have stayed at my best friend's house a lot of times because it was raining, what's the difference?

** Door bell**

He is here! I run to the door and I can't wait to see him and have fun with him. That's it, I'm opening

- Hi Yuto!

- H-hi Himari..

- Come on, get in!

- T-thanks..

He gets in and he takes off his shoes. I have to say that he still is too much "uwu" but I don't mind it anymore, actually I find it cute- WAIT WHAT!?

- So Himari... W-what would you like to watch?

- Oh, uhm I was thinking of watching an animated movie, how about "Garden of woods"?

- Oh! Yes! I really appreciate Makoto Shinkay's pieces of work

- Nice, now sit and I'm gonna make some popcorn

He nods and I'm going to the kitchen and turn on the popcorn machine. It's weird but I feel a small smile on my face and I can't stop it. I feel my heart beating fast and I don't understand why, I'm his friend and I'm probably overeating on this. The only thing that makes me worry is that I have never felt like this, even when I met my best and only friend.

The popcorn is ready and I'm going back to the living room. He is just sitting on the couch checking in his phone something. Should I stop him and talk to him? Here goes nothing

- Popcorn is ready, time to watch.

I open the TV, I get in my Netflix account and I put the movie. I place the bowl of popcorn between me and him and he smiles softly. The movie starts and he looks so freaking focused, I'm sure he is studying in his mind the art style of the movie. I keep watching the movie with him and the sound of biting popcorn is making the situation more comfortable for me

- I think it's raining..

-What?

I look out of the window and I see a dark, clouding sky and the streets wet. I might was too focused on the movie I guess. But I have to admit that I was also focused on him. I hope this is what I should do with a friend, it's been really long time since the last time...

- I think I should leave, I don't want be a burden of you..

- Oh shut up you're not, you can even sleep here if you want to.

- Y-YOU MEAN IT!?

- Yes, why wouldn't I?

- B-BECAUSE I'M A BOY AND YOU'RE A GIRL AND YOU KNOW... IT'S JUST WEIRD..

- Well not for me. Plus you're just my friend

- And your parents? Do they agree too?

- I live by my own since I was eleven years old. My parents had divorced when I was five and my mother died of cancer. Positive life huh?

- Your father..?

- I don't know, I haven't seen him for a while...

That was a lie but I think it's too soon to tell him the truth

- D-don't worry, it's ok. You know I might be living with my parents but... I'm also alone...

- What do you mean?

- Well let's say I am not having the supportive parents like our classmates or whatever... I grew up totally alone while I wasn't...

So that's the reason, he is alone... He grew up with it. He was even in distance with his own parents. And in the end I'm saying that my life is a disaster.

- Is this the reason that you're alone? Because since the day you born you're alone?

- No... Not actually. That's the reason I am being so shy, if that counts, to everyone.

- I see... I'm sorry about that, please stay here, do it for me. I don't want to leave you alone now..

- Aw, Himari... I am not alone... I'm having you and as long as I have you on my side then I am not alone..

He says that while he pulls me into a hug and he smiles. I feel something on my chest, a warmth that it's not like the one when you get into your house after a cold day. It's like when I was with my mother and she gave me big hugs whenever I was sad... It's the heart warmth. But that's a sight of a friendship huh? Yes, it is of course... But if that's a sight of friendship too, then why I haven't felt like tgis before?
Holy shit that's not a fucking friendship...