He Was Never Mine [JJK X Reader] 💜

8. The Truth Untold 💜

JUNGKOOK'S POV:

So this is the schedule for today, I have to go through it. Let's have some breakfast and then start checking.

I said to myself before I made ramyeon.

"Wow, this is really delicious", I am munching the breakfast with kimchi and suddenly my thoughts drift to the concert day.

"I was really nervous that day. I got overwhelmed with all the emotions so to get some fresh air I went to the rest place.

I couldn't breathe properly before her kiss, but I don't know what happened after that kiss. I was totally fine and did well in the concert.

The weird thing is, I couldn't see any guilt on her face, that pissed me off and that's why I said she must be a hater.

But I should have given her a chance to explain but I am not ready to hear anything. The way she is smiling after the kiss as if she has done some good deed, creeped me out.

Was it a good idea to leave this topic there itself or should I have sued her?

I think I will stop thinking about this if I share this with someone.

I should talk to Jimin hyung later in the evening to free myself from these thoughts", I said to no one in the room and if someone observes me, they will definitely think that I am crazy.

I couldn't completely forget about the concert. Those memories are flashing often and I am not able to understand why I got affected this much.

"Our 1st schedule is near Han river", I heard members discussing and they are planning their next moves to adjust to the schedule for the entire day.

"As the schedule is over here, I think I should get some rest for sometime before leaving for the next place", I informed the members before leaving to the caravan which is in a parking area near Han bridge.

I am spacing out a lot these days, I need to focus on work. If members start observing, everything about me worries them.

I hate when Hyungs worry about me so I should try to concentrate on only one thing from now on, not drifting from time to time.

I spaced out again while reaching the caravan and noticed something.

"Why does she seem like she is alone? She is really pretty. But why is she familiar?", I said to no one after looking at a woman in her twenties standing near the rail as if she was ready to jump into the river at any time soon.

What if she is trying to jump from there? Oh no! I think I should go to her now.

I thought and started taking long strides reaching her but I suddenly stopped in my tracks as I recognised who she was.

"She is the same person from the concert. She was crying that day too but I didn't get a chance to think about it", my face became blank, I sighed and then I broke the silence.

"You are crying again like the other day, but why?", I asked her with mixed emotions in the voice.

She looked at me and my breath got hitched when I saw her eyes filled with tears. That made my imagination go beyond anything.

I am scared now. What is she trying to do here?

I mentally screamed.

"Don't tell me you are going to jump from here into the river!" I almost screamed , holding the rail with my two hands, looking into the river with my eyes wide, shaking my head left to right, mouthing a 'No'.

She looked pale as if she had just seen a ghost and was staring at me trying to say something.

"You have now started appearing in front of me. Kim Hyejin! You have finally lost your senses, that you are now able to see Jungkook right in front of you, looking damn handsome in his casuals", she said and I went silent as I am ready to listen to whatever she is going to say now.

"The human brain is so fascinating, I used to think it's foolish that the person about whom you are thinking a lot will appear in front of you and it's called an illusion.

I didn't believe in illusion or hallucination", she said and I am getting bored now because of the unfamiliar words she is using.

"You always care about me, love me in my dreams and imagination. But you were so mean to me that day. You didn't even listen to me. You said I sexually assaulted you right?

I am not sure whether you are my illusion or not, but I have to do this" she said those words, wiping off her tears before kneeling down in front of me, with her head hung low.

"Jungkookshi, I am really sorry about the other day for what I have done. I didn't do it with dark intentions.

Of course I am your fan who has been crazy for you for many years now but that doesn't mean I can kiss you", she said and I can see she is very nervous by the way she is holding the hem of her apron tightly.

She is a doctor. I thought and looked at her, who is in the most vulnerable state but I couldn't do or say anything.

"Actually it's not a kiss. It's mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, in simple words, it's a form of CPR. We usually do this to the person who is not able to breathe on his own or is having a hard time breathing.

If we leave him like that, it leads to cardiac arrest due to shock and the person's life will be on the verge of death.

I said sorry for using this procedure on you but not because I am regretting what I have done to you.

I didn't regret doing so, I just followed my instincts but maybe I took the wrong call.

You completely misunderstood me, it's not at all your fault. I can understand I am the one who is at fault, I don't deserve to be a doctor.

I am a first year resident in Yulje medical centre. I think I have to drop this idea of becoming a cardiologist.

I don't deserve to be a doctor, I think I don't deserve to live either", she finally let out all the words with heavy sobs.

JUNGKOOK'S POV ends.

I am not sure whether I made sense or not, I don't need to worry about what I have said so far as the person standing in front of me need not to understand anything, as he is just my mere illusion and I continued sobbing until a voice brought me back to reality.

"Jungkook-a, what are you doing there? I have been looking for you everywhere, it's time for the next schedule, hurry up", Jimin said as he didn't get any response from the other side so he started approaching our direction.

That's Jimin, wow! He is so fine, but wait....what he is doing in my illusion. Jimin shouldn't be there right, if it's not real.

That means everything that happened is real.

I came out of my thoughts and met the eyes which were filled with an unfamiliar emotion now.

He didn't say anything, he left with a heavy sigh before saying "Hyung! Please stay there, I am coming to you."

I couldn't get up from where I am, as I am not sure what I said earlier to him.

"What just happened? Did I explain everything correctly, what if he misunderstands everything again and sues me this time.

Fine! I will handle that too. Let's see what happens. But why did we meet again? I didn't expect that I could ever get a chance to explain everything to him.

He heard everything, the look in his eyes has changed now, but I am not able to understand what's on his mind now.

Even if he sues me or officially asks me for an apology, I will do that" I tried to encourage myself and I didn't dare to look in the direction where Jimin and Jungkook were going.

As it's been more than 30 minutes since I came here I thought to return to the hospital and take some rest before starting my shift.

So I left the place.