I'm Still Breathing

sixteen

It's been the fourth month and I haven't visited her because I don't really know what to say if she ever wakes up. In my hand, it holds her last letter. I don't know, if I'm going to read this, but, I need to read this. It's the last letter, whatever is in, it must be important. Maybe it contains her last note.

25th of October, 2014

Dear Logan,

I'm writing this after my homecoming party, which you forgot to come. You didn't come and I waited for you.

There were so many things that have happened on New York. I turned alcoholic, which is not totally me. I tried to be a smoke like Blaire, who was the girl that you talked to when I told you I needed a shower.

Basically, this letter just contains what happened in New York, never stays in New York.

I stayed at a hotel for two days and I bumped into Toby and Blaire in one bar, and they were practically problematic like me. Toby and I vibe well, so she insisted me to stay at their apartment because they have another spare room. The two were also trying to escape from reality too, just like me.

Blaire stayed in New York because she left her boyfriend. She saw him cheating, like what happened to Jamie and Ashley. She wanted escape and now, she always go bars for free pot and drinks from the people trying to take her home, but she doesn't sleep with them. She just wanted to forget her ex-boyfriend, so she always stays high. It's effective because just this once, you can forget everything if you stayed high all the time. I pity her.

Toby lives in New York alone because her family disowned her for dropping out of school and not living out her parents' expectations. She always have attacks anger, panic, and anxiety. It just hits her like, BAM! She really needs help because she might overdose drinking pills to help her. I pity her too.

I went to New York because I want to escape from my life for awhile. I did my usual thing. I hurt myself, but I experience smoking. First, it hurts because all the air on your lungs burn and get lost, but when you get a hold of it, it can be so refreshing.