Me In Your Eyes

30

Warning: self harm & suicide

Author's pov

It's been five hours since Jimin's dad left his room but the room was still the same as before. All messed up with the broken crumbles. Jimin didn't move an inch as he was lying down on the ground, letting out small tears.

"You're so pathetic! So pathetic, Jimin!", he mumbled. Jimin shifted his head to look around his room. He chuckled, saying "Look at what you've caused because you craved pleasure. Because you craved for freedom. You can never have that! You're not a bit worthy of it. How even, when you lied to your own parents? You lied to them, stole the bike and yelled at them. Such a bad son!"

Jimin paused, grimacing at all the remarks he got from his parents, recalling them all over again for who knows how many times now. He slowly sat up and leaned back on the wall. Jimin reached out his hand to the nearby switch to turn off the lights. The brightness was even more annoying for Jimin. During times like these he preferred the dark.

"Why do I even exist...?" Jimin sighed out, closing his eyes. Another tear escaped his eyes. He dropped his left arm off his thigh hitting something. The clink sound caused by it, made Jimin to divert his attention to it.

"Hello, darling. Missed me?" Jimin let out a shaky smile, taking the small knife in his hand. The whole ruckus might have made the knife to escape it's way out of his pillow hideaway.

Jimin slid his forefinger over the sharp edge of the knife, saying, "Haha, I'm sorry I threw you away last time. I shouldn't have done that- you were my only true friend. I should believe what my mom and dad said. Everyone at that college are fake. They weren't really my friends. Only being with me because I gave them notes, because I have a cool bike. Namjoon, Jin, Taehyung, Jungkook- all of them are fake!"

Jimin took the knife and pressed it on his palm. He folded his hand into a tight fist and cut it his palm with a harsh pull! "Jungkook... Haha, what was I even thinking about when I told him I like him? He was only being nice with me, helping me. I misinterpreted his politeness to be something else."

Jimin opened his hand, watching the blood oozing out heavily out of the cut. He moved the knife away from his palm, it to his thighs. More privacy there, so no one would know. He started his work there.

Jimin winced every time he made new marks on his body with the bloody knife, speaking in between, "He must've felt disgusted at my confession. Who wouldn't? When someone I've just met says that to me, I'd feel disgusted too! But... it still hurts... Is this how Yoongi felt when I rejected him... He seemed like a good guy, I shouldn't have hurt him. You're such an heartless person, Jimin... you are... so..."
         
           
         
Jimin pov

"Hey, Jimin! Come out and eat!" I heard someone saying, knocking on the door. How long was I blacked out? I looked up at the clock. It was 8 o'clock? Just 3 hours? I checked the windows to realise it was already daytime. Oh, so 14 hours then?

I wouldn't be surprised. I tried getting up, making sure I won't make any sound of discomfort. I looked around my messy room. How do I clean it all up? I sighed. Let's just wash up and go have breakfast. Not that I'm hungry, but I gotta show them my face before they leave for their work to make sure I'm alive.
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I sat quietly on the table as I kept nibbling my bread. Just as always, not one ounce of regret or guilt on their face from yesterday's events. As if nothing happened.

"We're holding an interview for the editorials team." Mom said, gazing her phone. Dad tsked on hearing her. He said, "Again? You just held one like a month ago!"

"They just keep resigning for unknown reasons! And the one's left are so incompetent!"

"Is it your employees or you who is incompetent?"