ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕤𝕖 ℍ𝕦𝕕𝕤𝕠𝕟 (𝔸𝕜𝕒 ℍ𝕦𝕕𝕕𝕪) 𝕀𝕞𝕒𝕘𝕚𝕟𝕖𝕤 ❤︎☠︎︎

toxic (angsty)

Driving by his house, down his street is not something I thought I'd ever have to do alone. This was our street, that was our house. And now I'm driving by it listening to depressing music. I feel like half of me is gone, just lost in the wind.

My chest tightens when I pass his house. I never once thought it would be like this between us, I never once thought what happened would have happened.

*flashback*

"Y/n it's not that big of a deal, I was just with Charli!" Chase screams at me while waving his arms around.

This has been happening a lot. We fight all the time and sometimes for no reason at all. Sometimes he acts as if I don't even matter to him anymore.

"I don't care that it was Charli! I care that your spending more time with your ex than your own girlfriend Chase! Put yourself in my shoes, how would you feel if I was spending more time with my ex than with you?" I turn around after I'm finished, I'm tired of yelling at him, I'm tired of being yelled at by him.

"You wouldn't be with your ex." He says almost immediately which makes me stop in my tracks.

"Excuse me?!"

"Sorry for caring about you y/n but I wouldn't let you be around someone who hurt you." He says putting emphasis on 'hurt you.'

"What do you think your doing to me now Chase? Your fucking hurting me constantly. Your with her, you ignore me so you can play on your PS5, you ditched me multiple times, and come home drunk twice a week! Chase, you don't know what it feels like to be ignored."

"Dude, your being dramatic" he scoffs and I roll my eyes but I'm not done.

"Chase half the time I don't even know if you want me anymore! You make me worry about you constantly and I question myself all the time! You make it feel like you don't love me anymore when I still adore you and I don't even know why!"

"Well maybe it's because I don't love you anymore!" He screams.

I stop dead in my tracks, staring at him like a deer in headlights. I'm unable to move for what feels like an eternity but what I know is only about 30 seconds. I look up at him and hold eye contact for about 4 seconds before realizing he's not lying he doesn't love me. I don't think he has in a while.

With that I walked out the door and didn't look back.

**End of flashback**

Since that night I haven't heard from him. He didn't run after me, he didn't call or text. He posted about our breakup then a week later Posted that him and Charli are in a "happy relationship" once again.

I miss him more than I thought was ever possible. He treated me like shit and yet I still loved him, I think I still do a little. And I wish more than anything that I didn't.

A/n: not sure about this ending so sorry and no hate on Charli in this! I just used her as an example since her and Chase have history in real life. More updates in the making <3