The Past

A Short Stroll

I just wanna be someone relevant and do something worthwhile

The night air was cool, even with my well-covering gown. A sudden paranoia overwhelmed me that he was a god and this was just a game to him, to all of them. As if a human princess of no kingdom could really be of any importance.

"So..." Neither of us quite knew how to start a conversation, which led to an awkward air hanging between us.

"Do you like Orion so far?" He asked me, a faint flush in his cheeks. No, no, I had to be mistaken. He was a god, not a young boy, and gods do not blush.
He did seem more boy than god, though. His smile endowed with subtle dimples, his nose always a bit red. He was cute, pretty, but I wasn't sure I'd call him handsome.

"Princess, is everything all right?"

Oh. I had been staring.

"Yes! Y-yes uh, sorry," I stammered, wondering if the same blush was now on my face. "I was just, uh, thinking."

"What were you thinking about?"

Was he innocent or was he playing a game?

"You."

"Well, that's very blunt." He took my hand and guided me around the edge of the balcony that oversaw the sea. Did he know how foreign this touch was to me? Every move he made filled my head with questions as I remembered something his own mother had told me.

On Orion, you must be careful, Alarithe said. Every person is a pawn, human or god, and the only way to beat their game is to be better at it. And if you ever think one of them isn't playing, you're wrong. Everyone is playing a game.

I didn't want to believe her.

"I do tend to be blunt." I realised that we were now out of view of the grand windows in the ballroom. "I find honesty is a good shield, as well as a good weapon. So, since we're discussing honesty, what is it you want from me, Aeremordus?"

"Why must I want something?"

"Because you simply do. And Athern approached me, as well, and if I'm to be more blunt, I shall say that there's no true reason for either of you to court me, as you have nothing to gain."

"Has it occurred to you that perhaps we think you're rather beautiful? And I, for one, quite enjoy speaking to you."

"No. You have goddesses at your disposal, ones that can look however they please. And you would never have approached me without your father's instruction."

"And why did he do that, do you think?"

"I think... I think I may have caught his attention, because I summoned him into my bathing chamber by accident. And I think he may have been trying to rectify any damage I caused by arranging for me and you to dally, so that he would not be tempted."

"You're quite arrogant if you believe the king of the gods would betray my mother for you." He let go of my hand and pulled away to lean on the balcony.

"No, I don't think he would. I think anytime someone catches his eye, he makes it so that he couldn't even if he wanted to, lest Alarithe take matters into her own hands.

"Perhaps. He told me long before you came that I was to court you. My mother specifically requested."

"Oh."

The conversation died there, so rather than hold a funeral, we went back to the ball. All of the women glared at me as we walked back, whereas the men did not even look in my direction, and suddenly I understood Alarithe's instructions.

Blessed, sweet, bloody insane woman. She had made it so none of the "suitors" would even dare speak to me, lest they risk upsetting Hathe himself. This was the game. And I would have to keep it up, by playing the fool who is madly in love with the prince of the gods.

Shouldn't be too hard, I thought.

"I see the game." My whisper was barely audible over the music and chatter.

"Then play it," Remor laughed, offering his hand for a dance.

"Can you get me a ship and a crew?" I asked him as we danced.

"Are you mad? What would you want a ship for?" He wasn't the world's most skilled dancer, honestly.

"I do not plan on staying here. It would be stupid and pointless, as I really don't intend on marrying quite yet." I did like the way my gown twirled, though. Back home, we didn't wear such fluff, and we certainly didn't have balls. You can't have a ball without servants, and you can't have servants with such a small population. Erisin had blessed us, though, so until we were proper kingdoms, childbirth was an instant thing, and pregnancy only lasted two months. Many people had over ten children.

"Where will you go?"

"I want to find the Mirror." He completely halted his dancing.

"The Mirror has been lost for centuries, maybe even millennia," Remor said.

"Yes, and I want to find it and leave our Realm. I've never wanted to be princess, or to become queen of a kingdom that isn't even a kingdom. I just want a life, a completely normal life. I want to meet a man and love him, I want a farm, I want to raise a family. I don't want a daughter I barely speak to, and a husband I never see, all because I'm trying to run a kingdom that doesn't even exist."

"I'll get you a ship."

Soon, people started returning to their rooms. It was getting late after all, and there would be another ball in a few days. All the true romances and alliances took place in the time between the balls, but everything played its part.

We bid each other goodnight and I returned to my rooms, careful not to swear on anyone's name in my bathing chamber this time.