Because Of You

Chapter 22

For someone who couldn't feel pain, Carmen had become close friends with it in the past few days. Although her injury was numbed by her condition, she hadn't felt more hurt in her life.

When she'd received medical attention, they'd stitched and bandaged her up, sending her to her room to rest. Nanaba and Lynne left on their own mission straight after the expedition, and Petra wasn't there to keep her in check anymore, so Carmen simply sat down and let tears consume her once more. If only the government could see her now, their unstoppable weapon was broken, crying into her own bloody hands.

She hadn't cleaned herself, she hadn't eaten or drank, and she most certainly hadn't made any attempts to sleep. Because what was the point? Her purpose had died along with the rest of her squad, so why continue? The female titans identity was unknown, so her revenge was decimated. Meaning there was nothing left for her.

For the third time, someone knocked on her door. There was no use, she'd already scared Eren away twice by throwing one of her daggers beside his head, simply a warning shot. She didn't want his pity or his help.

"Open the door brat." Levi ordered and banged his fist against the wood again.

Levi was the last person Carmen wanted to speak to. He was the one who told her to protect the squad, and she didn't only fail him, but also herself. Not even lifting her head to look at the doorway, she grabbed a knife and prepared to get rid of the nuisance.

Unlike usual, the captain didn't have the strength to kick down her door, instead he took a while to unpick the lock. "I told you to-"

Directly beside his head, the knife pierced the wall, but unlike Eren who manically ran away, Levi didn't even flinch. Accepting the fact Carmen wasn't acting normal, he turned to his side and pulled the knife out of the wall, admiring the precision of the woman.

"What are you doing?" Levi looked down at her. "You're filthy." He was right, she hadn't made any attempts to stay clean in the past 2 days, she'd given up. "Your wound will get infected."

Reluctantly, Carmen looked up at Levi but instead of being met with a cold dismissive gaze, she saw concern in his eyes.

"Leave." She demanded, voice low and monotone.

"And to think I went through the trouble of making you this." He ignored her request and put a cup of tea on the dresser, but even if the gesture was kind, Carmen wasn't convinced.

"You probably poisoned it." The assassin accused.

"If I really wanted you dead, I would've just left you here. By the looks of it, you've completely given up." Levi observed. "After all that fighting to stay alive, you're just letting it go to waste. I used to think you were resilient, turns out, you're just like the rest."

"What purpose is there for me to continue? I've lost everything that mattered." The woman asked, she didn't need to be lectured, she needed her friends.

"So that's it then? You lost your friends so you're going to let yourself die?"

"Precisely." Carmen hated that he was always right, she didn't have anything left.

But... maybe she did?

Her squad were gone, but she still had one final mission to complete. She'd postponed it long enough, but nothing was holding her back anymore, a prison cell was all that was waiting for her when she went back, but it was better than dying without reclaiming her purpose. Captain Levi was destined to die to begin with, ever since he crossed paths with Carmen. And now, it was time to act on that.

Levi scoffed, pointing at the tea again. "Drink it, or don't. In all honesty I don't care for your well-being." The captain continued to talk, he wasn't usually this talkative around Carmen, but with no one else to talk to, he had to aim his frustrations somewhere.