(A/N:Forget about the bonfire or just picture this after the bonfire)
My Feelings Are All Mixed Up,I have no choices ,A reason to be like this because the Pain is indescrible ,I need my mom on a time like this but she's not here I miss her I wish I would have spent more time with her instead of shot up in my room crying I should have been in her presence 24/7 if only she had a little bit more time but now I have to watch them lay her to rest but I'm grateful for the good times we had like one time we were at Disney Land and Mickey Mouse came up to her laughing and jumping and she tripped him,One time Me and my brother.Yes I have a brother he's coming for the funeral .were prank calling and we prank called her off my friend phone but we didn't know she had my friends number.We had Bad times like when she was going through
depression because my stepdad was not coming home the time the other people was going home to their family she cried for 3wks straight didn't come out of her room but to get a snack and something to drink so she won't starve but I'm grateful for the amount of time we got to spend with her R.I.P Mommy I Love You .<3
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"And Now Her Daughter Lexianna Will Say A Few Words"The preacher said
I walked up to the stand obviously tears in my eyes threatening to fall but I have to be strong for her My bonita,My Mommy,My Love.I grabbed the mic pulling my speech out .
Me: My Mom was a awesome,loyal,trustworthy,beautiful,caring,encouraging woman and she Never gave up and that's what I Love her for and one day I hope I can be like her someday .She was a mother, a great mother and I miss her but God called her home and home she went cancer free looking down on Me and I know she will be watching over Me to help Me through my struggles .I wish I would have spent more time with my mommy instead of taking advantage of it because now I regret it .She won't live to see her grandkids ,Watch Me fulfill my dreams but I know she will be watching over Me .I Love You Carrie Se'Anna Milsap and R.I.P.I blew a heart to the sky
When I looked up from the ground everybody was in tears even Prod and he even took his shades off TT was crying and had a paper in her hand I guess she's saying a few words.She walked up to the stand and I sat down by Caden(her brother) laying on his shoulders even though we haven't saw eachother in 2yrs we still have that inseperable bond like we had before he moved,He's 21
TT: Carrie Se'anna Milsap is My aunt and I loved her dearly and still do like Lexi said she was and awesome woman yet along awesome aunt one of my favorite aunts .I lived in a different location than her Lexi and Caden so I didn't see them much until I moved down her a couple yrs ago and I tried to cherish every moment I had with her because as they say you Never know what you had until its gone .I just want to say I Love You Auntie Carrie and thank you for teaching us the responsibilities in life.
She came down and sat in her seat because Dad took her seat by showing up late how dare he but anyways I
embraced her in a hug and Caden Got up going up to the stand to say a few words how I Love my brother,
Caden: Carrie Se'anna Milsap was my mother some of you may know Me when I use to go here when I was little and by her nickname she use to call Me all the time "ButterBun"My mom was an encouraging woman she encouraged Me to do things and go for it and she always told Me this scripture "I can do all things through christ that strengthens Me"and I believed in that scripture and why not talk about the good times instead of the bad times don't keep your head down keep it up because that's what she will won't because I know that this Wonderful Woman is in a Better Place And Someday We Will All See Her.I Love You Carrie Se'anna Milsap
I was in tears because Mom brought us back together not by dying but by fate and I will always believe that she's here They're taking here body away I grabbed the necklace she gave Me and kissed it and the church chandileir lit up told you she was here and now there laying her to rest peacefully.
One Day I'll be like her .
************
People was coming up to my family saying "Sorry about your loss"and all I can do was force a smile my family was here and its sad to say that "Dying brought us together" but I just won't to go to my Real home but I know I have dreams that she's sending Me and I'm gonna go for it btw let Me talk to a certain someone that showed up late but not here because that will be total disrespectful so I'll talk to him at home after I get some rest hopefully I just wanna go back home .
*After the Funeral*
Soon as we get home I walk upstairs to my room and kick my shoes off and my clothing and hop in the shower to relax my muscles I get out lotion up put on deordorant and slip on my pajamas and as soon as I lay my head on my comfy zebra print pillow and get under my soft fuzzy blanket with a picture of Me on top I hear a scream.Why can't we have any peace in this house might as well go check and see who it is .I go downstairs and see Prince and Shae arguring,What the Hell,imma bout to snap nawl keep yo cool and say it in a calm mannered voice
"OMG IM TRYING TO GET SOME SLEEP BECAUSE I'M TIRED AS HELL AND I'M DONT NEED THIS ARGUING WHAT YOU ARGUING FOR ANYWAYS NEVERMIND just please try to argue in a peaceful soft-mannered voice"I said sorry guys I'm loud
"Bitch go back upstairs or wherever you came from"Shae said ooh she testing Me since she wanna be wet so bad how bout I kick her out and then go to sleep yea I should do that
"You know what get out of this house NOW! "I said angry but calm
"You can't just put Me out"Shae said ok how bout I push you out and whoever else wanna join you
"But I can push you out"I said pushing her out while she's kicking and screaming Prince name
"You can't just kick my Girlfriend out like just because I won't be with you"Prince said ooh this blexican must won't his feelings hurt
"Well I just did and your welcome to join her in the rain.I Never ask you to be with Me be with that bamboo stick because i won't lose no sleep over it "I said heading upstairs
I Layed in my bed head on my pillow ,warm under my blankey while drifting off in a peaceful sleep with only one thing on my mind and that's my Mom.
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Author's Note: How was it? Sad ,Okay,Awesome What well anyways I know y'all are dissapointed because of the late Chapter and I have 3 good reasons why you should forgive Me.
1).I Had To Start All Over Because I didn't feel that spark like I do now when I reread this
2). I stayed up to 5:00 rewriting this Chapter because I had to feel that spark or I wasn't gonna write it
3).I was going through something I shouldn't have been going through .No I'm not pregnant O.O you dumbos I'm only 13 .I was moody and depress .
So I hope you guys have it in your hearts to forgive Me and also did you hear about Keisha and walter wanted to break up MINDLESS FREAKING BEHAVIOR do they wanna die because let Me tell you I'll bl-nevermind
I Never Knew Lexi had a Brother did you >>>>>>>>*kanye shrug*
Ok yes I did because I'm evil and Caden looks like Bow Wow ikr BUT HE IS A FINE YOUNG SEXY STALLION THAT MAKES ME WANNA HAVE A PIEOXSEE(I don't know how to spell that)
Why Was Walter Late to the funeral How disrespectful and to his daughters mother I alto cut his balls off and feed them to the lions .
20+Comments and Votes Guys if u don't get to this limit Mami' gonna have to cut off the chapters well here you go .
YOU ARE READING
Pain.
FanfictionLexi, TT, Kira and Mya have a hard time in high school, with bullying, drama, and heartbreaks; it's no better at home either. Who knew an audition can build you to the top, but can also bring you back down? Roc, Prodigy, Princeton and Ray are living...
