Full Bloom

What's Her Name?

It was a hot, hot day at VHHS. I was so bummed that I wouldn't be able to enjoy the new wing that was going to be done in time for fall. It was going to have AC. I was in a maternity tank top, stretchy shorts, and flip flops. I was very, very done with school.

I took my very last New York State Regents exam to the front of the gymnasium and handed it in, then walked out the door. That was it. I was all done with school. I went into the cafeteria and met up with Nassi. The room was full of excitable students that were waiting for their ride home.

"How did yours go?" she asked.

"Not bad. I'm pretty sure I passed," I said, taking a seat. "I can't believe that this is literally gonna be my last time in this building. Like, it's my last day as a normal high-schooler."

"I'm gonna miss you. It won't be the same next year," she said, frowning.

"You'll still have Karen and Ollie."

"I know, I know. But it's just...not the same," she said.

We hung out and had snacks from the vending machine while waiting for the other two to get finished up with their exams. Karen was the last to arrive, freshly traumatized from her earth science exam.

When I walked out the front entrance for the last time, it actually felt good. It was hotter inside than it was outside. But emotionally, it was weird. Sometimes I thought, Am I really pregnant? Like, I'm really going to have a baby and not go to school anymore?

The four of us piled into the hippy bus and went straight to the ice cream stand. I ordered my pregnancy favorite: rocky road with gummy worms. We found a nice shady spot to sit down. I was getting so big that I could barely even sit at a picnic table anymore. Ugh. Only a few more weeks to go.

"Are you ready to tell them?" Oliver asked me.

"Huh? Tell us what?" Karen asked.

"We officially picked a name!" we said in unison.

"Oh, finally! I thought you guys would never get that figured out," Karen said. Nassi playfully nudged her.

"Go ahead, guys," Nassi said.

"Okay, it's a little 'out there,' but we wanted to give her something that's really unique," Oliver said.

"Yeah, because there's a million Jennifers out there and I just want her to feel like 'no one has the same name as me,'" I said.

"Dude, just spit it out!" Karen said.

"Okay...it's Chrysanthemum," I said. Karen and Nassi gave me a blank stare. "We're going to call her Chris for short, but it'll be Chris with a y. C-H-R-Y-S." No answer. "Oh no...you guys hate it."

"Well, you took the words right out of my mouth," Karen said, licking her ice cream.

"Karen! That is like, so rude! You can't say that to people," Nassi said.

"Hey, I didn't say it. Jen did." She sighed. "Just...like, you're not joking?" Ollie and I didn't know how to answer. "Guys, you're serious?"

"You don't even like Chrys?" I asked.

"As your friend, I know you'd want me to be honest with you. I don't like it. It's a mouthful and it's too long. Chris with a y is just...weird. If you want to call your kid Chris, there's other names. Christine, Christina, Christa, Christal—"

"Let me interject," Nassi said. "As someone with a name that's unique by American standards, it's tough not finding your name on anything. I love my name, but sometimes I wish I had one that was a bit more popular...but I do like being the only Naseeba around. It makes me feel like I'm one of a kind, in a good way."

"I'm just saying, if it was my kid, I wouldn't do that to them," Karen said. "Where did you guys think of that anyway?"

"Annie's favorite book is about this little mouse named Chrysanthemum that loves her name. I dunno...I just fell in love with it, and I think Chrys is really cute," I said.

"They're also my personal favorite flower, because they're one of the very few I'm not allergic to," Oliver said.

Karen shook her head. "What about a middle name?"

"Honestly, her name is so long that we're not going to give her a middle name," I said.

"Okay, I'll give you that one," Karen said.

With my raging third-trimester hormones, I started to get emotional. I was sobbing like a complete idiot.

"Jen, I'm sorry, but the poor girl is going to get totally bullied in school," Karen said.

"I think you've gotten your point across, Karen," Oliver said in a stern voice as he put his arm around me. "We understand that people aren't going to like it, but it's not something we're going to change."

"Maybe...we...should," I said in between sobs.

"No way. You love this name. It's going to fit her perfectly," Oliver said.

"I know but...we're probably gonna get this same kind of reaction from a lot of people," I said.

"It just happens when you have a unique name. She'll get used to it," Nassi said.

I wiped my eyes on my napkin. Oliver tried to change the subject to movies, but I was so focused on what Karen said. Chrys wasn't even here yet, and I was already doubting my decisions as a mother. What if she hates her name? What if she hates me for giving her such a special name?

She pressed her little foot right against my belly. I gave her a little rub back. No, I already loved her unconditionally. I was never going to abandon her. I knew she'd always love me back.