Better Than The Best

1-9

Y/n sat on her couch reading a book Anita recommended while she waited for 11 A.M. It was girls' weekend, but Anita had some... business to take care of before she could join you. Via was jumping on the couch in excitement while she waited for Bruce to wake up from his nap. She jumped on the remote, changing it to the news when something caught your attention.

"Now! On MSNBC-News! The Brutal Blonde Strikes again! This time stealing Princess Diana's prized necklace at 3:42 this morning! Authorities say that the police have caught up to her, but the possibility of them retrieving the necklace is slim. Will these horrible villains never be stopped? This is just in, live footage of the chase- what's going on Bryce? " The man asked looking straight at the camera.

You chuckled glancing up at your book while they showed a woman with long blonde hair speeding down the highway on her purple bike, wearing her signature lavender latex suit. You had specially designed for a friend that was mysteriously stolen, as well as the rest of the collection, during shipping weeks before the Brutal Blonde made her debut.

"Well, Hank, The Brutal Blonde just made her way off of the highway and onto the city streets. She has the case containing Princess Diana's necklace strapped to the back of her bike. Look over there! Five police cars are blocking the only exit she has, the rest are in pursuit." The man said loudly so he could be heard over the blades of the helicopter.

The video zoomed in, seeing the case detach itself from the bike as she made a sharp turn into a closed parking garage. Doing a wheelie, she broke the metal shield, narrowly getting away. The newsman started to speak, but you changed the channel back to TLC.

"And I broke up with her... eight times... over text..." The egg-shaped man started.

You looked at the screen with wide eyes, "No fucking way!"

The elevator dinged, and Anita walked in with her bike helmet and case in hand, " What did I miss?"

She sat down, posing for her Polaroid that Nefario got her for her birthday, "he just confessed to how he broke up with her eight times over text."

Anita shook the picture, "No fucking way!"

You looked at her, "That's what I said!"

The show came on after commercials, "Shawn, I was hurt. She hurt me."

"But there were posts of you the next night at the club with very young girls?" A cast member asked, looking at the nasty man.

"Well, that was then. Now, I'm in therapy and I'm healing and becoming a better person." The man tried to justify his situation.

"So, you're getting along mighty fine with your, older man." You chuckled as she took another photo.

"And? You know I have a thing for older, brilliant men." You gagged mentally.

"So, now you're open to talking about him?" Anita shrugged.

"I don't see why not." She smirked, "So what about you and Gru, all you've told me is that he kissed you."

"Well, he's not pursuing villainy anymore. He's decided that for the girl's safety, he's going to be starting a new business." You handed her a juice box as another cast member started an argument.

"-with your sugar babies!" The man yelled as the other people joined in.

"Oh, has he decided yet?" Anita sipped her juice box, watching the TV as it showed all of them yelling.

"No, not yet. Though I'm trying to be as supportive as I can, we haven't talked in a bit, but it's because he's been busy" You handed her the bowl of cheese puffs.

"Oh yeah, the girls are starting school this week, yeah?" Anita grabbed a handful, munching away.

"Yeah, he's even got Nefario on "grandfather" duties." you looked at her laughing, "he must have told you all about it, isn't that right, grandma?"

Anita looked at you, about to react before she smiled, "You know, I just love those saggy- "

"Ahh! No! Please, spare my ears!" You covered them as she went into very specific detail as to what she and Nefario did Friday night.

You gagged, trying not to vomit, "Please-"

Anita laughed, "Fine, alright, alright. Stop being so dramatic. Get ready for lunch, I'll be in the bathroom changing. Be glad I didn't read you Vector's diary. We found it when rescuing Bruce."

She motioned to the shark that was currently snuggled up with your squid, "That's gotta be some kind of weird, right? I mean, a shark sexually and romantically involved with a squid. I'm not gonna lie, that scares me."

You shivered, feeling the goosebumps rise, "I try not to think about it."

-.-

"Hello Mother, the girls are waiting for you in the backyard for teatime, I'm just making the finger sandwiches and waiting for Edith's peach tea to finish brewing. Anita, her psychologist, says that giving the girls options will make them feel safer." Gru said, turning around in his pink apron.

"Ah, yes, Y/n's friend, isn't that, right?" She sighed, sitting on the stool on the counter, watching him make snacks for his girls.

Gru nodded as she continued, "That's something I wanted to talk to you about... don't you think that Y/n is too good to be with you? I mean, look at her, one of the most famous people in the world."

Gru turned around as his mother continued to speak, "She's wealthy, successful, and beautiful. It seems a little too good to be true, doesn't it? You can't offer anything in a relationship like that. There's nothing you could give her that she can't give herself."

His mother watched his expression, "I just don't want you to make a mistake and get hurt."

Gru turned off the squealing kettle and poured it into the glass pot, "Mother, thank you for your concern, but we'll figure this thing out on our own."

She nodded, "I just hope you know what you're doing." And with that she hopped off the stool, "I'll see you outside."

Gru stood in the kitchen, taking his apron off to finish taking the snacks outside, thinking about his mother's words.

Status: Edited {1}