Daughter of the Games (Sequel to Pregnant in the Games)

Chapter 27: Only One

It took hours for the world around me to clear up, for things to start making sense.

The moment was so intense, so completely unexpected. It sent me into a whirlwind of images, undecipherable from what was real. I saw so many things- images of my mother, images of Luke, things that couldn't possibly be real. Even after I received that milk as a sponsor gifts, little flashes of bizarre images continued to flash before my eyes.

It was when the hallucinations finally subsided that the reality of the situation hit. I had no idea where Ivan was-the only reason I even knew he was alive was because there had been no extra cannon throughout the day. Besides Ivan and I, there's only one other tribute. These games are almost over.

The most intense part of my thoughts, however, were the parts involved with Ni. Each memory we spent together played out in front of my eyes. Even the ugly times made me feel sentimental.

Ni was more than my brother. He was my best friend, a rock in times of craziness, a person who always made me smile, who forgave me despite my ugly behavior. I knew that we would never be able to maintain our relationship outside of the Games, that one or both of us would die, but that doesn't make his death hurt any less. A part of me wondered if his death was intentional. He completely froze when that tree started to crack-not even a blink. 

I spent many hours at the willow tree that day, trying to clear my head. Even now, the willow tree brings some comfort, just as long as I didn't think of Grey for too long. I lingered over how lonely I felt without my friends here. I was privileged to be in these games alongside great people, and now I have none of them. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how dependent I was. I never would've gotten this far in the games without them. Without them, I would be dead right now. So why is it that Grey and Ni had to die? They were the ones who deserved to live, who were actually strong enough to withstand this.

Being one of the top three, a part of me feels like I'm the hero of a story. Like I'm the one who perseveres and wins despite all odds. Except I know the reality. I was put into these games to die, and I'm no hero. I'm just a weak girl who had friends that she didn't deserve.

It was about the time that the sun started to change hue, from the white light of the daytime to the orange light of dusk, that I decided to leave the willow tree. I felt compelled toward the beach, where the games had started, and where they surely would end. I held a knife in one hand, a whole sheath on my back. As I walked through the black forest, following the river of blood, I kept my hand firmly grasped around the wooden heart necklace given to my mom so many years ago, when she was in the Hunger Games, when someone was so willing to sacrifice her life so that I would be born. It feels like my entire life has been one painful sacrifice after another, all for my sake, when I did nothing to deserve that. What have I ever had to sacrifice? What makes me so special? Why am I the one who everyone protects?

I walked out of the cold forest and onto the beach. The only noise came from my deep breaths and the swishing of the waves. I let my body collapse into the sand, taking time to notice each grain brushing against my skin. Then I sat and waited.

I have no measure of the time that went by. It was starting to get relatively dark by the time the figure emerged from the other side of the horse-shoe beach. He was a larger man, but not quite as big as Ivan. It was the other tribute, the one that I would have to beat to get to the end, the one that was already destined to win as long as Luke still sat behind that control panel.

The tribute made his way over to me, circling around the water. I debated standing. I debated running. I debated fighting. Then I just decided to sit still. It's not like I have a chance of winning anyways. If Luke could freeze Ni in place while a tree collapses on him, then he can do anything to me, anything to prevent these games.