Heaven Save Me

Into the Dark

A/N: Listen to "I Will Follow You Into the Dark" by Deathcab for Cutie for the vibe of this chapter.

The door opened to a sight that squeezed Jungkook's heart in ways he didn't know it could.  Jimin stood before him covered in ash and tears and something that smelled like vomit.  He collapsed to his knees as sobs wracked his body.  Jungkook barely had time to register what was in front of him before he followed Jimin down to pull his weeping form into his body.

Jimin cried against him as he shook violently in Jungkook's arms.  The man wrapped around him said nothing and simply let him continue until he calmed down enough to grip Jungkook's biceps and lean back to look up at him.

"I'm sorry.  I keep coming to you when I feel this way.  I don't know why I keep doing that.  I shouldn't..."

Jungkook shook his head.  "I'm here any time, little demon."

"Don't," Jimin pleaded in a broken whisper.  "Please don't call me that right now."

Jungkook nodded, taking in a sharp, hesitant breath.  "I'm here for you...little angel."

Jimin's bottom lip wobbled as tears dripped down his high cheekbones.  "I don't deserve that either.  Just...please just call me Jimin.  I just want to be Jimin again.  Just Jimin."

Scooping up the smaller man in his arms, Jungkook walked them to his bedroom where he laid Jimin down on the piles of sheets and soft blankets before tucking him into his body once more.  "Okay, Just Jimin.  If you want to talk about it, you can.  If you don't want to, then lets just sleep for now and I'll still be right here."

"Do you promise?"  Jimin squeaked out.  "The last man to make a promise like that to me..."

Jungkook felt the front of his t-shirt become wet as Jimin cried harder.  "You hurt him, didn't you?"

"I didn't just hurt him, Jungkook.  I...I...I destroyed him.  I ruined him and then I sold his soul for my power and freedom.  I...killed him.  But I didn't just kill him.  I broke his body beyond all recognition.  I'm a monster, Angel Boy."

Jungkook wanted to chuckle at the nickname, but refrained from it as Jimin clung to him tighter in clear misery.  "Have you ever heard of the archangels?"

Jimin glanced up at him in surprise.  "I...well, yes.  Of course.  I've met one, after all."

"Two," Jungkook smiled down at him.  "I'm guessing you meant my eldest brother Lucifer, or Namjoon as he goes by now, right?"

Jimin nodded, but said nothing else.  "Well...I am an archangel as well.  I'm the youngest archangel in fact.  I've only just finished living out my human lives that God assigned us all after the first incident with Lucifer.  Our human lives are meant to show us compassion for his lesser creations.  To humble us and to give us something to think of when we might choose rebellion and violence."

Still not speaking, Jimin blinked back his tears as he became engrossed in Jungkook's story and vulnerability.

"I haven't seen all my brothers and sisters or the other archangels for centuries.  Namjoon Morningstar...I haven't seen him since the dawn of creation.  I was barely created then.  I certainly wasn't old enough to join the war.  My second oldest brother, Yoongi or Michael he was called at the time, was the weapon of our father.  He was called the warrior angel.  Namjoon and Yoongi fought and Yoongi arose victorious while Namjoon was cast down from Heaven.  I was born into my first life at the time.

Gabriel, or Seokjin as he goes by now, was the messenger to God and has stayed by my side through the centuries.  He has been with me through each incarnation of my life and...my lost love.  One of the few Archangels not created by God."

Jimin straightened a little at that, turning nearly to stone with his discomfort.  Jungkook continued.  "Azrael.  He's the archangel of death.  Many misunderstand him as something evil.  Something cruel.  I never did.  I saw him as necessary and beautiful.  It seemed ironic that I, Raphael, the Angel of Healing, should fall in love with a bringer of Death.  However, when each lifetime was over for me, he would visit and he would start over himself.  He was so selfless in our love.  Unfortunately, I haven't found Azrael again since my final human life ended.  He never came.  I'm not sure he ever actually passed into death himself."

"You're probably better off.  Love is pain," Jimin whispered.

Jungkook shook his head.  "No.  I don't think so.  Real and true love is patient and kind.  It is sacrifice and generosity.  I will never forget my lifetime as Achilles when he was my Patroclus and stood beside me in war.  He died for me and was the cause of my greatest triumph.  When I finally fell, he came once more to take me on to the next life.  And I will find him again in this one as well."

"As an angel, I suppose you would deserve real and true love, but I...I do not.  Not after all that I've done."

Jungkook was starting to suspect something from the way that Jimin would speak.  From the energy he held and from the pull he felt towards him.  Something that Jimin was holding back.  The monster he claimed to be.  What had Jimin done that he believes his soul forever tainted by the deeds of his lifetime?

"Tell me, Jimin.  Tell me what you did to the man who made you a promise he failed to keep," Jungkook insisted softly.

Jimin looked far away as he began to tell Jungkook of Sung-woon.  The man he'd thought he loved and gave his body to, of what he'd endured because of him.  He told Jungkook of Hoseok's offer to become a siren and lure men to their deserving deaths.  Of what he'd done to the men he'd encountered since becoming a siren.  When he got to his description of what he'd done to Sung-woon, Jungkook joined Jimin in his weeping.  Perhaps Yoongi was right and Jimin was too far gone after all?

"So you see, Raphael, Jungkook...Angel Boy.  I don't deserve your kindness.  I don't deserve anything.  I was worthless in my human life and I'm a monster in my demon one."

"You said you feel guilt."

Jimin nodded, eyes not meeting Jungkook's.  "Then maybe it's not too late.  Do you want to be saved?"

Jimin leaned his head back to face the ceiling, "Heaven save me from what I've become.  I hate myself and what I am," he tilted his head back to face Jungkook.  "But what could I possibly do to fix this?  Things without remedy should be without regard.  What's done is done."

Jungkook jolted at those words.  "What?  What did you say?"

"What's done is done?" Jimin repeated in confusion.

Jungkook shook his head.  "No.  The other part."

"Things without remedy should be without regard.  I can't change my past, Jungkook.  And because of my choices, there is no fixing my future," Jimin lamented as he closed his eyes and snuggled against Jungkook.

"I haven't heard those words in a very long time.  Don't worry, Jimin.  No matter what your future holds, you will not face it alone.  I will follow you even into the dark, as you have always done for me.  It's my turn now...my prodigal love," Jungkook assured as he tightened his grip on a drifting Jimin.

***~~~~~~~~~~~~~~***

(1195 words)

A/N: I can't stop writing this story today.  I regret nothing.

Enjoy Lovely Armies!