My Wee Mate

25 - Admission

Ailsa

     I sway my feet carefully over the water, watching the shadows of my legs swaying. I clutch the rugged wooden bark beneath my palms. The scratching and scraping against my skin is refreshing. It reminds me I'm here, that I'm still breathing, that I'm alive.

      For however long that may be.

     Soon I'll be far away from here, warming a strangers bed until I'm overtaken by my disease.

      I lean down and slip off my shoes, tugging at the laces with my trembling fingers.

      Sometimes outside is the only place I can catch my breath. Besides the dungeons.

     A ghost of a smile appears on my face while I let Fraser take over my mind for a moment. At least I will always have my memories to hold onto.

     The heels of my feet glide across the pond. The water is clear and cool, washing away my worries as tadpoles swirl beneath my toes, kicking up dirt and funky settlement with their little tails and back legs.

     Dragonflies of every color skitter across the surface of the water, leaving echoing rings that glide towards me. Their wings catch the sunlight, a rare occurancenon the highlands. It's rarely sunny. I try to let my skin drink in as much of it as possible before it disappears

     "There you are, lass."

     I sigh. I should've known she was after me, and would know just where to find me.

     Gentry stumbles through the underbrush to reach the ponds edge, holding her long skirts in her big, white knuckled hands. She may be powerful and wicked smart, but she's not the most graceful of women. She's large, with big bones and a thick figure.

     My maid comes closer, sitting next to me on the fallen tree that hangs suspended over the water. The tree shakes and sways as soon as she sits. I wonder if it'll break, but I'm not sure I would mind. The water would be refreshing, I was considering going for a dip earlier anyway.

     "What are you doing all the way out here, Ailsa? You know better than to.."

      "Go out in the woods alone. I know, I know." I say, waving her off with a wave of my hand.

     She raises her bushy brows at me, and I smile, showing my teeth and tilting my head innocently.

     "Might as well live when I can." I murmur, my voice as sweet as honeycomb. "This is where I feel alive."

     Gentry's face tightens, her lips flattening over her teeth.

     "I'm sure you'll father will see reason before a marriage takes place. It won't stand. I won't let it." She insists, taking my hand in hers, squeezing with her warm, strong grip.

      She keeps her feet tucked under her, trying to stay as dry as she can. I think about pushing her in and grin. It would be funny, but I'm not sure if it's entirely possible. She's twice my size.

     "And how would you know that?" I wonder, moving my eyes to the water so I won't have to see the pain lingering on her face that I adore so much.

     "Well, I wonder what a Laird would say when I reveal his bride is not hearty enough to jangle being a wife, let alone help run a clan."

      I look at my toes wiggling in the water.

     "So you'll make sure whoever I'm married to knows that he's marrying a defect for a bride?"

     Gentry's breath comes out in a whoosh.