Unsaid emotions blossom between two boys, Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan, in school, but they are being pulled apart by the seeds of hatred growing in each other's hearts due to Jiang Zhuocheng.
Ten years later, Yibo knocks on the door of Zhan's heart to h...
Zhan feels anxious as his eyes constantly shift toward Cheng, who appears lost in his thoughts, pacing around the room with blood-stained fists from repeatedly slamming them against the walls. He can sense the tension rising in the air, his heart pounding in his chest as he struggles to find the right words to calm him down. He knows that one wrong move could set Cheng off even more, and the fierce fire burning within him raises the stakes even higher.
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He feels everything! He feels the years wearing on their bones and muscles every day; their bodies have been through hell and back in the last ten years. Their hearts and souls have probably been through more. Most importantly, his!
He is haunted by Yibo relentlessly, even when they are apart. In some way or another, Yibo has always been present in his life, like a voice echoing in the depths of his mind, sometimes distracting him and other times forcing him to confront uncomfortable truths about himself. Zhan has never really been alone, after all. It's as if they are forever intertwined, destined to be a part of each other's lives no matter how hard they try to move on.
Zhan opens his mouth to say something, but Cheng shakes his head and steps up, wrapping his massive arms wordlessly around him and pressing him to his chest. They don't have time to talk after leaving the diner, so Zhan feels it is a reaction of apology for letting him be alone with Ji Li.
"I'm stupid, Zhan. I should have been by your side, but I wasn't. It's my mistake!" Cheng murmurs, stomping his foot heavily on the floor.
Shaking his head in disagreement, Zhan refuses to release Cheng from the bear hug. He clings desperately to him, realizing that forgiveness and understanding are more important than blame and regret. "It's not your mistake. It's my fate!" he declares solemnly.
Cheng's heart aches at Zhan's words, overwhelmed by a mixture of guilt and sadness that washes over him. He shakes his head and allows Zhan to slip a little out of his arms so that he can look him in the eyes. They both have brown eyes, but his are slightly darker than Zhan's caramel-brown ones. "It's not your fate. It's his fate to get into my hands again. I'm damn sure I will kill him if he tries to reach you again," he growls.
"Oh, my..." Zhan shakes his head in disbelief, unsure of how to process the information. He doesn't know how he needs to feel about it. "Just try to forget about it," he says, gently releasing Cheng and giving him a reassuring pat on the chest. He doesn't want Cheng to see the mixed emotions he's feeling; luckily, his brother remains oblivious.
Only Zhan knows the truth locked away deep in his soul, and perhaps it is the reason he always feels more distressed than he can admit.
***
While Zhan goes for a hot shower, Cheng blasts the music on high volume and starts hitting the wall again, this time with a shout of frustration, and he almost doesn't hear the door open and close. He looks back, his eyes flaring, ready to scare off whoever is stupid enough to disturb him. He sees Peixin leaning against the doorjamb and clasping his hands together.
"Are you feeling better? Have you let it all out?" Peixin asks in a droning voice, causing Cheng's sore fists to clench again at his sides. "Well, I know who he is!"
"Fuck off, Peixin," Cheng bites out, but Peixin saunters into the room toward him.
"Why are you getting disturbed this much?" Peixin asks, looking around the room to gather the mess and noticing Cheng's wounded fists. He shakes his head, inching closer with deliberate slowness, each step laden with caution, a sense of impending confrontation thick in the air.
"You know well," Cheng growls, unwilling to discuss it further.
"Why do we have to worry about it? Our Zhan is beta, not an omega, to care about it." Peixin tries to make some sense of it, not knowing the reality. As he notices the silence in Cheng, his mind starts to work out something, which makes him think. "Or are you hiding...?"
Cheng cuts off Peixin's rambling by yelling, "Hit me." Just destroying everything doesn't work out, so he hopes it will calm his nerves a little and make him think about something he wants to do next.
"What? Are you mad?" Peixin yells. He walks over to Cheng and pushes him hard in the chest. "Just calm down, Cheng." In his hands, he can feel Cheng pumping, fighting to get air into the lungs.
Peixin takes a step back, trying to think of another way to defuse the situation. "Well, I'm going," he says, throwing his hands in the air. He knows that getting Cheng to calm down is crucial at this moment of high tension, so letting him alone is best. "I'll see you later," he says, making his way to the door.
Cheng has no idea how or when he grabs the vase and hurls it at the door, as Peixin is about to step out. The vase shatters against the door with a loud crack, falling apart into pieces. "Please," he pleads, his desperation evident in his voice. "Hit me."
Peixin abruptly stops his movement as he witnesses the vase shattering in front of him by the door. The shock is evident on his face as he turns to face Cheng. His hands tremble, and he clenches his fists to suppress the shaking. He knows he has to do this. "I'm sorry, Cheng," he says, lowering his voice as he raises his fist and forcefully strikes him in the face. The impact is strong, and he can almost sense the pain radiating through his fingers.
Cheng stumbles, holding his face, and luckily, he doesn't trip over something or fly through the window. "Come on," he encourages Peixin, wanting to get beaten hard some more.
Rather than feeling intimidated, Peixin is now surprised by Cheng's actions. However, he quickly decides not to hesitate and retaliates by pushing Cheng away and delivering a powerful blow to his stomach. He continues to unleash a series of punches, striking Cheng in the face and causing his nose to bleed.
Disoriented, Cheng loses his balance and falls flat on the floor. Filled with concern, Peixin immediately rushes over to check on him and asks, "Are you okay?"
Instead of replying, Cheng's brows furrow as he looks up at Peixin's boots before locking eyes with Zhan, whose light brown eyes widen in horror. Then tears begin to stream down his face, catching him by surprise, while Zhan kneels beside him with tears of his own. He winces in pain as his little brother gently brushes away the blood from his nose and sobs heavily alongside him.
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"I can't lose you!" Zhan bends down and presses his face against Cheng's chest with dry sobs. He can't imagine a world without Cheng by his side. Holding onto him tightly, he fights with his breath and wails in despair.
Cheng hates it for unknowingly being the reason for Zhan's crying, but instead, that deep burning flares back up again, getting on his nerves. It's not to hurt his little brother. It's not his little brother's punishment. It's punishment for him to let that stupid moment happen in Zhan's life again.