gay || afi (side lashton)

Chapter 2

I patiently waited by the Irwin's front porch, hoping I could have a private talk with Ashton. It had been two days since the incident and I've been itching to walk straight into his house and stab the fuck out of him. But of course, I wasn't raised to be like that.

I took a quick glance at my watch, tapping my foot against the cold, side walk. I've been standing here for almost an hour and according to his sister, who insisted on inviting me inside to have some juice and cookies (but I politely declined), Ashton usually goes home at about nine p.m.

Just five more minutes.

I took my time making myself look presentable with a casual fix of my hair or straightening out of my clothes. If I was going to confront him, I have to look good at least. After about ten more minutes of waiting, I could see tall, buff figure staggering towards me. The man appeared to be drunk by the way he walks but as the figure passed by the flickering lamp post, I could clearly see the mop of blonde curls coming my way walking goofy as a tall blonde boy trailed behind him, laughing at his antics. Ashton stopped walking to talk to the blonde boy for a minute. The blonde boy whispered something into his ear which made Ash giggle out loud. The sight made me sick and I wanted nothing but to puke my guts out. Which I totally could've once Ashton pecked the blonde boy's lips. A little while after, they said their goodbyes and Ashton continued to walk towards the direction of his house—where I was currently standing.

Once he reached the porch, his eyes widened at the sight of me—in shock at first, which quickly turned to hesitance.

"Hey!" he said in a cheery-unsure voice, trying his best to mask his surprise. I could sense the false excitement he was showing me which only made more angry. It's like he wasn't actually excited to see me. He started to put an arm around my shoulder but I quickly swatted him away.

I glared at him, "Don't 'hey' me!"

Ashton took a step back and judging by the change of expression, I knew he figured out that something was up. "Um," he scratched the back of his head, "Carrie is something wrong?"

I groaned and there had not been a day that I wanted to rip his lungs out—except for now. I stepped closer to him, "Let us see," I hissed bitterly, "You ignore me for almost a damn whole month and then just walk up to me and say 'hey'?"

Ashton's body slumped, closing his eyes for a moment. He knitted his eyebrows together as he pinched the bridge of his nose. "I said I was busy," he said.

"You didn't seem that busy to me when I saw you with that boy in our favorite coffee shop!" I exclaimed.

His whole body tensed and I could see the way his eyes stare at the ground that he had been caught. He kept his eyes locked on the ground and I just wanted to jump at him at break his neck. I tried to push my extremely violent thoughts out of my head, waiting for him to respond. The chilly, autumn air suddenly became tense around us and I could barely breath properly through my anger. It almost seemed like hours just waiting for him to say something, so I did.

"Well?" I asked, throwing my hands up in the air.

It took him a few seconds to move from his place. He slowly peered up at me, with a guilty look in his eyes. "I'm sorry," he said quietly. The way his eyes glimmered under the porch lights made me almost forgive him but I have to be strong for this. I didn't want to melt under his gaze.

I sighed, sitting on the stairs of the porch. Ashton did the same but kept at least one foot away from me which was unlikely for him. "You know, I understand that you have a life and all that shit but you could've at least told me where you're running off every time I call you and not bailing on our plans," I explained softly, my anger slowly disintegrating. I lightly kicked the stone in front me, watching it roll over to the road.

"I'm sorry," Ashton repeated as he kept his head hung low between his legs.

"And plus, we never hang out anymore!" I whined, "And it's all because of that stupid boy."

Ashton sighed loudly, "That stupid boy's name is Luke."

"I don't care," I said, the bitterness evident in my voice.

"Well you should," he shrugged, "because he's, um. He's my boyfriend," he awkwardly pointed out. The moment those words left his mouth, I found myself speechless. It seemed like every nerve in my body disconnected themselves to my brain and I was left with no words at all. My stomach churned in an unpleasant manner even though I knew I shouldn't be feeling this way. I knew they were together...it just didn't seem real until he actually he said it.

"Oh," was all I could say.

"Yeah, um," he laughed awkwardly, "I'm sorry for not telling."

"It's fine," I frowned to myself, involuntarily standing up. It's like as if I was acting on impulse and I could barely keep in control of myself. "I gotta go," I said plainly. I heard Ashton groan behind me and he pulled me back, making me hit his chest. He wrapped his large arms around me, crushing me into a bear hug. I could feel the heat radiating off of his body, contrasting to the cold air of the night. He felt nice and warm and he made me feel all fuzzy inside. Which I guarantee you isn't normal for me. "I'll make it up to you," he whispered, "We'll spend the whole day together tomorrow." We spent a few more moments in that position until I bid him farewell, crossing the street back to my house. Little did I know that my mom had been watching the scene unravel beneath her through her bedroom window.

I shut the door quietly, leaning against it. I released the air that I've been choking on ever since he hugged me and there, in the pit of my stomach, is something I've never felt before.

"Oh, fuck," I whispered into realization.

a/n

YAY I FUCKING UPDATED AFTER 1000000000000 YEARS I'VE BEEN SO BUSY WITH MY THREE OTHER BOOKS THAT I NEARLY LOST ALL INSPIRATION FOR THIS BUT AT LEAST NOW I UPDATED YAY YAY YAY

sorry if this is a crappy chapter (filler) hahaha ilysm iM SORRY

and please read my three other books (a letter to elise,, luke / ghost,, luke / and gender bender,, muke)

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-athena