Until We Break

The height of luxury - Chapter 5

Akira Pov

I turned around, hearing someone walk behind me. It made me feel unsettling spine chills. I was paranoid and I didn't know why. "Akira? You okay?" The voice asked. I turned to face it, seeing the brunette who was looking at me. Darwin. I smiled softly, reassuring him with a nod. "Yeah... Just tired is all. What's up Dare?" I asked with a smile. I had started calling him dare in middle school, but it changed when we got into high school. I thought I would bring it back. It was a pleasant surprise to me when he smiled softly at me in response to me bringing up the nickname.

"I need your help... How did you know you were... you know." He tried to ask, with me being confused about what was going on. It took him a moment to get it out. "Gay?" I asked, confused. He nodded at that. I looked at him, raising an eyebrow to his question. "Well... in 7th grade I met Hiro. And I fell for him... and I had never liked someone before him so..." I explained what my experience was, lengthening the name I meant.

"Ah. Do you ever even talk to Hiro anymore?" He asked, confused. I sighed and shook my head. I wanted to talk to Hiro more, but I couldn't. We were barely acquaintances. Darwin sighed and sat on the floor, his back meeting the wall I was leaning on. I looked down at him as his curly hair fell flat on his forehead. "I'm bisexual..." He whispered, just loud enough for me to hear it.

"You should abandon him like he did you when you told him you were gay." Itona spoke slyly, causing me to roll my eyes and sit on the floor beside Darwin. He was confused as I looked at him, ruffling his curls slightly. "Dope. Welcome to the alphabet mafia, we meet at 6 am on Thursdays." I giggled. He looked at me in shock as I said that before chuckling along with me.

"Noted. Thats not why I need your help though. I... need to find a way to tell Hiro I'm... in love with him." He spoke. That's when everything went silent. I shouldn't care. That's dumb. I barely know him anymore. Just an acquittanced guy I know. Itona was hysterical when he heard that, laughing and rolling on the floor beside me. "Damn! Going after your pride too huh!" He chuckled out, a psychotic look on his face. Did I really think that? Gods... this is... a lot.

"I wanted to ask you Cuz... your work and music... all the love songs I've seen you write... it's just. Perfect." Darwin admitted. He was the only one I've ever shown my song writing too. It was a way I coped with my mother's death and my father's abusive tendencies. I wrote little love songs that I poured my feelings into, that weren't ever supposed to see the light of day... but he found the pages while we were hanging out one day in freshman year, the week I told him I was gay.

"Are you sure that you are in... Love with Hiro, Darwin?" I asked, trying to fake a soft smile. He nodded profusely before sighing and looking into the filled halls of the school. "You don't want to help, do you?" He asked, not even looking in my direction. I took a deep breath before thinking of a response.

"I do, I want to help. It's just that Hiro is complicated and hard to read... I think its best if you get it out in like a note or something. Make it meaningful. Like I do with my music." I smiled softly, resting my head on the white painted brick of the wall. His breath slowed as his smile grew. "I think. I'm going to take that advice... thanks lion man." He smiled, getting off the ground. Lion man. I contemplated that as he walked into the crowd of other students finding their ways to their classes.

"Well, that was fucking cocky." Itona spouted out. Immediately I got up and found an empty gender-neutral bathroom and ran in, closing and locking the door. "Won't you shut the fuck up itona!?" I yelled, looking into the mirror. I looked like a mess. My white hair and blue streak were messed up and slightly curled. The plain black sweatshirt I had on was thin and it made it hard to conceal my binder.

"I mean it could be worse... It's not like I was going to tell him anyway..." I muttered, sitting on the floor again and looking at my blue jeans. I don't know how I felt. It was all so confusing.

Mai Pov

The sour taste in my mouth of the sour patches I ate earlier that day kept me up as I tried to sleep. I sighed, feeling my thoughts overflow. Why was Akira avoiding me?  Why was he hanging out with Darwin of all people? I took a moment before sitting up and looking through my messages with him. My mind tossed and turned when I scrolled up.

AKIRA_KIYOYAMA  December 18th 9:35 pm

Your sure? I mean, we were pretty chill with him yesturday. He was chill

MaiYubisa_69420 9:36 pm

Yeah, pretty sure

Darwin has always been a prick to us

AKIRA_KIYOYAMA 9:36 pm

I'm not sure about him, truly. I don't trust him

But at the same time, we used to be friends

I'm not going to fight back against him

I looked up to Akira. He was younger than me by a few months, but even so he was kind. He admired everything people did for him but soon that would be his downfall.

I don't know why I feel compelled to be so mean to him. Maybe it had to do with that dream? I'd have to go back to the monastery to check but it's supernatural, Akira would have to talk to me. That scared me for some reason. The dream felt too real, but also not real enough. Like a mix of a dream and reality. Maybe Em and Hiro know. I'll ask them the next time I see them.

My heart ached, and I didn't know why. Maybe I was just tired. I took a moment before yawning and turning off my phone, getting ready to go back to bed.