The Life & Adventures of Jinx and Lux, Actual Cats

Chapter One

"Powdeeeeer~"

Powder hates her human.

"Oh, Powder, guess what?"

Vi is obnoxious, loud, and her belly pats are always a touch too rough, what with those calloused hands of a boxer. Moreover, Vi insists on keeping Powder on a diet and only allows her a certain amount of treats, which, in reality, is a crime against the feline kind.

Powder is a unique, beautiful, smart, genius cat, and it's a sad reflection of our reality that she has been condemned with having Vi as her human and caretaker.

Vi rushes into the room, snatching Powder from her cat bed and buries her face into the cat's fur. "Oh Powder, the pretty girl said yes!"

"I hate you and everything you stand for," Powder meows as she hopes that Vi will get the hint and let her down.

"Yes, you're right, I'm so lucky!" Vi continues happily and starts waving Powder around the room as she waltzes to herself. "Big sis is getting to know Cait in real life!"

"I hope you step on a lego brick and fall on your face," Powder meows.

"Yes, I love you too, little kitty sister, my tiny meow meow meow!"

"You're a moron," Powder meows back as Vi finally sets her down. "You have one single brain cell and even that one doesn't operate at full throttle. Why, if I were to quote Catristotles-"

"Kitty cuddles!" Vi screams, and Powders meows in horror as the human grabs her and starts cuddling.

"No! I am being violated! The Great Tiger created me to be a hunter, not a cuddly toy!"

Alas, Vi cannot understand catspeak, so the human continues cuddling for a bit before she finally lets go and gasps. "Oh my God, Caitlyn is gonna be here any minute! After months of video chatting, she finally decided it's time for us to meet! And she's bringing her cat with her! Hope I don't get... catfished. Haha, get it, Powder?"

"I will murder you in your sleep and feed your body to the rats," Powder responds and starts licking off Vi's scent. After all, there will be a new cat in her territory and Powder needs to establish dominance.

There's a doorbell ringing and, for a second, Powder considers following her instincts and rushing under the bed, but then puffs out her chest and proudly walks towards the door, where Vi has already opened the door, gasping at some tall blue-haired human who blushes immediately as she sees Vi.

"God, Vi, you are even prettier in person," the human says, setting down a cat carrier.

"Y-you are so gorgeous, Cait," Vi responds like the moron she is, her face resembling her hair in colour.

Powder pays no heed to the two gay messes who finally met after a long-distance relationship, because out of the cat carrier walks a pristine white cat, who-

-who is, very likely, the most beautiful cat Powder has ever laid eyes upon.

"Hello!" the cat meows at her, licking her paw. "My name is Lux! Would you like to perform the ritual sniffing first or would you extend the privilege to me as your guest?"

Powder suddenly finds herself at a lack of words. Only Vi's stupid remark, "Powder, be nice to Lux!" sets her back on track.

"I, I'll let you perform the ritual," Powder meows weakly and watches as Lux sniffs around her, feeling her body grow much warmer than usual.

Powder can bet Lux can kill two mice with one bite if she wants to. By the Great Tiger, perhaps she can hunt a bird mid-air and actually crawl down the tree afterwards! No, Powder shakes her head to herself. That is the stuff of legends, not real world. No one can climb down a tree, that's just impossible.

"All done!" Lux beams at the owner of the house. (At the real owner, that is, Vi doesn't even realise she is Powder's bipedal serf.) "May I say, I have never seen a cat with blue fur before! That's so beautiful and unique!"

Now, Powder, don't screw this up. You're eloquent, smart, you have to impress this girl! "You are pretty pretty too! I mean pretty pretty! I mean rather pretty, old chum, haha!"

Lux just watches in surprise as Powder makes a total fool of herself, then rubs her cheek against Powder's side and waves her tail. "Will you show me around?"

Powder follows the white cat and thinks that, somehow, despite the apartment being her territory, she doesn't mind letting this cat be here too.