suicidal .//. S.M.

chapter 25: final chapter

Read author's note at the end please!!!

Shawn*******

"your wish came true. My girlfriend broke up with me," I tell Lilah. She smiles in acomplishment. I roll my eyes and call her phone forgetting that she has it taken away. As soon as it goes to voice mail I hang up. I start to tear up. I can't believe this happened. I have to see her.

~~~

I get to her house and she opens the door and slams it im my face. "Ashley!" I yell pounding on the door. "Let me explain!" I yell. She opens the door and says, "There isn't anything to explain. You cheated. I will be fine." I shake my head and say, "That's not what happened. She was an ex of mine. She is also a social climber."

Ashley shuts the door again not believeing my valid excuse. I guess that's what I get for being famous. "I love you," I whisper to the door. Tears are forming in my eyes and I can't bare to be here anymore. Knowing it is over between us hurts even more. I don't want this to be the end of Ashley and Shawn. If we are over I want this tour to be over. I went on this tour becuase it is something she wanted me to do.

Ashley***********

I heard him whisper he loves me through the door. I love him too, but I can't tell him that. I don't believe his excuse one bit. Why would an ex be all over their ex? I wanted to tell him I forgive him and take him back, but I am sadly not in the right state to be lied to.

I can't stand to see Shawn and Ashley end like this, but it is for the best. My parents hate him, I am starting to see why. Making covers used to make me happy. Now it is like I have been punished with putting them on line for the out come.

My parents aren't home. Thank God. I take my razor and cut my self repeatedly. I wanted to die for sure this time. Making each stroke of the balde against my skin pressured like it is going to be the last thing I do before I die.

I knew this was going to happen. He was going to be doing things behind my back. I just knew it. Even though he is killing me, he would be the one to save me. I wanted him to just be my savior, not my killer too.

Blood was dripping down my arms and legs. I wanted to be dead right now. All I could hear in the back of my mind was, "Suicide does not end the changes of life getting worse, suicide eliminates the possibility of it getting better." Shawn said that to me once when I was in the hospital.

I stopped caring at this point. I wanted it all to be over. I practically felt more and more light headed with each stroke against my skin. The door to the bathroom bursted open and I heard a scream from Kimberly before I finaly closed my eyes and let everything fade to black.

My time has came.....

***********************************

"Promise you'll never leave," ~Shawn Mendes.

The last song was After taste!!!!

Soooooo that happend. I might end this one, but there will be another book if you comment you want a sequal!!!!! Sorry not sorry about the ending!!!!!!!

MUCH LOVE AND MUFFINSSSSSSSS

~KIMBERLY