Dangerous Fellows (Imagines)

zion :3

warning! contains mentions of sex and the use of alcohol and drugs
(may not be suitable for certain audiences)
___

Your relationship wasn't progressing in any way. It was like before, and you dared to say that it was even more... How to say it? Now, there really was no talking in between. Your relationship evolved only into the acts of sleeping together, you barely exchanged a few words. It felt different than the normal Zion, especially when you saw his with his friends in the halls or parties, where be acted like his usual self, too loud, always talking and laughing.

Where did it go wrong?

You asked yourself this question numerous times throughout your life, only this time, it involved a very certain boy with fiery red hair, and a very pretty girl on his lap.

You thought that it will only be you two. No other people, no other affairs. By this time, you knew that Zion didn't have any feelings for you. That it was - just like he had said - only momentary, and when he got away from you and was with someone else, the feeling quickly vanished and never came back. It was also obvious from the way be treated you. Calling you up, sleeping with you, then nothing. No hellos, no dumb jokes, nothing.

It hurt to think that while you were here, at this party, spying on Zion and the girl, it hurt to think that he didn't even care enough to keep this part of the deal, that there will be no other people. And that he didn't bother to hide it, but rather displayed it right in front of your own eyes.

You had the answer to your question - where did it all go wrong? It all went wrong ever since you had firstly agreed to become friends with benefits with him. No. It was back at that party and he handed you the cup with alcohol, and when you took it from him - that's when it all started and went wrong.

Even with your conflicted feelings, you still knew damn well you'll say yes whenever he calls, as if seeing him with all those other girls wasn't a signal enough you should end things before even something worse develops out of this. It was going nowhere and doomed to end nastily, you knew, if you won't end things soon.

You just couldn't make yourself tell him no. This relationship was the only thing which provided any ties between you two, and you held onto the thin strings way too strong. For some reason, you didn't want to let him go even when he didn't show any more interest in you than as if he saw you only as some sex toy to play around with, to mess around with and use however he pleases.

For some reason, the feelings you had before - when you thought you liked him - were still there. You had his body, yes, but you wanted him. You wanted Zion and all his dumb jokes and his dumb laugh and dumb smirk. And these feelings seemed to only grow stronger day by day as you realized that he can never quite belong to you anymore. You were so close, yet he was never more distant.

He made you quite aware that it was you who destroyed your relationship in the first place and he wasn't planning on starting with you again, freshly. No, he made you feel it deep in your skin and bones that he won't commit to you in any way ever again.

He was aware of the power he held upon you. He still enjoyed your sex, but it was only that, plain sex. No sweet whispers, no cheesy nicknames. Only the pleasure, and when he was done, you weren't interesting for him anymore, he threw you away like a used rag.

He held the knife stuck in your heart and was twisting it cruelly.

*

To be honest, you expected everything to get back on its old tracks when you two got back together into the relationship you had. Was it so foolish of you to hope for that? You indeed felt like a fool anytime you saw him with another girl and when you felt your chest throb painfully upon the sight. You didn't want to feel anything since it was so obvious that he didn't, but you had no control over your heart.