One shot book

I'm scared

'I'm scared. I don't- please. I- I can't put it into words I just- please. Don't go. Don't go, don't go, don't go. I want, I need-' She could feel the tears start to prick in the corners of her eyes but she knew it was useless. It wouldn't change anything. Not at all.

'Why does this always happen to me' She thought. 'Only me, it's only me. Why? Why do I care about them? Why do they always leave me alone in the end?'

She didn't think she could do this. That she could handle this, that she would be able to pull through. It was just too much. She wished she would've picked somewhere else, anywhere else. Maybe then they wouldn't always leave her alone.

Originally, it was just to get a feel of things. She was never supposed to come care for these creatures as much as she did at all. Not it the slightest. But she did, and now, over and over again, she was forced to pay the price as the results of her actions.

They always left eventually. Something that they called a fact of life. She knew this fact very well, she just didn't expect it to be so soon. Humans were so delicate and fragile and there lifespans were so so short. Too short.

When she became old enough she remembered that the council had let her choose which planet that was similar enough to her home planet to where she could survive living there. She decided to pick Earth, after all, it was a pretty famous spot for her kind.

They were sent (after picking their top three planets they wished to visit) to their chosen planets when they were 3000 years old. Still relatively young and what a human would call as she found out, a "teenager". Then they would spend 200-300 years on the planet trying different kinds of food, interacting with the different species, collecting all kinds of Data about the different life and sights on the planet.

It wasn't for anything malicious, she had found herself laughing at the movies humans made of Extraterrestrial life, but rather to see the different customs, life and environments of planets with other life forms.

She remembered arriving on Earth during the Roman times. When she donned her human disguise she looked physically 14. Now, during Modern times she looked physically 21.

She knew she wasn't supposed to be on this planet for more than 300 years, that she was supposed to go back to her home planet, but she found herself falling in love with the earth and all it had to offer.

The humans who she watched grow and grow over the millennia, the ground shift beneath her feet, the plants and animals were beautiful and constantly evolving. The only downside was how unnecessarily violent the humans could be at times and how taxing they were to their dutiful little planet.

As she grew fond of everything she found herself adopting human ways such as a human name to go along with her original name, human cooking, and human speaking patterns. She knew it was bad to get close to them.

As she got closer to certain humans she revealed her true nature as otherworldly.
But, humans, as she soon found out, lived very short lives, like a candle flame (was that the correct human term?) and it could be very easily snuffed out.

Every single time she got close to a human (it was terrifyingly easy to do) she watched as they were ripped away from her leaving her all alone whether it was from heatstroke, hunger, dehydration, war, injury, accidents, sickness, old age... a plethora of things could and did happen to them and they always had to leave her in the end.

She should've stopped growing attached, she shouldn't have been attached to them in the first place, but every single time she grew either a friendship, sibling bond or Motherly bond over them and every single time they died leaving her all alone. She knew this, this was a part of life.

But this time it was different. This was the only time she had somehow fell in love with this human man and now here she was, with their half Human-half Drulog 64 year old daughter (although she was physically and mentally 1 seeing as she aged slower than a human but faster than a Drulog) in the other room, begging, pleading that he didn't die to.

Because she didn't know if she could make it if he did, knew that she was absolutely terrified at the slightest prospect of his death. Of him leaving her like the others. But she had been foolish. Humans could never stay for as long as Drulogs and even though she knew this crucial fact she still got close to many over the years yet chose to ignore it.

And her love's time was obviously up. He had lived on the Earth for 96 years, that was a very long time for humans. She felt her antenna unfurl and she could no longer hear his heart beat. He was dead. Death and Earth worked as a team to claim his body and soul as the humans would put it.

She let out a scream. An agonizing, blood curdling scream that was part scream, part wail, part sob and all pain and it came from the core of her being and would disturb many who heard. The humans would describe it as something akin to that of a helpless mother watching as the sisters Harm, Danger and Death took her child away.

This was a wail that she let out when any human she grew close to died. The reason for this was because she was still close to them, they all still mattered to her and were important in her life no matter if the bond was familiar, friendship or romantic.

And she was helpless to save them, she was doomed to watch over and over and over again as she grew close to someone and what seemed like as what seemed like a flash to her, a lifetime went by and death would whisk them away in her greedy little arms.

I hope you enjoyed this angst oneshots I've promised you. I'm working on my Numbered Series but I will be uploading this. If you want to you can go check it out.

1078 words.