on the verge

Chapter 4

 You sat in the noodle shop holding looking over the menu squinting ever so slightly at it reaching to adjust your glasses, finally, you picked an item and paid for it totally not playing with your chopsticks while you waited.

The bowl was set in front of you before you realized and a grin spread across your face pulling the bowl closer and shoving a bite into your mouth. Oh- OH! this was the best thing you had eaten since you had gotten here! And you started to wolf down the bowl only slowing enough you wouldn't choke it was amazing a pure moment of nothing but warmth homeyness and joy. You didn't even notice your tail slipping out to wag.

It was nice listening to the hustle and bustle of the shop the noodles that were heaven in your mouth. Everything seemed perfect almost too perfect cracking open your eyes you find you find you finished the bowl of noodles, and huh guess you understood tang from the show and his obsession with the noodles. It almost felt like you were home again you forgot you weren't there and never would. You quickly shoved your hands into your pockets

"Thank you for the food" you left the shop in a rush tears starting to prick at your eyes balling your fists so you could feel the prick of your claws, your very not human claws. You wanted to go home.

You barely remembered entering the place you stayed at eyes blurred by tears as a hiccup hit you and you curled against the door squeezing your eyes shut. All you wanted was to see your little sibling again, your mom your dad, even if they bothered you, right now you just wanted to hear your mom call you but your phone was long dead and didnt even work in this world. You tried to remember your family's faces only to sob harder as you realized you were forgetting what they looked like. Just like that the flood of emotions that you had been putting off since you arrived in this world broke the fragile dam you had constructed.

Your body shook the couch ripped where you dug your claws into it as you barely kept yourself from screaming. You hate that it was a bowl of noodles that caused this as you curled into a tiny ball chest aching as you choked on your sobs.

"Why didn't I just DIE?! WHY AM I HERE?! I WANT MY FAMILY" the words were spoken to no one, but it's not like you had anyone to talk to anymore you didnt even know where in the timeline you were anymore. Why not just try to get involved with the plot maybe you could get crushed by a building and go back home.

The answer was simple you were a coward. That is why you couldn't just walk out into the street and why you kept trying to survive despite everything.

You hated yourself.

not the best look for anyone in this moment it seemed and you happened to be the one wearing that look