Once in a lifetime

Chapter 47 Past II

**Trigger warning, sensitive topic**

Harry wasn't even surprised at Zayn's last statement. Of course, he wouldn't be the one bragging about going to only one of the most fucking prestigious art colleges there were in the world. That was unbranded from Zayn, just doing what he loves because he loves it, nothing more, nothing less.

"I...m' sorry I cut you off. It was a surprise though, knowing you went to RCA. Keep going, please."

"S' all good, babe. The few people who know in the US have reacted the same way. I just don't usually tell anyone, yeah? M' just me and where I studied doesn't define me in the slightest."

"I know, and that's one of the many reasons why I love you, you are so fucking humble, baby."

"Says the guy who went to fucking Cambridge. Shuddup babe." Harry tried to reply couple of times, but no coherent noise came out of him. He just nodded in defeat, asking Zayn to continue with his story.

"So, she was just visiting, checking unis as she needed to start sending applications. We ran into each other at one of the cafes close by. Started chatting and by the time we had to part ways, she had given me her number. I didn't pay much attention to it; she was still too young, and I was under a lot of pressure with projects. We ran into each other months later, as I went to a mall and a photoshoot was going on. Looked like she had chosen modelling and she had it all to succeed."

"Wow."

"I know. I was mesmerized. She was funny, sweet, and beautiful. She gave me her number again and this time I did text her. We started dating, she was starting to build her career as model and was going quite well. We moved in one year after our first official date. It all started well, but at some point, it all went south. I was never a man of parties, and she was because of her work. I appreciated the quiet and peace, she was always into something. We grew apart and apart, I saw it and I didn't stop it. I loved her and I wanted to keep her by my side, thinking it would all work out at the end. Sex became a non-existent thing, always too tired or too bored for it."

"Wot?"

"Shuddup. So, as a last attempt to salvage what we had, I planned a romantic dinner. I cooked her favourite; I had candlelight and soft tender music waiting for her after work. It was like at the beginning of it all, we laughed, we talked, we kissed, we had amazing sex. We were probably too drunk too, and that's why she blamed me. Turned out, two months after that, three years ago early September she found out she was pregnant."

"Fucking hell..." Harry whispered.

"Fucking hell is right. I can't begin to explain what I felt when she told me, Haz. A different kind of love, a huge powerful thing grew inside me immediately. A little us, we created a new life, someone who belonged to both, someone to love, to adore, to spoil, to show the wonders of life. I was ecstatic. My mind went wild. I started planning stuff. We had two spare rooms; one I had turned into my art studio, and one used to storage my supplies."

"Oh baby..." Harry said, his hands caressing Zayn's back and thighs.

"Wanna know what's funny? I wasn't scared. Not for a minute. I knew we were still very young, she was still working on her reputation, but I though as long as we did it together, it'd be okay. I made enough to keep a decent living as my paintings were selling well. The heaviest load was on her of course. Her body was her work tool, so I knew it'd be a hard blow, but I would do all I could to help her recover fast."

"What happened?" Harry asked, after Zayn remained quiet for few seconds.

"I was working shit out in my mind, thinking about how to tell my family, how to tell hers. This all took seconds, babe. However, something was not right. When I went to hug her and kiss her for the gift she was bringing into our lives, she held one hand up and stopped me. I swear my heart jumped to my throat, fear crawling all over my body. Wus wrong dear? I asked her. She looked at me as coldly as ever and what she said next shattered my world into million pieces. I'm not having this baby, Zayn. I got a call from Victoria Secret half hour before the test results came in. They are offering me a once in a lifetime deal for a beginner like me. I said yes. I was still so fucking thrilled when my doctor called and told me about this. I'm not having this baby. I wanted to cry, babe. Curl up like a kid and cry my eyes out."