I SAW SANTA KILL SOMEONE

CH: 14 It's his loss

CH: 14 It's his loss

(Ji-Cheol)

While Celeste and I ate lunch, we discussed random things and anything our minds came to.

We took the Christmas tree and house decorations out of the downstairs closet when we finished eating.

Christmas music played around the cabin; we decorated the Christmas tree and talked.

"So, not to make this awkward, but you know the clothes you gave me? I appreciate you doing that, and they're all comfortable, but what is up with the boxer's sizes?" I asked her.

Why? Because I wanted to diss her ex in every way and chance I could. I will diss him out because he didn't deserve her. He's lucky I'm too busy spending the holidays with her, or I would have shown up in front of his door.

"Sorry, was the size too small? I ordered it for someone else." She said in a low voice; she avoided eye contact as she placed an ornament on the tree.

"Damn, even you knew the size was too small," I said, holding back a laugh.

"Guess I didn't have to say it," I said, laughing.

She didn't say anything, which caused me to look at her; she had a smirk on her face but was shaking her head.

"Well, you two have different body frames, so I assumed." She said. I nodded my head and smiled.

"You assumed right; you know there's a stereotype about Asian men being small. I guess it's been proven wrong this time. What ethnicity was he? Your ex?" I asked her.

"Uh, he was black." She said.

"Damn, that's really sad," I said, putting some decorative ornaments on the tree.

"Well, I guess things happen for a reason. I guess the relationship he is in now would be a better use for it." She said bitterly.

"Can I be frank?" I ask.

"You've been frank since the moment I met you. I don't think you can be any other way but honest. So, yes, you can." She said, causing me to chuckle again.

I'm always finding myself amused by her.

"I think you're too good and always were too good for him. A prick like that is worthless, and I know what he did was fuck up. Trust me, it's beyond fucked up what he did, but he doesn't deserve you. It might be hard for you to move on, especially with the number of years you were with him, but you will be able to move on and hopefully meet someone better." I said, being honest.

I'm not trying to tell her it'll be easy, that she will suddenly come across the right person for her, but it's worth not giving up and worth looking forward to.

Hopefully, someone who's packing down there and has a beautiful personality also enjoys cooking because this woman loves to eat from the way she enjoys the food I make.

She smiled as she stopped what she was doing to look at me.

"Thanks, that means a lot. I needed to hear that." She said.

"Of course, well. I'm glad I was the one who was able to tell you. It's the truth, so don't worry. The right one will come." I said, sounding enthusiastic about it.

"What about you?" She asked me.

"What about me?" I asked, raising a brow.

"Have you tried dating?" She asked.

I chuckled and shook my head.

"No, I have not tried dating, it would be hard to date with the line of work I do, and it would also be dangerous for the person. I don't think I could put someone through that." I said to her softly.

"I also can't just go around telling people what I do, so it would be hard to keep something like that a secret from someone, especially someone I am in a relationship with," I said, as I put the star on top of the Christmas tree.

"I understand what you mean about that, but what if you were able to tell that person because you trusted them and what if they were somehow fine with what you do? Would you still be willing to date and build a relationship with them?" She asked me.

I took a minute to think about it.

"Hmm, do you think there is someone out there willing to date someone like me with the things I do? It's dangerous; they will have to sign up for a life they're not used to." I said, shrugging; there is no chance of someone ever being willing to do something like that.

Not for someone like me.

"What if you were to quit what you do? I'm not saying you should but have you considered it?" She asked me.

"No, I haven't; the reason is that there's a lot of bad people out there, there's a lot of people who want justice for things that have happened to them or their loved ones.

Especially when the law and justice system has failed them, or people who feel like they're untouchable, you know, the ones who can get away with their crimes. I deal with those people for my clients, so I can never quit doing what I'm doing. I might somehow manage to do two things, something else that I love as a cover-up, but I wouldn't be able to quit doing this." I said, taking a step back to look at the tree.

We were done decorating it, and I smiled at how our hard work looked.

"So you don't think you'll ever meet someone who'll accept this side of you?" She asked. I turned my head to look at Celeste.

I shook my head and sighed.

"No, it's not exactly a turn, and asking someone to be able to deal with this side of me is selfish. I wouldn't want to force someone to deal with that, and if they ended up wanting to be with me, regardless of everything, then I guess I would count that as a miracle and hold on to that person forever because things like that don't just happen and they shouldn't be taken for granted when they do." I said to her.

"I think you're someone who would love to have a family one day. I can see it. You fit the image, and I think you would love to spend the holidays with them too." She said. I stood there silent, not saying anything.

Not telling her that it has been my dream since I was a kid, not telling her that it's something that I've secretly wanted and still do.

There's no way I could tell someone that. It's something that I've never even voiced out loud to anyone.

"I think you would be great at it. I can see it." She said, smiling at me.

"Yeah, that would be nice," I said.

"So, what do you think of our tree?" I asked her, trying to change the topic.

"It looks great." She said.

"I hope it does because we took a long time for it to get this way," I said; Celeste laughed. I turned my attention to her as she looked up at the tree with a smile.

I smiled.

Celeste will be able to move on and find someone else. Someone who would love her, marry her, and someone she could have a family with. She'll get that. I know she will.

Yet, why does that bother me?

(*Kassandra Speaks*)

Oh dear, why do you guys think Ji-Cheol feels that way?

Give this chapter a VOTE & COMMENT!

Xoxo

-Kassandra Vivu