𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬

Chapter one

Brisbane, 2023

Can we really escape from our past ?

The one who expects love to be sensible may never have been in love. Every bit of pleasure is followed by a bit of suffering, every burst of laughter by a tear ready to flow, because that's how this strange world goes.

It is 2:55 p.m. and I am trying to find a way to communicate with my patient. He has difficulty speaking, especially with people he doesn't know, he hasn't gotten used to me yet and he tends to pause between sentences, letting the sound of the rain take over.

"I have been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder."

And it was from these words that the tears began to flow. It made me think of him, of Niki, of the remedy that saved me from the fog, from the storm, from the darkness and from the agony.

Brisbane, 2015

Looking at the stars, a sweet euphoria takes hold of me, transporting me into a world of dreams where each twinkling star is a source of infinite inspiration.

"Rae !"

I am interrupted in my thoughts by a voice that brings me back to reality. It was Niki, I could smell the enticing aroma of the chocolate waffle he was holding in his hand.

"If you want it then do it with me" he said pointing to the most sensational ride.

"Are you crazy ? I won't do it !" I said as I snatched the chocolate waffle from his hands.

"Im kidding ! tell me what you want to do ?" he said laughing

"Do you want to take pictures ?"

"Yeah, let me fix your hair" he said while he carefully tucked a strand of my hair behind my ears.

A smile appeared on my face.

It took me several seconds to realize that there was no one left but us. "oh, it's almost midnight and everyone has -" suddenly a voice interrupts me.

"We have now been closed for 30 minutes, could you please leave the premises immediately? If you don't leave now, I will have no choice but to call the -"

Before I could even respond, Niki grabbed my hand and we started running as fast as we could to get away from this man. The wind was hitting my face, it didn't bother me but my heart was beating wildly, animated by an unsuspected fervor, in this frantic race towards freedom.

Brisbane, 2023

"I can't overcome my fears and anxieties, i feel so weak" he said while looking at the ground, blank eyes.

"Imagine that your mind is an ocean. Sometimes the waves can be calm and peaceful, but other times they can be strong and turbulent. Your traumatic memories may be like a storm that stirs up the ocean, but there is always a quiet depth below. You can learn to connect to that quiet depth within yourself and remember that you are more than your traumatic memories. You can give yourself permission to rest in that quiet depth and take care of yourself."

"I have to go home...and thank you."

"Are you sure ? We still have time."

"I'll come back" then he left the room.

February 27th, 2014, Brisbane

"what's your name ?" I asked.

"Niki."

"When did you start having nightmares?"

"since my parents are no longer here. I see the same scene in my nightmares, again and again, it's killing me inside, please do something, save me"

His voice was so soothing that I could listen to it for hours without getting tired, as if it could heal all the wounds of my soul. His almost daily nightmares puzzle me. What kind of torment does he have to face to make his nights so restless? I would like to know more about his fears to help him face them and maybe one day find the rest and peace of mind he deserves.

"Healing begins with the willingness to put the past behind you. The past can be like an imprint on our soul, leaving invisible scars that everyone ignores."

He had looked at me in such a way that silence was imposed, in such a way that I could see eternity, an unreal dream, a new world. The shadows dissipated, giving way to the light of his gentle gaze.

His eyes were like veiled stars, hiding behind their veil a deep sadness and unspeakable pain. His gaze was filled with melancholy, as if he had experienced the most intense and darkest of sufferings.

Despite the veil, I could feel the strength, as if each star refused to be extinguished despite the darkness that surrounded it.