The Diary of a Romantically and Gender Confused Asexual

14 May, 2015 / 34 Months, 5 Days Until I'm Eighteen

So a few minutes ago I was watching How I Met Your Mother, Season Nine, Episode 21 Gary Blauman, and basically this episode Ted's telling a story to Tracy about how everyone was fighting over whether Gary Blauman should be invited to Barney and Robin's wedding. And they just spend their whole date holding hands, walking, and talking. And I realized that I want that. I want someone to walk around the whole city with me just talking, not in a romantic way, I just want someone to do that. I miss deep conversations and feeling trusting enough to someone to tell them things.

Honestly I just miss being invited to hang out with people. I gave up on trying when I tried to hang out with someone all summer and into the beginning of this school year only to be declined every time. And even if I do hang out with people I always do something totally embarrassing that I honestly don't even want to write here. (But if you guess it I'll tell you if you guessed correctly.)

Idk I just feel kinda alone right now. And I keep thinking of Him, you know who. I just want to talk to him more and be friends again. I miss being able to talk to him almost more than my old friends from grade school. I wish I knew how to get him talking to me again...

Anyway, there's this new girl in my school, and god to I want her to SIT SOMEWHERE ELSE AT LUNCH. She brings over all of these annoying guys to our table and I'm DONE with them. I'd be fine if she brought the "normal" guys over, but no, she brings over jack-off and squeaky. UGH.

Also that picture's awesome, right? It's my grandma's cat and I was just so proud of it I wanted someone to share it with.

Well okay Imma go watch FNAF because it gives me zombie apocalypse dreams (I have no idea why but they do) and zombie apocalypse dreams are fun (even though someone always does and I get sad everytime). Goodbye!