𝒑𝒆𝒕𝒓𝒊𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒓 ᖭི༏ᖫྀ 𝚎𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚊𝚖𝚜

chapter six : suds'a'plenty!

[VI]

"YOU REALLY stink, you know," I said honestly. And she did smell a little, not rancid or anything, just a little like sweat and a lot like dirt. But she had annoyed me back at the river, so I wanted to prod at her.

"I stink? I stink?" she said from behind me, clearly in disbelief. I nodded, and she pulled on the reins, stopping us in the middle of the path.

"How long did you say you were wandering around with barely any rest, Crumpets? A month or something like that? Now I can imagine that if you had little time to rest, that would leave one, two, three- zero hours of wash time for you in the great wilderness. Eating nothing but meat too, it's no wonder you smell like an animal pen."

I gasped, outraged.

"Right. That's it, you and me, right now," I said, wriggling off Shimmer's back and getting ready to fight.

"There's no way I'm fighting in close proximity with you smelling like that. It was torture enough having to hold onto you on horseback. No, we're both going to have a wash day. But especially you."

"What about Seattle?" I whined.

"Trust me, I gage that I want to get to Seattle as fast as possible even more than you do. But there's just no way we can do this without washing."

I felt like a cat being dragged into bath time by their owner. I caught a whiff of my shirt, though, which was still on backwards, and conceded.

"You'll be excited to see what I have for you, Crumpets. Soap. Can you believe it? That's S-O-A-P. I'm sure you'll love it."

"Fuck you, I use soap when I wash," I said. But I actually hadn't washed with soap in a while; towards the end of my excursion with Abby we had to just wash with water, as the soap ran out fast.

I paused. "What flavour soap?"

"Flavour?" She snorted. "You have used soap before right? You don't eat it, you-"

"Scent, scent, scent! I meant scent, okay?" I interrupted, desperately trying to cover up my mistake.

"Rose," she said, a little smile on her face as she said it.

"Ooh, romantic. Did your lover make it for you back at home, oh fair maiden?" I gushed, winding her up again.

"Please," she scoffed. "Dating is for people without ambition. And who the hell says 'lover' anymore? You sound like a senior citizen."

Dating is for people without ambition.

Was that true? When I dated Abby I didn't really care where she took me, where I was taken. I may as well have been a tumbleweed in the wind. And now...well. Now I was single, and I was the most goal-orientated I had ever felt in my life.

Is falling in love just a distraction, then?

I knew I couldn't be distracted, no matter what.

The lake we had stopped by was undeniably beautiful. I briefly checked the map to see whereabouts we were.

"What's the name of this lake, Ellie?" I called back to her.

"Hmm..." she started. "Think, slightly less assholey of the US presidents?"

"Just because I live here doesn't mean I know all your bogus hick political history you so pride yourselves on."

"Ouch, Crumpets. Right in my non-patriotic heart! But seriously, humour me."

I tried to think of any of the presidents at all.