Fortunately Unfortunate - Harry Styles

18-What If

Harry's POV

As I'm driving back home I cant help but wish she was still sitting in the passenger seat. I miss her laugh, I miss being able to glance over at her as she stares out the window and fidgets with her rings. She has an affect on me that I am not used to. I spend the entire drive back thinking about our conversation. Normally I drive with music blasting but here I sit in complete silence with only my thoughts, running absolutely ramped.

I  arrive home; well my LA home; and I flop onto my bed. I am absolutely exhausted and yet I feel like I cannot sleep, and if I were given the option I would choose to talk with Tiffany all night long. Really feeling like Late Night Talking is becoming extremely relevant to how I am feeling about her.

I cant get you off my mind

I almost wish I had her number so I could text her first thing in the morning. I honestly cannot believe I just gave her my number so simply. I mean, she does need a way to contact me and get into the concert with Rebecca, but still. Again, so unlike me. I begin to wonder how I am going to be able to keep seeing her after these last 3 nights at the Forum. I could invite her again for the last night., but I am sure coming to the same show 3 times is a bit much. I also don't want her feeling like she is obligated to. I just do not know how to go about this.

I start to second guess everything. What if she thinks I just pity her; I don't want her to think the only reason I drove her home and invited here for the next show is cause I "feel bad". I mean I do to an extent, I cant imagine what she's going through, but that's not the reason I did everything. Maybe I am a shitty person for not explaining that.

I start to get too caught up in my head overthinking everything. I have to sleep. I need to sleep. Is she asleep? Is she thinking the same way I am? I play out how tomorrow could potentially go. Both the good and bad

I think about the good first, trying to keep my mind away from the what ifs. I imagine she texts me first thing in the morning, like how I wish I could, telling me how excited she is to be coming back to the show. Maybe making some little witty comment about how she promises to not pass out this time. I imagine her arriving and me pulling her backstage until the show starts. I think about how I could show her all the ropes and everything I do before my shows. I think about how I could sing Late Night Talking to her from the stage, I mean it's perfect.

But I also think about how she could message me tomorrow and tell me shes not feeling up to coming; which is fine if she did...but how that may mean I never get to see her again. I think about how even if she did come how she may not want to be backstage with all the commotion. I mean there is a lot happening. I wonder if she will truly enjoy the family friends section or if she wishes she was in the pit dancing how she was before. I hope she doesnt feel stressed about keeping her levels perfect while she is here, I plan to have a little set up for her to come backstage if she needs insulin or sugar. I can provide the suagr for her, but not the insulin obviously. I want to leave it as a surpirse but what if she would stress less if I told her before the show?

I knock out before I can think of more scenarios that will probably not even happen and everything will be completely different than how I picture it.