Loki: Miss McWilliams, we meet again.
Maddie: Would it kill you to wash the bag?
Loki: You can scream all you wish, Miss McWilliams. I'm afraid no one can hear you! [Maddie just looks at him coldly] Why...uh, why isn't she screaming?
Hulk: Miss McWilliams, if you don't mind?
Loki: Like this...aaahhhh! But that's...that's a poor lady scream. [the brain bot he's holding in hand suddenly bites his hand and he screams in pain]
Maddie: [sarcastically] That's a little better. Is there some kind of nerdy supervillan website where you get Tesla coils and blinky dials?
Hulk: Actually, most of it comes from an outlet store in-
Loki: Don't answer that.
Hulk: (whispering) Romania.
Loki: Don't! Stop! She's using her nosy reporter skills on your weak-willed mind to find out all our secrets.
Hulk: (gasps)
Loki: Such tricks... won't work on me...
Maddie: Please talk slower.
Loki: ...temptress!
Maddie: Wait, what secrets? You're so predictable!
Loki: Predictable, predictable! Oh, you call this... predictable?! [pulls a lever]
Maddie: Your Alligators, yes! I was thinking about it on the way over.
Loki: What's this? Boom! In your face. [deploys a gatling gun]
Maddie: Clichéd.
Loki: No, look! Watch. [brings down the giant blades]
Maddie: Juvenile.
Loki: Shock and awe!
[Loki brings up a chainsaw]
Maddie: Tacky.
Loki: Oh, it's so scary! [activates a cycle of spiked boots]
Maddie: Seen it.
Loki: What's this one do? [now frantic he unleashes a flamethrower]
Maddie: Garish!
[Loki breaks down]
Maddie: Okay, the spider's new.
Loki: Spider? [sees the spider hanging in front of Maddie] Uh...yes! The...the speiiiider. Even the smallest bite from "arachnis deathicus" will instantly paralyze...[Maddie blows the spider on Loki's nose] Oh! Get it off! Ow, it bit me!
Maddie: (sigh) Give it up Loki, your plans never work.
Loki: Let's stop wasting time and call your boyfriend in tights, shall we?
(cut to Thor Museum debut)
Mayor: It is with great pleasure that I present to Thor this new museum. If you please!
(Thor cuts the ribbon while a man with a trenchcoat in the crowd shuffles)
Man in Crowd: Uh, hey! My kid can't see.
(The brainbot in the trenchcoat reveals itself, as people begin to gasp and panic and black smoke surrounds the stage)
Loki: (evil laugh)
Thor: Loki!
Loki: Oh, bravo, Thor! (Crowd booing) Boo! Yes, I can play along, too. Boo!
Thor: Should have known you'd try to crash the party.
YOU ARE READING
Loki
FanfictionThough he is the most brilliant supervillain the world has known, Loki is the least successful. Thwarted time and again by heroic Thor, Loki is more surprised than anyone when he actually manages to defeat his longtime enemy. But without Thor, Loki...
