How To Find Your Future

10 - Feelings Are Gross

Charlie

Me and dad sit together in his office shuffling through the papers of Olivia's answers.

"She finished these fast," he comments.

I nod. "I think she's really wanting to find a job for herself."

"Doesn't she work at that fudge bakery?"

I nod. "But I don't think she's happy there."

Dad nods. "That would make sense why she's looking for a job then. Is that the whole reason?"

I shrug.

Dad raises an eyebrow. "You didn't ask her that?"

"No. Should I have?"

Dad sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. "It's always important to know why someone is looking for a job. It can help you with finding a more serious job or a part time job to get them over."

"Oh."

He reaches out and pats my hand. "It's alright. This is your first case, you're going to make mistakes."

I nod. "I know that."

Dad smiles sadly at me. "Now, should we start making a list of potential careers for her?"

I nod.

"Alright." He spins around towards his computer and starts to type. "She appears to be an adventurous, outdoors, active person."

"She also likes to do art."

"Who sometimes takes the calm route. What else did you learn?"

"She's a big fan of animals. She doesn't like the sight of blood but she can stand it. She believes everyone deserves a fair chance."

"Hm. There's quite a few jobs that could work for her."

"Really?"

Dad nods. "I don't think I've seen this big of a list since..." He looks over his shoulder at me. "Since your mother."

"Mom?"

Dad nods. "I'm sure you don't want to hear about her. So let's just focus back on-"

I shake my head. "No. I want to hear about her."

When mom first left I hated her. I didn't want to hear anything about her. As I got older and started to... not care so much I didn't care, but I still tried my hardest to avoid any talk of her. Now, part of me wishes she had stuck around. Maybe I always wished that and just denied that I did. But, I want to hear stories about her and get to know her. Even if she doesn't want to get to know me.

"Are you sure?"

I nod.

"Well, after you were born and your mother started to struggle she was seeing a therapist. They had suggested she try and find a job that would allow her more routine and rules in her life. She used to struggle with that. When you weren't needing her attention her mind would slip and she'd have a hard time coming back. So a job that she could do while also being around as a mother seemed like a good idea."

"I'm guessing you treated her like a client when she came to you?"

Dad nods. "It was the only way I knew how to treat her. We went through all the questions and made a list. It was huge. The bigger the personality someone has and the more likes versus dislikes they have, the bigger amount of jobs there is for them to try. So we went through the whole list. Tried each job, experimented, all with you right there by our side."

I smile. "Did she end up finding one?"

The fond look that had been on dad's face drops. "No. She had fun and loved so many of them but she told me working wasn't for her. She couldn't do it. Not with you needing her."