February 6 2009
I went to a gore site, trying to familiarize myself with death. Death is macabre yet so beautiful. I find things such as blood and death astonishing which most people would think Im a freak for. So I mostly keep my fantasy to myself.
Just what is after death? I ask that to myself every night. The concept that we know nothing of yet we're so terrified of it. To me The afterlife refers to the belief in a realm or state of existence that one enters after death.
I believed it to be a place of judgment where the soul is sent to either heaven or hell based on one's actions during life. Some people believe in an afterlife that is less defined or less connected to specific religious or cultural traditions. For example, some people believe in an afterlife where the soul continues to exist in a non-physical form, or in a spiritual realm where souls can communicate with each other.
Overall, the nature of the afterlife is a complex and often deeply personal belief, shaped by individual experiences, cultural traditions, and religious teachings.
Such complicated bullshit. Tsk.. wish god was just here to answer my questions so I can peacefully kill myself.
I think I might be in love. OR maybe Im just trying to romanticize my lonely life. I really hope its the second one. Shes my next door neighbor and she waved at me this evening. I think she likes me. nope, Im overthinking this. Im mistaking platonic affection for love. Jesus just how much more pathetic can I get. But GOD DAMN she IS smoking hot.
Shit I got distracted. I was watching gore videos and now Im here writing about some random girl and afterlife in my diary. Yeah I think Im gonna go to bed. The affects of alcohol has set in
