F1/F2/F3 One Shots

Retirement - SV5

It was time to go.

You stood in the paddock, staring at all the mechanics as they ran out to watch Seb do donuts, taking your 3 small children with them. You'd started dating Seb just 3 weeks before his F1 debut and now it was all over. It felt so surreal. After 15 years, your fast paced life was coming to an end, to be replaced with relative calm. You were leaving the F1 world.

You took in everything around you not knowing when you'd be back. The world you'd come into as a baby faced 19 year old, you were leaving as a 33 year old married, mum of 3.

Tears began to prick your eyes as you replayed all the memories of these past years in your head. It was time for Seb to leave but it felt like it would be one of the hardest things you'd ever do. This was your village.

When they talk about raising kids, they say you need a village. The F1 paddock was yours, even before you had kids, everyone was there for each-other and then when the kids came along, it was so much more. Other drivers would babysit, mechanics answered every question that your inquisitive 7 year old had and a crying kid was instantly calmed with chocolate. 

"It'll be ok." Mick's mum, Corinna, said. "You know I'm only a phone call away anytime you need anything at all. I think that's true for the entire F1 paddock. You, Seb, the kids, you're beyond loved, you'll be missed, but we are still going to be here for you. You don't need to worry about that. Just enjoy this time here. Think about the good times and enjoy everything we've got." she added. You smiled before taking in a deep breath. 

"Aunty Corinna!" your middle child shouted, running over. "Hey, Theo!" she exclaimed, picking him up. "Mummy? Why is everyone making such a fuss over Daddy?" he asked. Your heart melted slightly. He didn't yet realise who his dad was to the F1 world and what he meant to so many people. His innocent view of the world meant he did see his dad having anything but a normal job.

"Because they love your daddy so so much, just like we do, and he's not going to race anymore. It makes them feel sad and they want to say goodbye because they won't see him as much. He did lots of winning which made them very happy. Some of these people were even as little as you when Daddy started racing but they're big boys and girls now, so they feel like a little bit of what it was like when they were little is going away. It doesn't feel nice when that happens. It'd be like you losing one of your teddies or breaking your special plate." you explained. He nodded, accepting your answer.

The 3 of you stayed in the same spots, staring at the world around you. It was changing and you didn't know how to feel. It was changing for what you were almost certain was for the better but you didn't know how to feel. It was changing and you couldn't do anything to change it or change the fact that you just didn't know how to feel.

"I'm going to miss this." you sighed. "It'll always be here and I know it doesn't make it any better. I've been here 3 times now. Every single time, I feel like this and then for the first 5 months or so, I love it. I wouldn't change the fact that they're home for anything. Seeing the kids with Seb will make it for you but it creeps back in. Slowly and never as much as you'd wish he just never retired but you wish you could have the community again. That second time, when Michael was at Mercedes, I learnt that it never really disappears, you just stop coming to the races. They're still family. Call them. Text them. Reach out. They'll be there." Corinna told you, wrapping her arm around you.

It was time to go.