Unmatched Hatred

Chapter 43

I cannot even begin to describe how much I despise Pansy Parkinson. I detested her more now than I have ever before. I do not even have to like Malfoy to know that Parkinson needs to control herself. She should be aware of boundaries at her grown age.

Some may think that there must have been some signs earlier on in our friendship of Parkinson's obsession, since her intention has always been the same from the beginning. Her intention was to take advantage of my relationship with Malfoy by pretending to be my friend, which apparently gave her the excuse to always be around him. However, even when I look back, I honestly never saw anything coming. I never would have guessed that Parkinson would ever betray me in such an awful way. There were signs, yet I never noticed.

Parkinson and I did not actually start becoming friends until two months into our first year at Hogwarts. She must have laid eyes on Malfoy on the first day and found it all to be love at first sight. Now, I do not know whether Parkinson knew of Malfoy's feelings towards me in our third year or not. Maybe she sensed it from him, which caused her to become jealous. However, instead of just getting to know Malfoy and talking to him like a normal person, Parkinson planned a mischievous scheme that would only hurt her and others involved.

Why she did what she did is beyond me. Everything I have learned about her blows my mind. However, I do not intend to think this through any longer. I must accept the truth that Parkinson is a cruel, obsessive person, and until she recognizes her faults, she will never be able to redeem herself.

The ride in the carriage seemed never ending and happened to be extremely awkward. None of us spoke for the first half of the ride. I gazed up at the Hogwarts Castle as it came more into view and fidgeted once again with my necklace uncomfortably. Malfoy's gaze was led to this action.

I accidentally met his eyes. An uneasy pause followed.

"It's beautiful," I mentioned timidly, letting my fingers play around the gold chain of my necklace.

He replied with a slight, relieved smile, then his eyes were casted to the floor and his expression portrayed to be empty and blank once more. Maybe he did not want to talk to me, or maybe he did not know what to say. However, he still did not answer my question. He never told me why he got me the Christmas present in the first place.

"Where did you get it?" I tried asking.

He almost appeared nervous, yet concealed it well underneath his expression.

"A shop in Hogsmede," he answered. "I forgot what it was called."

I desired to re-ask the one question, but I assumed he would not answer. He did not even get a chance to respond last time since we were rudely interrupted.

Being in the carriage alone with Malfoy made me realize something significant though none of it made sense. Enemies do not drive away bullies from your presence. Enemies do not help you reach a book on the high shelf in the library. Enemies do not tell you "good luck" at the end of a staircase before a court trial, and they sure do not purchase meaningful Christmas gifts for you.

I decided there were better questions worth asking.

"Which one is it?"

"I said I forgot the name of the store."

"No, I mean which one is it? Do you hate me or not... Draco Malfoy?"

He appeared surprised at my questioning. I doubt he was expecting such an interrogation. I am done striving to find a reason for his behavior. I am done searching for answers. I am done trying to figure him out as if he were a puzzle with missing pieces. I do not even care why he gave me the necklace anymore. I only desired to know his true feelings towards me. All I could do now is wait for a response.