• our fading futures • akitoya • REWRITE BEGINNING SOON

• sorrow •

'TW: yelling'

{pov: toya}

{About a week later}

I was happy. And I hadn't been in a while because I'd been so drained from taking care of Tsukasa, but until last week where he finally got out of his sulk and went shopping with me. I spent the rest of the week with him and making sure his feelings were healed fully. It was a good feeling, helping someone else out. It made me happy.
And I'd done it so much recently... I smiled slightly. Rui and Tsukasa were so much better now, and I was proud. Things were looking up! And now I got to see Akito, that made things even better, like a cherry on top of a sundae. I'd came to terms with my feelings for him during my spare times and decided I liked him back. However, he hadn't been messaging me, and I was too busy with Tsukasa to have a full conversation with him. It was odd. I was used to him spamming in my messages until I texted him back. I'd messaged him that I was going to school tomorrow, but he hadn't responded.
This morning, I'd decided to go to school with Tsukasa. I imagined how it was like what a parent would feel, dropping someone very dear to you off at a school and not knowing what would happen to them. I was nervous, but I just considered it normal-ish. He'd be walking to school by himself, so I would be until I met up with Akito. I smiled as I thought of him, butterflies flying in my stomach.
I packed for school and was about to leave, and then I checked my texts to make sure Akito was coming. "No response?" I mumbled, questioning his actions. "Maybe he's sick today." I thought aloud. I messaged my group chat with An and Kohane, 'Hey! Are any of you free to walk to school with me since Akito isn't responding to my texts? :D' I asked them, adding the smiley face because I thought it was cute. Kohane responded after a while, saying she'd be free to meet me around Vivid Street, since Kamiyama and Miya were close to each other.
I started the walk, and it was about 10 minutes until I got to Vivid Street, kinda the halfway point between school and my house. I saw Kohane waving at me, and I waved back and walked over.
"How are you, Toya? Even though I haven't seen you for a week or two, it still feels like forever!" She said once I had walked up to her. "I've been great! The first week was pretty hard, but last week was good. Me and Tsukasa got to spend some bonding time together. It was really nice." I smiled softly, thinking of his smile and how I wanted to protect it so badly. "How are you and An?"
Kohane's cheeks went slightly red with a blush. "Oh, she's so sweet! It's practically the same thing as before, but more kissing. My parents and Ken, obviously, both support us, which is great." She lowers her voice to a whisper. I bend down to let her whisper in my ear. "An told me about the... thing between you and Akito. I think it's very likely he likes you." Kohane whispers. I nod. "Good. I like him back." I smile, whispering back to her.
"Well, let's get started with the walk!" Kohane suggests, and I oblige. There is a few reasons why Kohane is my best female friend, but the most of them is because of how intuitive she is. When I was persuading her to start dropping hints she liked An, she realised that she actually liked her back before I did. We were kind of the smart duo of Vivid Bad Squad.
We make small talk about her snake, Count Pearl, and how the snake feels like a sister to her. I find that interesting, so find my attention piqued the whole conversation. She goes along the lines of people being scared of Count Pearl, and I instantly think of Akito. I wonder what he's doing now.
I smiled slightly. I knew I was in love, and I was going to let myself walk right into that trap.
"Toya? Why are you smiling?" Kohane asked, looking up at me with her big eyes. I smiled at her. I knew she'd be too perceptive to lie to. "Just thinking about Akito." I said truthfully. She giggled slightly, and said, "I know that feeling. You can't stop thinking about him, can you?" I nodded. "Well, I was distracted when you were talking about Count Pearl, but I guess now I'm not." I nodded my head gently.
"Have you talked recently?" Kohane asked, and I feel a twinge of guilt in my stomach. "I was too busy to spare time to talk to him last week." I sighed. Kohane looked at me, and then shrugged her shoulders. "I guess that's fair enough." She smiled. We were almost at Miya, and I said my farewells to Kohane. "Anyway, since he most likely won't be there, I'll spend some time with An." I nod my head, waving slightly to her as she crossed the gate, her friend... Minori, I'm pretty sure, tackling her into a hug with a wide smile.
I smile slightly and then walk away. The weather was getting colder, somehow, so I put my hands in my blazer pockets. After about 5 minutes of walking, I made it to Kamiyama. An said she was going to be a bit late in the group chat, so I decided to wait for her. I stuffed my bag in my locker, and waited outside.
Suddenly, I spotted someone out of the corner of my eye. It was Akito. My heart fluttered, and I realized he was walking past me. "Akito!" I yelled with a smile. He didn't turn around. Odd. Maybe he had headphones in or something. "Akito!" I yelled again, standing up, and grabbing my school books. I walked slightly faster than he was over to him. "How are-" I was cut off by Akito taking an unnecessary sharp turn. He was frowning too. Maybe he was upset about something? I hoped I hadn't hurt his feelings.
I shrugged, and waited for An, deciding to leave him to his thoughts and not pester him. I decided to read my book, but was still distracted by Akito's happy voice not having a conversation with me, or laughing, or- "Tsukasa-senpai! Kamishiro-senpai! Hello!" I said, noticing the duo hovering above me. They were so amazing... And talking to me! What a privilege.
"Hello, Toya." Rui said, a smirk on his face. "Me and Tsukasa just wanted to thank you for helping us so much. I think we agree that you helping us helps us in turn feel better." Tsukasa fumbled for something behind his back. "These are for you, my second biggest fan!" I smiled as he passed me a large bouquet of red roses, with a confident smile on his face. "Tsukasa-senpai..." I said, feeling my face go red. I smiled widely myself.
"You'd better not be taking advantage of Toya to do something bad, huh? You know he looks up to you." Rui turns around. "We'd never take advantage of anyone, Shiraishi." I could practically see An's joking frown on her face. "You sure? Maybe it was like that time you 'tested' your confetti tracking missile on me." She said, folding her arms. "My uniform had confetti all over it."
"Anyway, back to the topic! Toya and Tsukasa are back!" An says, tackling me into a hug. "Ooh, I missed you..." She says, pinching my cheeks like a grandma, which makes them go slightly red from the pain. I smile through one of my cheeks being stretched slightly. "I'm glad to be back, too." I said happily. I was very happy to be around my close friends. "By the way, where's Akito?" She asks quizzically. "I saw him earlier, but he must have had headphones in, because he wasn't listening to what I was saying... It kind of felt like he was ignoring me, but he'd never do that."
An sighed. "Oh well. He'll find us-" Suddenly, the bell signifying the start of homeroom began. "Oh shit! I need to put my bag in my locker. See ya, Toya!" An smiles, sprinting away.
"We'd better get going as well, Tsukasa." Rui says, with a slight smile. Tsukasa nods and the two of them say goodbye to me. I wave goodbye as well, and pick up my roses to put them in my locker. Once I reach my locker and swing open the door, I try to put the roses in as gently as possible without squishing or ruining them. I was about to start getting my stuff for first period, when I feel eyes staring into me. I look around and my heart skips a beat. It was Akito... But he looked different. And not good different. His eyes were red and had developed bags, and his hair was messy. His uniform was too and I wondered what was going on. "Akito! Hi!" I said to him, but he glanced at me coldly and sprinted away. "Curious." I murmured under my breath, getting my books out. I decided to talk to him at recess.
The first two classes flew by and it was eventually time for recess. I shoved my books in my locker quickly, trying not to damage the flowers, and decided to look for my friend. I looked for a bit, and finally found Akito sitting under a tree, leaning against it.
"Akito!" I said, my smile growing every step I took closer to him. He squinted at me, and as I walked closer, I realised that his gaze was cold and hard. "Akito?" I said, my smile turning concerned. "Are you-" I was interrupted by him yelling, "Would you just shut up?" I looked at him. "What am I doing wrong?" I said, disappointed in myself for making him upset. "Toya, don't you understand? Don't pretend you care about me anymore. You want me to die, don't you? You don't care about me as much as a random person on the street." I looked to him in confusion. "You only care about Tsukasa and Rui, don't you? You couldn't spare one minute to care for me. Not that I need it, anyway."
"Akito, of course I care about you. What's going through your head?" I said, getting slightly mad that he'd accuse me of that stuff. "You didn't text me for a whole week because you were busy hanging out with your precious Tsukasa! For two weeks! I doubts he needed that, huh?" I pursed my lips together, as Akito got closer to me, his hands balled into fists. I was scared he'd punch me, being honest.
"Why can't you spare some time for me, huh? Why can't I feel the same way he did?" He said, his eyebrows furrowed. I didn't like when he did his serious face. "Akito. Tsukasa's sister passed away, if you didn't realise. He needed that." I said, trying to be formal, but with all this anger for what he was accusing me of doing, it was hard to.
Akito flinched before saying his next sentence. "What if my sister passed away? What if I feel like nobody cares about me? What if I want to disappear, just like she did? Well, that's true, Toya. I hope you feel amazing." I see tears welling up in his eyes as he says it, and I know it must be true. "Akito... I didn't..." I say, trying to comfort him or be some sort of stress reliever.
"I'm leaving, Toya. Don't bother waiting for me at Weekend Garage, ever. I don't have any motivation to do music." He says, running away. I try to run after him, but I'm too slow. He's too fast, and I am forced to watch my friend run past where I could catch him. I feel tears welling up in my eyes, and I let them fall onto the grass.

‹Word count: 2036›