mark on my heart | Mark Sloan

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Bonnie stares up at the hospital, frozen as she has been for the past 45 minutes. She can't bring herself to go inside. Same as yesterday - she sat on the bench for 3 hours before going home. And the day before. She hasn't told Mark. She just told him she got too busy to check in. She has to today she has no other choice; her new therapist is based in the hospital.

"There's a sight for sore eyes." A familiar voice says.

Bonnie looks to her left and smiles wide. "Hey!" She rushes to Bailey, hugging her tight.

Bailey stretches up to give the tightest, most bone crushing hug she can. "Bonnie Teller, I missed the shit out of you." Bailey sighs.

They hold each others arms as they pull apart. "I missed you too. How is this place?"

"Eh." Bailey rolls her eyes.

"How did you know I'd be here?" She wonders.

"Mark mentioned your session is at 1. And I know you well enough you'd be here early and you'd struggle to have confidence to go in." Bailey shrugs. "Figured you'd need a hand to hold."

Bonnie blushes. "Am I that predictable?"

"I just know you." She smiles and offers a hand. "C'mon. We'll go together."

Bonnie takes her hand as she takes a shaky breath. "Together. Right." She nods small.

Bailey smiles gently and begins to walk, slow and at Bonnie's pace. She hounded Mark earlier as to why he wasn't taking the time off to be with her but he said it's their agreement. This is what Bonnie wants and he isn't to push her. He's scared to, Bailey can tell; she'll have to be bad cop for a while.

The nearer they get to the door, the harder it is for Bonnie to move until she finally stops, shaking her head. "I-I can't."

"You can. The hospital is safe. You are safe. We just gotta step over that threshold, get you inside, and go to the left. You know this hospital like the back of your hand, okay? It's no different." Bailey reassures, squeezing her hand.

Bonnie holds her breath, frozen still, until Bailey gives a gently tug and she stumbles after her. She squeezes her eyes shut as she steps in the doors, into the warm lobby. She slowly opens her eyes and let's out the breath she's been holding, looking around. "The same." She whispers taking another shaky breath.

"Alright, we did it. You're in." Bailey smiles. "Now let's go ahead, to the left. Muscle memory, you got this."

"Ahead to the left. Ahead and left." Bonnie whispers to herself as she walks slow, gripping Baileys hand tighter to make sure she doesn't leave. The steps she makes are slow, calculated. But before she knows it they're in the east wing, amongst all the offices rented by psychologists and therapists and physical therapists and everything else.

"You did it!" Bailey grins. "Perfect time too, I gotta dash." She checks her pager.

"You can't leave me!" Bonnie pales.

"Yes I can. You got this, I can't talk for you." Bailey smirks and walks off, Bonnie stood frozen in the corridor.

She struggles to breathe for a moment as she grabs the railing along the wall, leaning on it as the world spins. She closes her eyes and takes several deep breaths, making sure to count to 7 before breathing again. She slowly opens her eyes, the world now stable, and slowly straightens up. And, slowly again, she takes more calculated steps.

Before she knows it, she's quickly knocking on the door to her therapists office. She knocks rapidly, looking around quickly. As soon as the door opens she rushes inside, gasping in a breath. "I'm sorry I'm so-"