(ooh, a pokemon mystery dungeon chapter!! i half wanted to do this because ash and pikachu's story is done, but I don't know what correlation that has here. we'll be using the cast of characters from time, darkness & sky, because I've finished explorers of sky. the main rescue team will be pikachu (leader) and eevee (partner))
Grovyle: Don't weep for the stupid. You'll be crying all day.
Grovyle: Can I have some water?
Eevee: *starts chugging their water bottle*
Eevee: *chokes from drinking too fast*
Eevee: *spills water all over themselves*
Eevee, coughing: I don't have any water.
Chatot: When I said you should try being friendlier this isn't what I meant.
Pikachu, stirring a cup of tea aggressively: Oh, so now I'm TOO friendly? There's no pleasing you.
Grovyle, who broke into his house an hour ago: Two sugars please.
Pikachu: Coming right up.
Chimecho: Hey, can we stay in your dorm tonight?
Pikachu: Why?
Chimecho: Shaymin fiddled with an ouija board and cursed ours.
Eevee: Grovyle doesn't know how to banish spirits, so he just throws salt at them and yells, "DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A HOTEL TO YOU?!"
Pikachu: What do rainbows mean to you?
Celebi: Gay rights.
Eevee: There's money.
Chatot: The sign of God's promise to never destroy the whole world with a flood.
Grovyle: It is an optical phenomenon that separates sunlight into its continuous spectrum when the sun shines on raindrops.
Celebi: Anyone else feel good when their brain releases a bunch of endorphins?
Darkrai: Can't relate.
Eevee: Why would my brain release a bunch of Palafins?
Chatot: Why are you late?
Shaymin: A technical error occurred, causing an unexpectedly long bout of unconsciousness.
Chatot: Overslept?
Shaymin: Overslept.
Darkrai: Y'know, maybe things aren't so bad. I'm here. I got the nice ocean breeze. Just alone with my thoughts.
Pikachu: Hey, Darkrai.
Darkrai: GODDAMNIT!
Loudred: Darkrai, you're an asshole, man.
Darkrai: You are what you eat, Loudred.
Loudred, surprised: W-what the FUCK, man?! That was kinda sick!
Darkrai: *chuckles* Thanks, I worked hard on it.
Grovyle: We call that a traumatic experience.
Grovyle, turning to Eevee: Not a "bruh moment".
Grovyle, turning to Pikachu: Not "sadge".
Grovyle, turning to Celebi: And DEFINITELY not an "oof LMAO".
Pikachu: Do Charizard fart fire?
Wigglytuff: I don't know.
Pikachu: I thought you went to college.
Celebi: When I get murdered, can you make sure I become an unsolved case?
Pikachu: wHat?
Celebi: I want to be on Buzzwole Unsolved.
Pikachu: Can we go back to the part when you said "when I get murdered"?
Eevee: Capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my uncle Jack off a Mudsdale." and "I had to help my uncle jack off a Mudsdale."
Eevee: Seriously, Grovyle, how many people would you have killed if we'd asked you to?
Grovyle: That's not important--
Eevee: I DISAGREE.
Eevee: Wigglytuff taught me to think before I act.
Eevee: ...So if I smack the shit out of you, rest assured that I thought about it and am confident in my decision.
Celebi and Eevee: *making loud, shouty gorilla sounds at each other*
Chatot:
Grovyle, exasperatedly: We have a guest.
Celebi: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute.
Gardevoir: No, that's not how you make cookies.
Pikachu: FLOOR IT!!
Celebi: How about 4,000,000 degrees for 1 second?!?
Gardevoir: yOU'RE GONNA BURN THE HOUSE DOWN-
Celebi: I'M GONNA HARNESS THE POWER OF THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES!
Eevee: DO IT!
Gardevoir: NO-
Gardevoir: I need life advice.
Shaymin, sipping Beery Juice and eating cookie dough: You came to the right person.
Gardevoir: Yesterday, I watched Eevee try to eat a decorative rock from Shaymin's potted plant. Grovyle caught them, and told them they can't eat rocks. Eevee started whining something about no food being in the house before walking away.
Celebi: :)
Eevee: >:(
Celebi: Turn that frown upside down!
Eevee: ):<
Celebi: Not sure what I was expecting...
Celebi: Can I have some?
Eevee, mouth full of cheesecake: It's really spicy, you wouldn't like it.
Celebi: So I got this amazing plan!
Pikachu: We fail almost every time you say that.
Celebi: Well this is the same! But with a Dedenne involved.
YOU ARE READING
Pokémon Incorrect Quotes
Fanfictionpokemon incorrect quotes that may or may not fit the characters. has SOME hints to some romantic relationships, but mostly just platonic quotes.
